We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Coco Novak. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Coco below.
Coco, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Let’s talk legacy – what sort of legacy do you hope to build?
I find that many people stay in relationships and jobs that no longer serve them. There’s an expectation that because you studied X, you should continue working in that field forever. Similarly, if you’ve been in a relationship for Y amount of time, you must carry on indefinitely because of the time invested. But if you’re unhappy and no longer bring out the best in each other, I believe it’s time to reassess.
Life is not always an upward trajectory; it’s like an ocean wave. Sometimes you ride the wave and have the best time of your life, everything unfolds naturally. Other times, you may feel stuck in a rut, and you feel things will never change.
Let’s tackle work first; it’s less emotional 😊. People are different: some like change, some want change but fear failure, and some don’t need or like change. I won’t discuss the last group as it’s unfamiliar to me (and too boring). I like change and suspect I might even thrive on it.
Let’s look at my career pivots—these are all true! I studied farming, then pursued a PhD in Biochemistry and Molecular Biology at the Medical Faculty. After enduring my postgrad for five years, I decided to open a high-end baby store and become an entrepreneur. Toward the end of my postgrad, I had my first child while living in Zurich (where my ex was doing his postdoc). Inspired by a great baby store there, I thought I would do the same in Slovenia. Everyone thought I was nuts, but I believed it was a great idea. Famous last words! I ended up closing the company five years later, despite making €1M in revenue, due to the financial crash. I also crashed and burned out. By then, I had my second child and was running my company while enrolled in an EMBA. It was all too much.
Fast forward a few years, I moved to London with my two sons to be closer to their dad who is English (and relocated back after we split up). It was good for the kids, and I had always wanted to live in London.
So much drama! I couldn’t find a job for almost a year. Not only that, but I didn’t even know what I wanted to do. I took a high-pressure sales job (think The Boiler Room). After taking some time to reflect on what actually excited me, I realized that the only thing I truly enjoyed was playing tennis. OMG! Yeah, who doesn’t!
I now figured out what I loved but had no idea how this could benefit me. Then two events happened simultaneously. One of my coaches suggested I could easily be a tennis coach due to my style of play and high energy. I didn’t believe him. Then, they assigned a guy (whom I thought was nowhere near my level) to be my line manager – and I knew that I couldn’t let this be my life. That same evening, I signed up to become a Level 1 tennis coach. I quickly climbed the tennis ladder and have loved what I do ever since.
Fast forward five years (to now). I still love tennis and it has given me a wonderful career. But I’ve also always wanted to write my autobiography, which I published in December 2023. Since then, I have hosted a popular podcast called “The Coco Novak show aka Tuesday Talks” and launched two webinars – one for single parents: SIngle, and too tired to mingle; and the other named “Fearless!” for people who want to move forward but are held back by fear of failure; old patterns of behavior and other life accumulations. Bottom line: if you have interests and talents, pursue them! It’s not always easy and can be daunting. But you know what? You can do it! And you should.
Regarding relationships – I get it. It’s been ten years, you have mutual friends, everyone knows you as a couple. So what?! Is cheating better just to get a bit of emotion and a dopamine hit because your relationship offers you nothing but complacency and habit? Yes, it’s difficult to find someone with whom you are super compatible. But you know what? Being single is fine and much better than being in an unfulfilling relationship. As much as I like being in a relationship (I have been single for a long time though), I wouldn’t trade being happily single for an unsatisfying relationship.
‘Staying for the kids’ is no exception; it’s an excuse. What kind of relationship are you modeling for your kids? The only caveat is to separate amicably and remain amicable. There’s much more on that in my book: Single, and Too Tired to Mingle. On Relationships – With Ourselves, Our Exes, Our Kids, and Other Important Beings.
What do I want my legacy to be? That I lived fearlessly on my own terms. Not selfishly, but without succumbing to others’ expectations of how I should live my life. Just because I fancied studying science doesn’t mean I don’t have other interests. And just because I didn’t complain doesn’t mean that raising my two sons as the main caregiver was easy. It wasn’t, but every single parent knows that. You have to push forward no matter what because your children depend on you, and you have to deliver. You need to be fearless.
It hasn’t always been easy, but it has been worth it.
Coco, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
For those who may not have read about me before, let me introduce myself. My career (and life!) path has been somewhat colorful and definitely not linear. I started out studying farming, then moved on to a PhD in psychiatric genetics, focusing on the genetics of anorexia and bulimia. Part of my PhD work was conducted at King’s College in London, where I met the father of my children.
When my boys were quite young, aged 6 and 4, I decided I could no longer be with my partner. He’s a nice guy and a good dad, but I just wasn’t feeling like myself anymore. While we have always remained friends, the kids stayed with me, and I took on the majority of their upbringing. Despite the brutal challenge of raising two kids and working full-time, I managed to also move to London and, after a year, finally found work. I transitioned into coaching tennis and managing tennis venues, as that was the only thing that brought joy into my life. Despite everyone around me thinking I was nuts!
In the beginning of 2023, I was having brunch with a friend. She suggested I start a podcast because she found my life stories funny. We couldn’t find a mutual time to do it, and since I didn’t want to do it alone due to my lack of experience, I decided to write a book instead. My friend laughed at the idea, given my busy schedule, but I was determined. I started writing during my commutes to work on the tube, crafting chapter titles and the first 30 or so pages on my phone.
I began writing my book in April 2023. My friend would call and ask about my progress, laughing each time I updated her on the number of pages I had written.
After I reached about 70 pages, she stopped laughing and stopped asking. By December that same year, I published my autobiography, “Single, and Too Tired to Mingle,” with the subtitle “On Relationships: With Ourselves, Our Exes, Our Kids, and Other Important Beings.” The book discusses single parenting and my career changes, with the last chapter dedicated to the favourite men in my life. It’s not just an autobiography but also includes research and self-analysis sections at the end of each chapter. It’s a fun and informative read that lets everyone know they are not alone in their struggles, and that there is light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.
