We recently connected with Crystal Contreras and have shared our conversation below.
Crystal, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today How’s you first get into your field – what was your first job in this field?
“How would you feel about co-teaching a theater class of about 12 students ranging from 8 to 11?”
My eyes opened wide and my 16 year old heart swelled with pride. “What? Why? How? Yes? Yes. Yes?” My eyes darted back and forth from my best friend to the UIL Coordinator.
The UIL Coordinator of my school explained that the teacher that was supposed to do it had a car accident and was unable to teach. They could not find a replacement since it was so last minute and my Performing Arts High School Director suggested my best friend and I for the position because of all our work in the theater dept.
Larissa and I jumped for joy and chattered excitedly about how they asked us over the seniors in the program! We were proud and perhaps had an inflated ego. We couldn’t stop planning and talking about all we needed to do. We obsessed over everything.Her mom, who had been a theater teacher, gave us tips and ideas to use. We picked the play, “Wiley and The Hairy Man,” by Susan Zeder. We spent days cutting the play to be 45 minutes long. We made lesson plans and planned the month out after school. Needless to say we were over-achieving nerds. But this was our dream. We were going to go to St. Edward’s University, major in Theater Education, and become High School theater teachers. We were going to live in Circle C ranch (because that’s where her cool aunt lived) and be next door neighbors… You know, easy, peasy, lemon squeezy. And this? This was the 1st step in our life plan.
“This is gonna look so good on our resumes”
Honestly, I was more nervous to begin teaching my 1st class of 4th graders when I was 24, than this summer program at 16! The boldness and cockiness of a 16 year old is unmatched. Nothing was my fault, if it went wrong it was because someone trusted a 16 year old and if things went right it was because I was amazing, and there was no in between. Sometimes I miss that boldness, but most of the time I cringe.
The job was a blast at first. The children were all labeled GT (gifted and talented), they were excited to perform, and of course thought that we were the COOLEST because we were high school kids. I honestly didn’t know enough about anything to know what was going wrong. But what was going right? We were playing theater games, hosting auditions, running lines, blocking, and rehearsing. Our theater kid hearts were bursting every day.
Half-way through, we began having doubts. The 5th grade boys were annoyed with our games, the 2nd graders were feeling left out, and the only kids that seemed to be having fun were the 3rd and 4th grade girls. We felt deflated. Maybe we were in over our heads? Maybe we should have said no. These thoughts swirled in our head, but we were too proud to quit or ask for help. We worried that if we asked they would regret their decision to hire us.
So, we crammed. We stayed late one evening thinking of ways to include all the kids and researched different theater games. We decided to split the groups and play 2 different games so that everyone liked the games and got something out of it. The smaller groups helped us get to know the kids better and we were able to tailor the activities to their interests. This little fix changed everything and all the kids opened up and started participating and buying into the class. By the end of the Summer, we had successfully directed the play and the children performed to a room full of proud parents! The students received a standing ovation and we kept hearing, “I can’t believe High School kids did this!” We floated through the halls, the waves of compliments carrying us through.
This experience put me on a track to teach. I loved teaching kids new things, watching their eyes light up when I helped them accomplish something that they thought they couldn’t, and sharing my love of theater with them. My goal was to teach high school theater. I loved my time in the theater department and wanted to share that love.
When I finally went to St. Edward’s University, I ended up dropping my Theater Major after my 1st semester. Whomp! Whomp! I realized that I didn’t love Theater the way other people did. I loved MY Theater people, MY friends, MY teachers. College was different. I didn’t want to spend my nights and weekends at the theater with people that I didn’t know very well. The program was so big, it was easy to get lost in the shuffle. I never felt like I belonged. After the 1st semester, I dropped my theater major and decided to be a High School English Teacher instead.
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers
I’m Crystal Contreras. Commonly known as Ms. Contreras. I began teaching at 16. And have taught in some capacity ever since. I’ve taught Theater, Pre-School, High School, 4th and 3rd grade all in Spanish, all in English, and 2 way Dual Language, I tutor students privately in Math and Reading, and now I’m working on becoming a Dyslexia Therapist, while I continue to be the Reading Interventionist on my campus.
If you would have told a 16 year old Crystal that she would be a bilingual elementary teacher, she would not believe you. She’d think you were out of your mind.
As I shared before I changed my majors from Theater to English and I was going to teach High School English. I got my 1st job at 22 at a Charter High School. This school was the last shot from some students because they had either flunked out of AISD or been kicked out. I heard all the cliches when I started teaching, “Don’t smile ‘til December… Don’t tell them your age… Fake it ‘til you make it…”
At 22, I really did not have the patience, empathy, and compassion that is needed to reach high school aged children. We were so similar and too close in age. It was a difficult job, students cussed, yelled, and were so disrespectful. I was lost.
My survival instincts kicked in. My motto was, “Do what you want, just don’t bother the kids that want to learn.” This is exactly the wrong attitude to have, because these are kids that everyone has given up on. I’m not proud of it, and I sincerely apologize to those students. I was a child myself and didn’t fully comprehend the weight of my actions. Fortunately, due to lack of enrollment I was laid off a year and a half later. This opened up an opportunity for me, an opportunity that I probably wouldn’t have followed had I not been laid off.
