We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Carmen Ward a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Carmen, appreciate you joining us today. Day to day the world can seem like a tough place, but there’s also so much kindness in the world and we think talking about that kindness helps spread it and make the world a nicer, kinder place. Can you share a story of a time when someone did something really kind for you?
I was going through one of the most difficult times in my life, and I was spiraling. I was lost, I had lost my job, and I had no hope. In the deepest depression I had ever experienced before, I was struggling to find the meaning of it all. However, a friend, Renee Racette, asked me to wait, just a few months: there was an opportunity for me in the initial cohort of the nonprofit Rung for Women program, which she was a founding partner in. I applied to the program and held on just a little longer; now, I’m thankful that I did. Rung provided me with resources I needed to succeed, including basic healthcare on campus and therapy. This led me to realize there was no shame in mental health, and most importantly, that I had worth. Before that moment, I had never been valued, but Rung gave me permission (and hope) to dream about something bigger than myself, to embrace my strengths and leverage them to create something I now knew had value. In launching BecomingCarmen, I was launching myself: while I created the concept to help entrepreneurs, I necessarily had to launch myself as an entrepreneur.
As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?
I created my industry, my space, and my service. Originally, I got into this industry because I felt as though I was unsupported, and that there were no resources available to me. It seemed like many people were traditionally siloed out, rather than being integrated into existing support systems. Mental and physical health struggles were devastating and resulted in exclusion, rather than increased support. It was important to me to create the systems and infrastructure that would allow people to live their best dreams. My system allows us to meet people where they are and help to create the opportunities and value specific to their lifetime, not confining them to traditional structures. These traditional institutions are only ever designed for a small majority to access; anything I was going to create needed to be for everybody. BecomingCarmen will help anybody, but it was specifically designed to help people who have been discarded by larger systems: to take them out of the trash and say, “You have worth. You are priceless. You are a commodity.” We are constantly becoming our best selves, evolving and redefining what we need out of life. I see this as fundamentally entrepreneurial: we are all developing ourselves, just like we would a business.
What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?
I had to unlearn everything that I was taught, from birth to adulthood. Structures and systems created in nonprofit and corporate America were not designed for me. I had learned there were proscribed methods of being seen, heard, and valued, but I still struggled to practice them. I was held in bondage by the lofty expectations of parents, community members, and broader society—even as they convinced me I was worth nothing, and would amount to nothing. What I learned instead was how to be authentic. I learned how to be powerful by shedding the closed, limiting expectations of others and living for what motivated me intrinsically.
Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?
Two years ago, I made the decision to establish BecomingCarmen LLC, on the heels of my son with special needs graduating high school. Prior to this, I had surrendered my entire life to the idea of being a full-time single mom, but two years ago I started to entertain the idea that putting myself first was the best thing I could do for my son. If an airplane is experiencing oxygen loss, the first rule in the emergency instructions is to mask yourself first, before children or others needing help. The logic behind this is simple: you can only continue to mask others when you have air to breathe yourself. Every day, I make steps towards my goals, and show my son and the dreamers connected to me that dreams are possible. However, by surrounding myself with other resilient, rebellious dreamers, I have made what seemed impossible, possible. On September 30th, I will be holding my first paid event as a speaker, and contrary to what I’d been told my whole life, people are signing up. Anything is possible.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.becomingcarmenllc.com
- Instagram: www.instagram.com/becomingcarmenllc
- Facebook: www.facebook.com/BECOMINGCARMEN/
- Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/carmen-ward-9112020
- Twitter: @Jeremiah_Selah
- Youtube: #becomingcarmen
- Other: Medium publication: https://medium.com/becomingcarmen-dynamically-transforming-trailblaze
Image Credits
Tracy Jane Weidel Photography (white jacket photos)