We recently connected with Deborah Feathers and have shared our conversation below.
Deborah, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Parents play a huge role in our development as youngsters and sometimes that impact follows us into adulthood and into our lives and careers. Looking back, what’s something you think you parents did right?
I was raised by a single mom who worked incredibly hard to support me through University because she valued education and wanted a better life for me. She believed that education was the key to opportunity and breaking through limitations, and she made countless sacrifices to ensure I could move forward. One thing she always said when challenges arose was, “We’ll figure it out.” Those words became a mantra in our home, guiding us both through tough times.
One story that stands out is from my early college years. We didn’t have much, and paying for school was a huge challenge. While my mom didn’t cover my tuition directly, she took care of the essentials—rent, food, and other expenses—so I could afford to go to school full time without the added burden of a job. I knew the financial strain this put on her, and I worried about how we’d make it work. One evening, I voiced these concerns, even suggesting that maybe I should take a break or work full-time instead of going to school. She looked at me, smiled, and said, “We’ll figure it out.”
That phrase wasn’t just about logistics—it was about her unwavering belief in education and in my future. No matter how tight things were, she never made me feel like pursuing my dreams was out of reach. She was determined that I would have the chance to succeed, even if it meant stretching every dollar and sacrificing her own comforts. Her belief in education and in me gave me the strength to keep going, even when things were tough.
Her dedication profoundly impacted my life. It’s one of the reasons I was able to return to school later, earning my bachelor’s degree in psychology and eventually pursuing a master’s in marriage and family therapy. Watching my mom’s perseverance and faith in the power of learning inspired me to never give up, and it shaped the way I approach both life and my career.
Today, as a trauma-informed relationship and sex coach and a soon-to-be licensed marriage and family therapist, I bring that same resilience and commitment to my clients. My mom’s example taught me the importance of believing in others and finding a way forward, no matter how difficult things may seem. Her support not only helped me succeed in school but also instilled in me a deep sense of responsibility to help others on their journeys.
One of my biggest goals now is to help her retire and take care of her, just as she has taken care of me. I want to give back to her and make sure she can finally rest, knowing her hard work and sacrifices made everything possible. My success is as much hers as it is mine, and being able to care for her is one of the driving forces behind everything I do. She showed me the power of perseverance, love, and the belief that things will get figured out, and that continues to inspire me in everything I do.
Deborah, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
I’m a trauma-informed relationship and sex coach with a strong academic background, a deep commitment to helping others, and personal experience in overcoming trauma. I hold a B.S. in General Psychology and am currently pursuing my M.S. in Marriage and Family Therapy. As a member of the Delta Kappa Honor Society, Pi Chapter, and soon-to-be inducted into the National Society of Leadership and Success (NSLS), I’m on track to graduate Summa Cum Laude and make the President’s List. Currently, I am gaining hands-on experience through internships at a trauma center and a private practice, allowing me to integrate academic knowledge with real-world therapeutic skills.
My journey into this field was deeply influenced by my own experiences working through sexual and medical trauma. I understand firsthand the complexities of trauma and how it can impact relationships, self-worth, and intimacy. This personal healing journey has fueled my passion for helping others navigate their own paths to recovery and build healthier, more fulfilling relationships. It also allows me to relate to my clients on a more personal level, bringing empathy, compassion, and understanding to the table in every session.
In addition to my academic studies, I am certified as a Life and Success Coach, Mindset Coach, Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) Practitioner, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) Practitioner, Time Integration for Maximum Empowerment (T.I.M.E.) Practitioner, and Clinical Hypnotherapist. These certifications equip me with a diverse set of tools to address trauma and emotional healing holistically. Each modality offers unique techniques to help clients break free from limiting beliefs, emotional blocks, and trauma that may be hindering their relationships and personal growth.
For example, NLP allows me to help clients rewire harmful thought patterns and beliefs, while EFT provides a way to release deeply held emotions related to trauma. Clinical Hypnotherapy gives clients the opportunity to access and reframe subconscious memories that may be holding them back, and T.I.M.E. helps individuals integrate their past experiences in a way that empowers them to move forward. These certifications enable me to create tailored, trauma-sensitive strategies for each client, ensuring their healing process is both safe and transformative.
In addition to my coaching and therapeutic work, I serve as a Guardian ad Litem (GAL), GAL Mentor, and Educational Surrogate, advocating for vulnerable children in the legal and educational systems. These roles have enriched my understanding of trauma and its far-reaching effects on families and individuals, further informing my work with clients.
What sets me apart is my trauma-informed framework, which blends my personal experiences with academic knowledge and a broad range of therapeutic techniques. I create a safe, supportive environment where clients feel heard, validated, and empowered to reclaim their lives. I work closely with individuals and couples to address challenges related to intimacy, communication, and emotional connection, particularly for those who have experienced trauma.
One of the things I’m most proud of is my ability to help clients feel safe enough to share their stories and begin the healing process. Having walked this path myself, I know how difficult but necessary it is to break through the barriers that trauma creates, and I am committed to guiding my clients through that journey with care and expertise.