Just after publishing the book, I treated myself to a phenomenal holiday in LA. There, I met up with a friend who suggested we start a dating agency and TV show together. While I wasn’t interested in starting a dating agency, the idea of a talk show sounded fun. Although she backed off, I decided to pursue it on my own, and that’s how “The Coco Novak Show” on YouTube was born. I find, pre-interview, and interview interesting guests on the topic of relationships. The channel is growing fast, with 13k followers in three months. My sons were impressed (and dare I say proud) of how well the show is doing, which I find sweet.
On the back of my book and show, I have now launched two webinars/workshops. The first, “Single, and Too Tired to Mingle,” is for single parents. The second, “Fearless!,” is for those who are afraid of moving forward in their lives due to a fear of failure. As the webinars are online, global access is possible. Each session will have a maximum of 10 participants to ensure a focused and effective experience. Everyone will have the option to join the network, where they can keep in contact, spur each other on, and share success stories. The overriding motto is: No one is an island – we are all here for each other.
I am also a public speaker on the topic of Fearless! There should be no such thing as fear of failure. You got this!
To sum up, my journey has been unconventional but fulfilling. From studying farming to psychiatric genetics, transitioning to tennis coaching, writing a book, and now hosting a YouTube show and webinars, I strive to bring inspiration and support to others. I am most proud of my resilience and the positive impact my work has on my audience. My goal is to let potential clients, followers, and fans know that no matter the struggles they face, there is always a way forward, and we are all in this together.
The webinars are found on my website: coconovak.com.
Any fun sales or marketing stories?
Back when I owned my high-end baby store, we sold everything you needed for a baby: strollers, car seats, toys, designer baby clothes, and more. I was the exclusive importer for two major stroller brands. One of these brands was a mid-range, extremely popular line because the strollers were easy to fold and perfect for quick in-and-out car trips.
The manufacturer had 1,000 strollers left from the previous year’s collection and was offering them at a significantly discounted rate. I struck a deal with one of the country’s largest retailers to purchase the strollers from me. They only needed to sell about two strollers per store to clear the inventory. We agreed on a price, but the contract came with a caveat: if they didn’t sell all the strollers, we had to take them back.
As a novice entrepreneur and an optimistic person, I thought, “How could they not sell two strollers per store? They will be in the weekly newsletters, available at a discount, etc.” However, a few weeks in, I started receiving phone calls from people asking if the strollers the retailer was selling were real or knock-offs because the price was so low.
When the contractual period ended, headquarters called to inform me that we needed to prepare to receive the unsold strollers—nearly all of them. I had to hire a storage unit, and the strollers were stacked to the ceiling.
My then-partner (personal, not business partner) observed the situation for a while and, a few weeks later, asked if I was making any progress in selling the strollers. I think I went into full denial mode or my brain just blocked the issue out. I wasn’t tackling the problem, which was unusual for me because I’m typically very proactive. My partner couldn’t believe I was ignoring the issue.
Kudos to him, he took action and found a Russian retailer interested in the products, as the brand wasn’t selling in the Russian market. Once he made contact and they showed interest, I took over, arranged the sale and transport, and resolved the situation.
The moral of the story: never, ever agree to take any product back. Why? Because the retailer has no vested interest in selling it since they bear zero risk. It’s really tempting to go for these deals when you’re starting out and think it’s your ticket to big money, but I cannot stress enough that you should not entertain this idea. It’s a hard no from me!
How do you keep your team’s morale high?
I think every entrepreneur finds managing a team challenging. It is a challenge because we are managing different characters, motivations, and life backgrounds. At the same time, everyone’s vision has to be aligned, and we need to do what’s best for the business. Right? Probably not.
What I have found is that people will work for you. The business is secondary. If you are inspiring as a person and they buy into your vision, your team will work for you. I try not to micromanage because I hate being micromanaged. A team member once asked me, “Are you doing this because you are used to it or because you don’t trust me?” I backed off immediately and didn’t interfere with her work again.
In my experience, the best way to keep a happy and motivated team is to notice when they are doing well and praise them. Acknowledging jobs that are well done or when someone goes out of their way for you and the business is crucial. As soon as people start feeling they are taken for granted, their work becomes just … work.
Sometimes you are so blinded by the million issues per second you have as an entrepreneur that you forget the team’s problems are also yours. You need to listen to them and be understanding, even if you find their issues banal compared to yours. Is their cat sick? Yes, you have to listen and be sympathetic.
Essentially, you are kind of like their parent who also needs to pay their wages (and yours!), keep the company afloat, make your family happy, and sometimes try to do something for yourself too! It’s a balancing act, for sure. And not for the faint hearted.
I have high standards and expectations but try to be hands-off. I have a rule that if there is an issue or they have messed something up, I need to know immediately. If so, there will be no consequences. I will find out anyway, and when I find out on my own, there will be consequences.
Another principle I stand by is if someone wants to leave, let them. I only want people to stay if they want to stay. The minute you’re not enjoying what you do at my company, I am happy for you to move elsewhere because things just go downhill when you lose your motivation to do your best.
Team work makes the dream work :)
Contact Info:
- Website: https://coconovak.com
- Instagram: coconovak_author
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/coconovak.author
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mojcagabrovsek/
- Twitter: https://www.instagram.com/coconovak_author
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@CoCoNovak
- Other: Spotify – podcasts: The Coco Novak show. On relationships.
https://rss.com/podcasts/coconovak
Image Credits
Photographer: Silvina Barredo Photography, Wimbledon, London (photos 1,2,4,6,8)
Personal archive: photos 3,4,6