Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Claudia Chan. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Alright, Claudia thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Was there a defining moment in your professional career? A moment that changed the trajectory of your career?
Looking back from where I am now, I would say that there were 3 events that impacted my life.
The first happened when I was in highschool. It was a cold and grey winter morning, I did not want to get out of bed. My mom tried to get me up while I hid under the cover. She said, “Life is like this! You study hard, get a job, work hard, and that’s life…” Upon hearing this, I was bummed out! I thought, “This can’t be all there is to life?!” Since then, I became obsessed with finding meaning in my life.
The second moment happened while I was dating my now husband. My parents and I fought a lot over those few years. One night in 2015, these words came at me like arrows, “If you love mom, then choose to let go of the relationship!” I fought between feeling guilty for disappointing my mom, feeling resentful for needing to give up my desire to please someone else, and feeling scared of the unknown. Through this, I learned to choose and trust myself.
The third happened right before I spoke at the Speaker Slam competition. During the 1.5 months of preparation, I became extremely sick for 1 full month. I had fever, rashes, coughs. Then it dawned on me that my body was in such a fearful state that it was trying to prevent me from showing up. I had to acknowledge my fear, work through it, and be compassionate with myself in order to own my voice and show up powerfully. And I am excited to share that I won 1st place for the competition!
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.
I am a Life Coach who work mostly with Asian women, where I take pride in seeing them embrace their inner strength to let go of their mom’s voice, stand for what they believe, and go after what they want in life.
It took me 7 years to get to where I am now.
As I mentioned previously, because I was obsessed with finding the meaning of life, after I got married, I started exploring different creative ideas. Within 4 years, I jumped from self-publish colouring journals, to building a calligraphy and engraving business, to coaching.
It was during my last jump that my husband said, “I always support your decisions, but you’re really good at calligraphy and engraving, it’s a shame you stop pursing it.”
I wondered about it too. It felt right in my body, yet I wasn’t sure if I was doing the right thing. Am I really searching for my passion? Or am I just someone who keeps starting things and not finish them?
Then one day, it clicked: the jumps happened whenever it was time for me to promote myself.
I was too scared to show up for me because I was scared of what my mom would think!
As a Chinese girl who was born in Hong Kong and moved to Canada when I was 11, my mom had a very big influence on me. I saw how much she had given up to raise me and give me the best opportunity in life. And all she asked was for me to work hard, and stay safe to live the rest of my life.
Promoting myself meant I had to put myself out there to be judged by people. I was very concerned about what if I fail, what would other people think about me. And more specifically, what would my mom think about me?
To overcome this, I had to be really honest with what I want, and then learn to build my own safe space to support myself no matter what happens.
I also had to find people to support me.
If other people are to laugh at me, I have my back.
If other people are to reject me, I have my tribe to lean on.
And this was what helped me work through my fear prior to competing on Speaker Slam.
This is why I offer coaching programs for Asian women. Because I want to help guide them through the journey of getting away from their mom’s grips. We sometimes don’t realize how deeply we’re influenced by our moms, and it stops us from going after our goals and dreams. I want them to build up their own power to stand their ground, so that they can live how they want, even if their moms walk out on them.
If you feel called to go on this journey, I’d like to invite you to find someone to walk alongside you. This journey can be challenging and lonely sometimes.
If you’re looking for a coach, make sure you find someone who understands you, who can meet you where you’re at, and make you feel safe to be open and honest.
We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?
One of the lessons I had to unlearn, is to stop relying on other people to validate me. I have to be the one to love and support me even when I fail
After I took my first speaking program, I was invited by my coach to speak in Paris. I was really excited about that. I had my speech ready, and I felt really good about it.
Once I got on stage, I shared my story with the audience. I thought, I got this! And transitioned to my first teaching point…. then Blank!
I couldn’t remember what I was supposed to say! I kept my cool on the outside, and made fun of myself. But deep inside, I was in a panic! At one point, I even thought, “Could I get off the stage to look at my notes? Oh wait.. my phone is recording my speech, and my notes are in it…!”
About a minute later, I gathered myself and got through the rest of my speech. I was glad I survived! I even got a standing ovation! But once I saw my coach’s face, disappointment hit me like a Mac truck!
She was proud of me during the program. And I desperately wanted her to be proud of me at the speaking event. And I failed her, I failed myself.
That night, I ugly cried in my hotel, realizing how much I wanted to nail the speech because I was craving for that external approval to validate my worth. If I did well, it meant I’m smart and I have what it takes…
After crying, I finally understand the true meaning of, “loving myself and having my own back even when I fail”.
I am proud that I put myself out there and failed. I don’t need other people to be proud of me, I am proud of myself.
And I am so grateful for this experience!
Have any books or other resources had a big impact on you?
There are a few people that had changed my life.
When I first went on my business journey, I signed up for a few business programs. However, I couldn’t seem to be able to follow and succeed. But when I met my coach, Simone Grace Seol, everything started making sense to me. That’s because she teaches us how to go back into our own bodies and trust ourselves. What works for one person may not work for others. And it is through trusting myself that I could build a business that is in alignment with my own body. You can find her on Instagram @simone.grace.seol
The second person who changed my life is David Bedrick. He focuses on unshaming ourselves. For example, if I procrastinate, the first reaction I’d have is to think that something’s wrong with me, and I’d try to figure out what I can do to move myself along. Unshaming means to look at procrastination from a different angle, what if I’m procrastinating because my body has a deeper message to tell me? To unshame is to uncover the deeper meaning why we do what we do, without judgement. This gave me a gateway to learn more about myself and my clients. If you’d like to learn more about this, I highly recommend Simone Seol’s interview with David Bedrick, you can find it on her “I’m Your Korean Mom” podcast, episodes 207 and 208.
The last person who changed my life is Lisa Nichols, I took her speaking program because I wanted to gain better skills when it comes to crafting a better speech. Lisa is truly a master at speaking. In the program, she broke down all the techniques into bitesize understandable pieces. And it was after taking this program that I gained the belief that I have what it takes to enter a speaking competition. To which I did and won! You can find one of her YouTube videos called “Top Tips For Becoming a Powerful Speaker”.
I invite you to check out all of them if you get a chance!
Last but no least, I want to say that it took me a while to get to where I am now, I even doubted whether I would even make it! And now that I’m here, I’m excited about where I’m going next. I know that sometimes, we may think that we are stuck, and there’s no way it’s possible for it to happen to us! Have you ever felt like everything is just happening to you? That there is no way you can make it to the other side? But what if, what if it is possible?
I believe in you. You are special and worth fighting for. So let’s SHINE, because you’re meant for more!
Contact Info:
- Website: https://claudiachan.co/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/claudiachan.co/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/claudiachan.co
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/claudia-chan-coaching/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeZho2GLxZs3afqSq4SrPzQ
- Other: Link to the video of my winning speech: https://youtu.be/rogwBu0U3oY Link to my book: Asian Women Trailblazers Who BossUp https://claudiachan.co/product/asian-trailblazers-boss-up/
Image Credits
Only photos from Speaker Slam are by Philip Zave.