We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Diane Nares. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Diane below.

Hi Diane, thanks for joining us today. Let’s start with the story of your mission. What should we know?

The personal memoir that I have published, His Place at the Table is a collection of stories about my son Emilio. Emilio was my only child and he was diagnosed with leukemia at three years old. Emilio endured his cancer journey for three years, and sadly, I lost him shortly before his sixth birthday. My book is a powerful love story which introduces my readers to my magical child, Emilio. Emilio was courageous and tenacious, witty and wise, sweet and charming. He inspired my husband, Richard and myself every day that we spent together. Our goal was to do everything possible to try and save our son’s life. Three years after Emilio’s passing, we created the non-profit organization, the Emilio Nares Foundation. Knowing intimately the many challenges that parents face through their child’s cancer journey, we chose to focus on the underserved communities of Southern California. Celebrating 20 years of compassionate programs, the two of us now serve as ENF Ambassadors and Advocates. A tremendous team works together under the leadership of Executive Director, Elsa Morales -Roth to ensure that ENF moves the mission forward to serve additional families in need.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

I am a first-time author, although I have been a journal writer since I was a young girl. The message of my book is to share my story about love and resilience through one of the most profound losses a person can experience, the loss of a child. My intention is to reveal to anyone who has lost a significant person in their lives, that they can experience other emotions beyond grief…that they will reappear. Yes, grief never really goes away, and shows up most often when least expected but the time will come when the ratio of grief vs. joy will shift, allowing each of us an appreciation of the moments when we can smile again, feel the depths of a simple experience such as walking through nature, playing with our animals, sipping a delicious coffee with a good friend… I find it helpful to view grief as a complicated emotion which lives within a big basket that’s filled with love, sadness, faith, community, hope, and anger. Service to others in need became the healing tool that eventually helped move me forward back to living a life of filled with compassion, peace, and grace.

We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.

When Emilio relapsed from his leukemia, Richard and I were faced with several decisions to make regarding Emilio’s care. Together, we refused to listen to the doctors who told us to take Emilio home to die. We traveled the country to meet with the most renowned Bone Marrow Transplant Oncologists. We would go anywhere in the world to save Emilio’s life.
The reality that there was not a matching donor for Emilio on the national and international bone marrow registries, lead us to discovering that there was a Phase Two Study transplant with Richard as donor, being done at Boston Children’s Hospital/Dana Farber Cancer Institute. After studying this transplant and flying there to meet the lead, renowed transplant pediatric oncologist, we packed our bags and took Emilio to Boston. We never regretted this decision, it was his only chance and we knew that if we didn’t try this, we would always regret it.
We were brave and resilient. We took our cues from our precious little boy. The strength of our marriage showed up as grace within the pain. Ours is a love story and the result of this love story is Emilio. Living a life of reflection is an ongoing process, and nothing about it is easy. But the healing comes from learning that my life purpose was to be Emilio’s mother and to share him with the world.

Have you ever had to pivot?

My post college career was restaurant management. I loved the industry and since teenage years I worked as a server which provided me an opportunity to stay in my private Catholic high school with my tribe of friends. This came about when my parents announced to me that I would have to leave my school and attend the local highschool because they could no longer afford the tuition. I was the oldest of six siblings, and in their words, “your brothers need to remain in their schools so, you must leave yours”. It was the late 60’s. After taking a few breathes, I told them that I would get a job. I became a waitress and that job provided me the means to not only pay for my tuition but attend a university, obtain, a college degree, and travel to Europe three different times in my 20’s. However, the day came when I knew that I could not wait tables forever, so I entered a management program with a corporate restaurant group, and spent the following ten years in restaurant management. The time came eventually when I realized I would probably not ever find a life partner and become a mother if I remained in this business working evenings, weekends, and holidays while available partners were enjoying their time with friends and family. I eventually learned that I had to get out of the restaurant business the day I ended up on the bathroom floor! More about this in Chapter 4, His Place at the Table. And so, I used my relationships and networked seriously, to segue into the International Wine Industry, the loveliest career of my life, which 30 years later provided me with the opportunity to retire and finally write my book about Emilio.

Contact Info:

• Website: dianenares.com
• Instagram: @dianenares
• Facebook: Diane Cappetta Nares
• Linkedin: Diane Nares
• Twitter: @DianeNares

Image Credits
Nancy Jo Cappetta