We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Chanel Brenner a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Chanel, thanks for joining us today. Did you always know you wanted to pursue a creative or artistic career? When did you first know?

I started writing poetry when my older son, Riley, died of a brain AVM hemorrhage at age six. The night he died, standing in my kitchen, I heard a voice in my head say, write. Instead of screaming and pulling my hair out, I sat down at my computer and started to write a poem. It was only the fifth poem I had ever written. It wasn’t good, but writing it was—the act of creating instead of destroying.

Writing and sharing my poetry became a lifeline. I wrote poems at stoplights in the car, at the grocery store, waiting in line at the post office. Instead of crying, I wrote a lot of poems. Writing helped me process stimuli that triggered my grief.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

My first book, Vanilla Milk: a memoir told in poems, was published in 2013 by a small press here in Los Angeles called Silver Birch. It’s a collection of poems and prose pieces I wrote all in the first two years of grief.

My second book, Smile, or Else, was published in 2021 by Press 53. It’s a collection of poetry I wrote after those first two years in ongoing grief. It won the 2021 Press 53 award for poetry.

Through the years, people have told me how powerful my writing is, but that they can’t write like me. I disagree. I believe everyone can write (maybe even better than I can!) and benefit from the healthy effects.

I’ve felt a calling to share my experience with grief and writing. Grief is so isolating, and I want to help people feel less alone and more hopeful. When we think and write about our person who died, we tune into their energy…regardless of religious beliefs.

I offer one-on-one grief support in person and on Zoom. In these sessions, I provide a prompt for inspiring in-session writing and then you share what you’ve written if you are comfortable doing so. This kind of creative work helps us process pain and sadness and in many aspects it mirrors the work of mourning. It helps us continue a connection with our person that died.

Looking back, are there any resources you wish you knew about earlier in your creative journey?

I wish I had known more about grief resources when Riley died, and I started writing about the loss. We tried to find a grief support group, but we were turned away by an organization who told us that losing a six-year-old was very rare and there weren’t any groups available for us…only ones for infant and teenage losses. Years later, we discovered that there was another organization just six miles away from us with groups for child loss we could have joined!

In the throes of grief, while still caretaking for our younger son, Desmond, it was challenging to know what we needed and to find the time to research.

I wish I had known that my nervous system was in fight or flight and that was why I was having difficulty breathing. I remember struggling to get through a book I was reading aloud to Desmond at bedtime because I was so short of breath. I went to doctors and was told that nothing was wrong with me but not given any advice about what to do. I wish I had known about energy healing like Reiki and sound baths and had discovered somatic work and EMDR earlier. They all would have been helpful along with the healing benefits of writing. Also, breathwork and guided meditations would have helped ground me and supported my writing. When I am in my body, writing is more fluid, and I connect with myself and Riley with ease. Grief journeys are multifaceted and there isn’t just one modality that will help us through it.

What do you think is the goal or mission that drives your creative journey?

My overriding mission is connection. I want to connect with people in grief and share the healing effects of writing. I am twelve years into my loss and want to utilize my experience to support others with their journeys. I hope to inspire and encourage with writing prompts and intuitive guidance. Also, it is important to me to continue a connection with Riley and keep his spirit alive through creativity and self-growth.

Contact Info:

• Website: chanelbrenner.com
• Instagram: @chanelbrenner
• Facebook: @chanelbrennerauthor
• Linkedin: chanelbrenner
• Twitter: @chanelb2

Image Credits
Author photo: Kate Haus Photograpy