Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Denetra Smiley. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Denetra, appreciate you joining us today. How did you come up with the idea for your business?
Smiley Connections, LLC came from my group on Facebook called Parents That Have Lost Children Support Group, which came from the lost of my 28 year old son to cancer in 2018. I wanted an escape from the grief and wanted to find other angel parents that have experienced this pain, and wanted to know how they got through this. So I created the group thinking there’s so many other grieving groups out there, and no one would join, but I was wrong. I have 261 members from all over the United States, men and women, and we are a family.
They get to come to a safe space to talk about their angels anytime of the day or night. I provide information about getting through grief, information about reaching out for help with the grief and a connection between other families that are experiencing the same pain. Thus, Smiley Connections, LLC was born in December 2022. I wanted to try and put smiles on people’s faces while they try and find some type of healing for themselves and their families. I wanted them to take the first steps in just talking about it and being able to express themselves without feeling judged, a nuisance, or someone having a wave of emotions and no one understanding.
I am in the process of creating a retreat for them to come to, to escape the norm of laying around, not wanting to get the house or just knowing how to adjust to their new lives, the life without their children. We find just the simple things like just breathing sometimes hard, so once a year, I want them to come meet other people that look like them, talk about their angels, memorialize their angels and help with guidance and support to adjusting to life as a parent that has lost a child.
This is all dedicated to my son DeAndre Thompson, who had an infectious smile and a personality out of this world. He was loved by many and his fight was what gave me my fight to not only continue with life, but help others. He taught me to stand against the storm armoured and ready no matter what comes my way. Even through his 3 1/2 years of fighting Osteosarcoma cancer, he always had a smile on his face like he knew that there was peace where he went. I love and miss him every minute of the day. It sometimes gets no easier, just tolerable.
My mission is to reach out to parents all over the United States and provide them with a place they can come to every year or even sooner, to find themselves again and be able to realize that we’re still here and our families need us. I want parents to look at grief as not the end of their lives as well, but a start to remembering their angels positively and knowing that they’ll always be with us.
Denetra, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
I was born the oldest of two in Charleston, SC, my home until 1995, I moved away to Jacksonville, NC when my husband of 28 years, went into the Marine Corps. We lived there for 4 years and moved back to South Carolina. We lived there for 15 years, before I decided I wanted something new, something different, which led me to Atlanta in 2018, a city outside called Acworth, GA. I love love love this area. I think God led us here to weather this storm we’re going through and I think it has been the perfect place..
My son was moved here in 2018 after his cancer progressed and transitioned in our home with us right by his side. We had just moved to GA when life was interrupted and everything was put on hold.
After his death, it took me two years to even come to terms with myself about his absence and whether it was a dream or was I myself deceased as well. It took a LOT out of me.
When I created Smiley Connections, LLC, I also created a petition online for a fight for better medical leave for parents that lose children as well. It has over 1435 signatures and people are gradually signing it. The petition is geared towards Senators to change the FMLA laws, which protect parents jobs when they have to take off part the 3 to 4 days allowed to grieve their children.
In Georgia, parents that have children are protected up to a year after the birth of their children, a special exclusion, and is able to take additional time as needed to care for their newborns, but a parent that loses a child, don’t have that option. Parents have to go through the dreadful process of proving why they need off and not knowing how long they will need. Grief has no time limit when you lose a child. It is not the same as losing a parent.
I have spoken to Senator Ossoff and Warnock s offices, had a virtual meeting with Ossoff s office, and nothing has come out of it. I reached out to my local Senate and no help there either. So I am in the process of implementing a plan to get it out there more and getting the help I need to push this bill, DeAndre’s Law one day soon.
Can you open up about how you funded your business?
Starting Smiley Connections, LLC financially has been a struggle. Everything I have collected has been from small donations from friends and family members. I haven’t been able to incorporate funds because I’m not a 501c3, and sponsorship is null and void. Companies won’t invest in me and creating something wonderful fory parents, because I’m not a nonprofit organization. It’s sorta forcing me in that direction.
I am in no where wealthy, so I have worked hard towards my first retreat, which failed, because I just didn’t have the funding to do everything I wanted to make the retreat special, so I will try again in 2025. I have positive thoughts so I am going bigger and better in 2025.
It is really hard for people to see you as new small business owner, especially in my own African American community. There is no support among us, because we are in competition with one another, when we should be helping one another. I struggled with friends who I knew that had businesses and never reaching out to help me get started or even giving an encouraging word. I reached out to people I supported in the past, and was overlooked. It was hurtful, but I dusted myself off and kept it moving. It is sad, but it is reality. So, my advice to other small businesses coming up, work hard, believe in yourself and never fold. Believe in your dreams, walk in this thing called business without expectations, so that way you won’t get your feelings hurt. Don’t give up!
How did you build your audience on social media?
I started my business Smiley Connections, LLC from my Facebook group, “Parents That Have Lost Children Support Group” social media page.
Social media is a beast and you need to be prepared for any and everything. I haven’t experienced any difficulties with my group as of yet, because I have strict rules and protect my group because of the private information, that the members share about their deceased children. Social media can be cruel, so I try to provide a safe and family oriented group where parents have somewhere to come vent, cry, and celebrate their angels. I provide a chat in messenger 24/7 where someone is always there, where they can go in and share their angels.
I do live chats and have meet and greets to meet some of the parents. Some just show their faces and never say anything, but cry, and that to me is an honor, because I know they are trying and they chose my group to do that.
Contact Info:
Image Credits
All Logos: Shauntel Reid, digital creator and author Photo w/ brown dress: Sease The Moment Photography, Marvin Sease Jr. Paint and Sip fundraiser, Smiley Connections, LLC