We were lucky to catch up with Cait Donovan recently and have shared our conversation below.

Cait, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. We’d love to hear the story behind how you got your first job in field that you currently practice in.

Before I was attempting to become a speaker, my first paid gig (in 2009!) came through a friend who needed someone to present on stress management in English (I was living in Poland at the time). When I moved back to the States in 2019, I knew I wanted to jump wholeheartedly into speaking and really dove in. I even went so far as to create my own event – I knew I wouldn’t get paid, but at least I’d be getting out there! I set up the event, made an Eventbrite page, prepared, rented out a space, even ordered catering. I sold exactly ZERO tickets.

BUT!

There was a local conference looking for a burnout speaker and they found that very same Eventbrite page when they were googling for burnout speakers and ended up hiring me for their event. One of my biggest initial failures turned into my first real speaking gig in the US!

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

I am an 80’s baby who was taught that if she followed her heart, she’d get the life she desired – and I WENT for it. I dropped out of a pre-med program and moved to California for a masters in Chinese medicine. I met my future husband while traveling through Argentina, got engaged within 6 weeks, and moved to Europe to start our lives together. I was the first acupuncturist in a fertility center in all of Poland, and my first solo practice that I opened after leaving the fertility center was a huge success.

On paper, I had everything.

My body, however, was crumbling.

I was on the train to burnout town for MANY years before I realized what was happening. Once my eyes were opened, I went down rabbit holes attempting to ‘fix’ myself. I couldn’t understand how someone who was so clued into her ‘why’ and took so many big risks to follow her heart could have ended up here. Underneath the perfect surface, I found a storm of expectations, self worth issues, internalized cultural ideals that didn’t match my own, and a deep fear that I wasn’t worthy of love, or friendship, or even being liked.

This lead me to both a deep internal reckoning (it took a couple of years) and another degree in Biobehavioral health. I wanted to understand myself and I also wanted to understand how this happens to others. During this time, I wrote a book on the topic, started a podcast, and grew my speaking career. In addition to speaking, my business offers both group and 1:1 coaching for burnt out professionals.

A few things set the way I work apart from others.
1. I believe gratitude is useful, but not when you’re in the depths of burnout. There’s some brain science to support this and it lead to the creation of The Resentment Journal – a tool that teaches you how to transform resentment into boundaries and self-nourishment.
2. I don’t believe that burnout prevention is entirely useful. I know that companies should put more effort into reducing burnout vulnerability in their workplaces but the focus on burnout prevention is short sighted. A large majority of us that end up burnt out would have ended up here regardless. Our bosses could have lessened our workload and we would have picked up extra anyway, or made sure we were over-giving at home or as a volunteer. Our brains often have a dampened sense of interoception which would have clued us in to the signs of burnout before they were glaring wildfires.
3. I don’t want to eliminate your perfectionism, people pleasing, lack of boundaries, etc. I fully recognize that your coping mechanisms have worked for you for a very long time – and they might have turned into habits and you *might* be using them where they aren’t super useful. BUT – demonizing them (or you!) isn’t useful and isn’t the best way to take advantage of your strengths. We focus on intentionality over ‘fixing’.
4. Moving into exploration and explanation of where burnout truly comes from is my favorite way to help people drop any blame and shame (of self or others!) related to their burnout stories. I truly believe that when we get kinder and more objective, healing is easier.

I am most proud of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast. FRIED, 5 years in, is a top 1% podcast globally and we reach over 20,000 people a month, globally. I don’t want to sound morbid, but if I died tomorrow, I would be happy that I created a solace for people that I left behind.

Training and knowledge matter of course, but beyond that what do you think matters most in terms of succeeding in your field?

Stick-to-it-ness. As a speaker, the time you’re going to build your business is likely to be years and if you give up before you get there, you never get to taste the glory of making it. I think that currently, we are accustomed to quick wins and quick dopamine fixes and we have lost sight that some things simply take an amazingly long string of small, consistent steps. That being said, you have to have a way of assessing whether you should quit or grit, it’s an important skill to help you avoid burnout. Your boundaries for quitting or gritting will likely change at different points in your business (and life!) journey, but being able to sit down and assess where you’re at regularly is a critical part of the journey.

Can you tell us about a time you’ve had to pivot?

When we landed back in the States, I was ready to open a new acupuncture practice and build a speaking career simultaneously. I spent about 5 weeks finding us a place to live, buying furniture, unpacking our things when they arrived from Europe – all while my partner was busy working at his new role in the company that moved us here. I was JUST about ready to put things in motion when I ruptured my achilles in a kickboxing class – or rather, when I was attempting to do a round-off as if I was still a gymnast after the kickboxing class ended.

The subsequent surgery, recovery time, and physical therapy meant that I wasn’t able to walk normally for months – and I especially wasn’t able to stand and see patients all day after walking to and taking the train into NYC to my office. In addition, we weren’t in a financial position for me to be able to simply not work. I went to bed one night, tears pouring down my face and onto my pillow – I begged my ancestors to give me a sign, to show me what to do, to show me how to use this time wisely.

The next morning, I woke up and the words: FRIED. The Ultimate Guide to Burnout Podcast were ticker taping across my forehead. The name has since shortened, but the podcast was the foundation of my coaching and speaking careers. Sometimes, especially in moments of high crisis, listening is your best skill!

Contact Info:

• Website: https://caitdonovan.com
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/caitdonovanspeaks
• Facebook: https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast
• Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/caitdonovanspeaks
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiSE-b_zLpPyRh_A_JWGrow
• Other: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fried-the-burnout-podcast/id1469939920
  https://open.spotify.com/show/2VhzgpY24d6xDhxPLGn9Ex?si=ba8048daaa1042f9

Image Credits

John DeMato, Robin Reynolds