Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Dotti Groover-Skipper. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Dotti, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Risking taking is a huge part of most people’s story but too often society overlooks those risks and only focuses on where you are today. Can you talk to us about a risk you’ve taken – it could be a big risk or a small one – but walk us through the backstory.
“Nobody sees me”, she said…”nobody”. These are the gut wrenching words I’ve heard repeatedly in my 40 plus years of being “in the trenches of the human trafficking arena. It was over 4 decades ago when I first heard those words quietly murmured through painful sobs and tears. Her words that day were a gut punch to me. As a child, I often felt invisible. I remember being in dance classes as a child. One year for the recital, I was cast as the Big Bad Wolf in ‘Peter and the Wolf’. The costume included a full head covering…a wolf head that completely masked who I was. As a 4th grader, struggling with feeling invisible, I remember so vividly negotiating with my sweet Mom and Miss Ann, the dance instructor, to please not make me cover up who I was. They listened, they saw me, and I danced my heart out, with no headcover, during that recital because I was heard, seen and empowered. Perhaps that bold savviness was rooted in my middle child pecking order! In some small way, 40 years ago, it resonated with the “middle child me” when this troubled 13-year-old girl cried “nobody sees me”. She felt invisible, even in the self-esteem class I was teaching. She did perk up though and was so happy when I agreed she could bring her 4-year-old sister with her to our next class. When I met her little sister, I did not feel joy. You know, how you know, how you know in your gut that something isn’t right? When I met the 4-year-old, my feeling of uneasiness was so incredibly strong! I convinced the organization who hired me to check into the living environment of the two girls. What was discovered still haunts me today and continues to drive my work. These precious little girls, lived with their grandmother who was selling both of them, most every night, in exchange for drugs. To make it even more horrific, the 4-year-old had a sexually transmitted disease. These girls were sex trafficking victims living with their pimp, their perpetrator, their human trafficker who happened to be…their grandmother. The intersection of my life with these priceless little girls completely changed my life’s trajectory and now I fight to help change the dangerous trajectory of others. The Lord plucked a string in my heart that day to take a risk…a huge risk and fight for those who have not yet learned to speak for themselves, to fight against injustice and to see and embrace the vulnerabilities of others. I have been gifted this compassionate bravery and perspective which is the fundamental core of how I view and live life. My 40 plus years of experience has mainly been with sex trafficking victims and survivors who have been forced, frauded or coerced into a sex trafficking situation. I have had the opportunity over many years to minister to women in the strip clubs of Tampa Bay. These are invisible, unseen, and misunderstood women…many of them are under a trafficker’s control.
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.
Forty years ago, I took the risk to engage in a very dark world. ..the world of sexual exploitation and human trafficking. Over the past seventeen years, I have strongly felt the need to go into the darkest crevices in my community and seek out those who are trapped in the adult entertainment industry. My organization, HeartDance Foundation, Inc, was established in 2008. We go into the strip clubs of Tampa Bay and build relationship with the women and their children. We have no agenda but to let them know that we “See” them…they are not invisible and they are of great Dignity, Value and Worth. For those women who are ready to get out of the life, we sit with them and help them develop a safety plan to get out. We assist them in finding a safe place to live, and through our ‘HeartDance Connects’ initiative, we help them secure job training which may lead to viable employment. This is possible by working with our many extraordinary partners. We are very fortunate to have men on our team. We call them our “Men of Valor”. The men do not go into the clubs with the women team members, but stay in the parking lot and build relationship with the valet guys, the door guys, security, DJ’s, managers and sometimes the club owners. Our men assist the men employed in the industry to help them get out of the lifestyle. One common thread that we have seen with the men and the women working in this industry, is that the majority were sexually abused as children and have had a very rough time climbing out of that pit of shame, keeping them trapped in a lifestyle they do not want to be in and in many cases under a pimp or traffickers control. Our team works hard. All posititions are volunteer, including my position. No one is paid. All money raised goes into scholarships for job training, team trainings, outreach gifts, survivor and program needs. We truly help transform lives and for that, we are extremely blessed.
We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?
Many, many years ago, my best friend convinced me to undergo training for Prison Ministry. It was a ten week program in order to go into the nearby women’s prison to facilitate a 4 day program. I did not want to do it, but my friend was so convincing and insisted we do this together…so I agreed. The day came when it was time to actually go into the Prison and I did not want to…I went in kicking and screaming! I am appalled today that my attitude back then was awful. My thoughts were, “What in the world can I possibly have in common with “those” women! I’ll do this for my friend and be done with it.” Going in, as soon as I heard the loud ‘clink’ of the gate, I was trapped. Within a few minutes, as a small group leader, I was placed at a table with 7 inmates and within a few more minutes I was laughing and having a blast with “those” women. We had heartfelt conversations and I realized that “those” women were no different than me. I was one decision from being right where they were. Some were domestic abuse victims, some were victims of sexual assault, but all, including myself, were women…women who were brought together to encourage and lift each other up. That experience completely changed my entire outlook on those who are in different situations than me. This experience taught me to love unconditionally and to “see” the invisibles.
What do you think helped you build your reputation within your market?
In ministry, in the business arena, and in life, integrity and character are everything. I believe I have maintained my great reputation by being authentic, following through on promises made, and not engaging in sideline gossip. This has helped build a sense of trust among our team, our partners, our community and most important, the beautiful people that we serve. In my many years in the trenches I continue to be sought after to serve on local, state and national boards…including some boards that needed Senate confirmation. I began by serving on local community and government boards. Being authentic, following through on promises made and not talking about folks behind their back, was appealing to others. This led to state and national board membership of which I continue to serve today. It has also led to numerous awards, honors and recognitions. Most of all, I have to live with myself and answer to God in how I live and in all I do! 
Contact Info:
- Website: www.heartdancefoundation.org
- Instagram: @DotSkipper
- Facebook: Dotti Groover-Skipper
- Linkedin: Dotti Groover-Skipper
- Twitter: @DotSkipper