I enrolled in an alternative teaching program for high need areas. I was bilingual and bilingual teachers were in high demand. I had spent most of my life trying to assimilate and rejecting any semblance of my heritage. I just wanted to be “normal.” I practiced speaking so I wouldn’t have an accent, I straightened my hair, I made sure I had the newest outfits, etc. This was NOT a part of my plan. But, I needed a job and when I chose not to get certified in college, this is what I had to do. Once you’re certified in Texas in one thing, you can pay to get certified in any subject or grade as long as you pass the test. My plan was to get alternatively certified, teach elementary for a year and then look at my options. Maybe middle school? Maybe a district High school, again? I just needed to get it done and move on.
Well. I fell in love. I never expected that. I fell in love with my students. I fell in love with my ancestral language, my brown skin, my curly hair, brown eyes, and my culture. I saw myself reflected in my students and I didn’t want them to feel the shame I had. I wanted them to be proud of themselves, of their heritage, and their language. In doing this for them, I gave myself permission to also be myself. My 1st year in AISD was hard, but so rewarding. I stayed some nights until 9 or 10 pm and still couldn’t quantify what it was that I did. I raised the student’s scores and was able to build strong relationships with my students and parents. I loved my school and my team and felt like this was exactly what I was supposed to do with my life. My students’ wit, laughter, struggles, and wins made every day a joy and made me feel so lucky to be their teacher. “A mi hija nunca le ha gustado la escuela, y nunca había hablado de ir al colegio, pero este año con usted, me dice que quiere ir al colegio y ser maestra como usted.” “My daughter has never liked school or talked about college but this year with you, she tells me that she wants to go to college and be a teacher just like you.”
I recounted that story to my husband with tears in my eyes after my 1st parent conference. I left that school to be closer to home after my third year, but it will always hold a special place in my heart. My 1st class picture is framed in my hallway with all my students’ signatures and little notes.
My proudest moment was when one of my toughest students brought me a handmade banner that read, “Best Teacher Ever!” The day before she had to be removed from my room because she was shouting and calling me a liar during my lesson. This was because she had brought 120 dollars to school. The student did not want her mother to touch the money at all, which is why she brought it with her. I had collected it from her with the promise of returning it at the end of the day, but my principal came to my room and told me that her mom needed to pick up the money because I shouldn’t be responsible for holding it and the student shouldn’t have it. When the mom came, the student exploded. She saw red. She felt betrayed by me and angry at her mom. I couldn’t get through a sentence without her yelling at me and calling me a liar. She destroyed my bulletin board outside my class and had to be escorted out by the principal. I went to visit her at lunch and apologized to her. I told her that I didn’t have a choice and explained what happened. I didn’t mean to lie and I understood why she was upset. I gave her a hug and told her that there was nothing that she could do or say that would make me stop loving her or being her teacher. I told her that I hoped for a better day tomorrow and that I couldn’t wait to have her back. That was one of my most challenging years. But that sign when she walked in the next day, gave me the confidence to know that I made a difference and love and patience would see me through.
People don’t treat children with the respect they deserve. They often talk to children in a way they would never talk to adults. Imagine telling one of your colleagues to be quiet in a staff meeting in front of everyone, or chastising them for making a mistake. HR would probably want to talk to you about creating a hostile working environment. But with children? They’re held to a crazy standard, a standard that most teachers can’t even meet. In my class, there are no surprises. You do what you need to do, and we get to do what we want to do. If you are having trouble, we’re going to talk about ways to fix it. We’re a team.
What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?
Comparing yourself to others is only going to set you up for disaster. We are all unique and offer so much knowledge and experience, just because you got there before or after someone else doesn’t make you better or less than. You have so much to offer the world and you have to do it on your own terms with your own timeline. I constantly compared myself to others and always felt that I came up short. I was always chasing that next thing, the next certification, the newer model car, the nicer apartment. The more I coveted what others had, the worse I felt about myself.
I stayed late because I thought that’s what I had to do to be the best. I handmade posters, made elaborate bulletin boards, and offered free tutoring before school. I ran myself ragged. There is a quote that says something like “Public Education is dependent on teacher’s free labor.” And Boy is that a cold, hard fact. I was comparing myself to 10 year veterans! Of course, I was never going to catch up. I used to be so hard on myself. I worked long hours trying to achieve something that veteran teachers had just mastered.
I don’t remember who told me but I remember a conversation where someone told me to write to myself as if I was my best friend. She told me imagine your best friend just told you all the things you told me. What would you tell her? Would you tell her to work harder, to do more, to be better?
We are so much harder on ourselves than other people. I wrote the letter and had an epiphany. I was so helpful, compassionate, and understanding of others, but when it came to myself that compassion and grace was non-existent.
I had to unlearn the way I treated myself. Now, I treat myself like I would treat my best friend. When I catch myself beating myself up or talking down on myself, I remind myself that I’m my own best friend, and that I wouldn’t let anybody else talk to me that way.
Giving myself this grace and empathy has deepened my empathy for myself and for others. It’s helped me be happier and prioritize what I need.
If you could go back in time, do you think you would have chosen a different profession or specialty?
I would. I was born to teach. I have had many struggles in this profession. I have sat in my car crying and praying for an answer when I felt like I could not do this another year. And in those moments when I’ve been at my lowest, I am always given a sign that renews my hope and joy. Sometimes, it’s a student that sings me a song with the exact lyrics that I needed to hear, or a banner, or a sweet email, a big hug, or a tearful thank you. This is what I was meant to do with my life and I will do it until I can’t.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: ms_contreras_