For anyone considering working with me, I want you to know that I bring both personal and professional insight to the table. My goal is to not only help you heal but to empower you to live a life of thriving relationships, self-love, and personal fulfillment. Together, we can dismantle the effects of trauma and create the life and connections you truly desire.
We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.
Certainly. One story that truly illustrates my resilience is rooted in my own experience of overcoming sexual and medical trauma.
Years ago, I faced a medical condition that not only threatened my physical health but also affected my sense of self and my relationships. The trauma from both the condition itself and the invasive medical procedures I underwent left me feeling powerless, disconnected from my body, and fearful of intimacy. It was a time in my life where I felt trapped—trapped by pain, by fear, and by the trauma I was carrying.
It was through this experience that I learned the true meaning of resilience. I sought therapy, leaned into my support systems, and began working on myself—exploring not just the surface level of healing, but the deeper emotional and psychological layers. I delved into trauma work, learning how to reclaim my body, my mind, and my sense of agency. The process wasn’t linear—it was full of setbacks, moments of frustration, and doubt—but each step, no matter how small, was a testament to my strength and commitment to healing.
This journey also motivated me to dive deeper into the field of trauma-informed care. I knew that if I could overcome this, I wanted to help others do the same. That’s when I pursued certifications in Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP), Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), and Clinical Hypnotherapy, among others. These tools not only helped me on my own journey but have also been invaluable in my work with clients. I learned how to break through limiting beliefs, release trapped emotions, and rewire my thoughts in ways that allowed me to heal and move forward. These same tools now help me empower my clients to do the same.
One of the most pivotal moments of my resilience came during a therapy session where I was working through the fear and shame I had internalized. I was guided to confront those emotions head-on, which was terrifying at first, but incredibly freeing. I realized that healing isn’t about erasing the past—it’s about integrating it in a way that allows you to move forward with strength, compassion, and grace.
Today, I can say that I’ve fully reclaimed my sense of self and have a healthier, more fulfilling relationship with my body and with others. The journey taught me that resilience isn’t about being unbreakable; it’s about being able to rebuild when you’ve been broken. It’s about having the courage to keep going, even when it feels impossible, and trusting in the process of growth and transformation.
This experience has been a cornerstone of the work I now do with clients. Having been through my own trauma, I am able to sit with others in their darkest moments, knowing firsthand what it takes to rebuild. It’s this resilience—this ability to rise from the depths of pain and reclaim your life—that I am most proud of and that I aim to foster in everyone I work with.
How about pivoting – can you share the story of a time you’ve had to pivot?
When I was 18, I had dreams of becoming a physician’s assistant. I enrolled in college with high hopes, but my journey was soon interrupted by serious health challenges. The school I attended was not accommodating of my needs, despite their legal obligation under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA). At the time, I didn’t know about my rights or how to advocate for myself, and without proper support, I was forced to leave college. It was a devastating experience. I believed that my health condition had permanently blocked my path to higher education and, with it, my dream of having a meaningful career.
For several years, I felt lost and disheartened. I was uncertain of what my future held and unsure if I would ever be able to pursue the career I envisioned. But everything began to change when I was 27. Encouraged by some very special people in my life who believed in me, I decided to return to school, this time with a clearer understanding of my rights and a newfound determination to succeed.
I enrolled in a program to earn my Bachelor’s degree in Psychology, which became a pivotal moment in my journey. Through my studies, I developed a deep passion for understanding human behavior, trauma, and relationships, and I realized that my path was shifting. I wanted to help people heal emotionally and relationally rather than through medicine.
After completing my B.S. in Psychology, I decided to pursue a master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy to deepen my expertise in this area. While working toward my M.S., I became increasingly passionate about trauma-informed care, particularly in the context of relationships and intimacy. My personal experiences with trauma had already shaped my worldview, and I knew I wanted to focus on helping others overcome the impact of trauma in their own lives.
During this time, I also began pursuing certifications in various life coaching modalities. I earned certifications in Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP), Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), Time Integration for Maximum Empowerment (T.I.M.E.), and Clinical Hypnotherapy, among others. These tools became essential to my work, allowing me to help clients break free from limiting beliefs, release emotional pain, and develop healthier relationships. The combination of my academic background and these specialized techniques provided a holistic approach to healing, one that addressed both the mind and body.
The journey from wanting to be a physician’s assistant to becoming a trauma-informed relationship and sex coach—and soon to be a licensed marriage and family therapist—wasn’t what I had originally planned, but it was exactly where I was meant to be. My experiences with overcoming my own challenges, combined with my education and certifications, uniquely positioned me to help others on their healing journeys.
What started as a setback turned into a transformative pivot. The obstacles I faced early in life became the foundation for the work I do now—helping individuals and couples heal from trauma, improve their relationships, and build fulfilling lives. Looking back, I see those challenges not as barriers, but as stepping stones to where I am today, doing work that I am passionate about and that truly aligns with my purpose.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://deborahfeathers.my.canva.site/
- Instagram: https://instagram.com/deborah_feathers/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborahafeathers/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/deborahfeathers/
- Twitter: https://x.com/DFeathers55749
Image Credits
Leo Rojas