Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to BonnieRuth Rolf. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Hi BonnieRuth, thanks for joining us today. Let’s start with the story of your mission. What should we know?
My husband and I walked through 19 years of infertility. From that we discovered the lack of resources to help couples navigate how to deal with the trauma of that. It is uncharted territory on a daily basis between Dr. visits, treatments, disappointments, fears, missing out, not knowing what to do. It left us feeling helpless and unsure. We had to find ways to keep who we were as individuals and as a couple stable, steady and surrounded. It was not easy. Most days felt gut wrenching and as if we lived in a black hole. We quickly discovered that “Team Rolf” us together was the only way we could get through the darkness. At varying times one of us was stronger than the other and we could lift the other up. Most days we were side by side, one step at a time, one decision at a time, one dream, one disappointment at a time, TOGETHER!
Infertility can tell you, you are failing on the daily. It beats you down with the unknowns and takes your heart for a tailspin of emotions. We spent years trying to find answers, decide what was best for us. Then in 2020, yup in the middle of a pandemic, due to my chronic health issues hitting an all time high, we decided for my quality of life and for the sake of our sanity, I would have a hysterectomy. It is not a decision we wanted to make or that was made lightly. It was time, my body had bullied me long enough. With that decision we moved into a permanent state of a childless journey. I say permanent cause ultimately we had been living that life for 19 years. Our circumstances forced us to have to make the dreaded decision our entire married life we had been fighting against. We decided though that TOGETHER was our approach to the battle and TOGETHER we would walk into a path of new dreams and purpose. It has taken several years of grieving and healing to come to the place we are today. We have a podcast called Barren Not Broken and we are now getting ready to build a place for couples to come and refreshed, restored and healed from the trauma that infertility, TTC, Childlessness not by choice can bring.
We have sold our home and bought 48 acres in TX, our own little piece of Texas. We are beginning to build Legacy Place. It is where we hope to reshape our own legacy and help other couples discover how they can build theirs from a stance of healing and not brokenness. We want others to know that no matter the barren places in our lives, that we do not have to live broken.
Legacy place will be full of cabins providing a space for peaceful moments to heal. Once we are done building the cabins will be short term rentals to fund available nights where couples walking through infertility can come for free to stay and enjoy rest and nature.
We may not have a blood line to define our legacy but we hope to have a community that inspires others to see past what we do not have and live a thriving life that is full and purposeful. Legacy Place will be an environment where couples can come and find their rhythm to thrive and not just survive.
My husband Jason and I definitely are living a story we never thought would be our reality but we also are living a life that is fulfilling and we hope it inspires others to live their best lives no matter what the unexpecteds are.
BonnieRuth, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
My name is BonnieRuth and my friends call me BR. I have been married to my husband Jason for 21 years. We spent 19 of those years battling infertility and I had chronic health issues that contributed. We discovered very quickly how hard on a marriage this battle was. We determined early on that we would fight as hard for our marriage as we did to try and build our family. Many years later we now are very proud to say that the greatest gift in our lives is our marriage. It is NOT perfect by any means, we LOVE counseling otherwise we would never have survived what we have been through. This crazy journey of ours has sparked a passion within us to help couples not just survive but to thrive in spite of the trauma and devastation that infertility and childlessness not by choice can cause. We started with a podcast called Barren Not Broken. Now we are in the process of building a retreat center for couples who have walked through what we have. It is a place where couples can come stay and be renewed and just get away from the chaos. We are also currently working on a devotional for couples walking through infertility or childlessness. The 48 acres we have purchased and are calling Legacy Place will have cabins and various environments that foster rest, peace and healing. The cabins will be short term rentals part of the month to fund the other half of the month to bring couples out to the property who need to get away from the crazy at no cost.
The thing I am most proud of is that even in the midst of pain,sorrow, of questions and disappointment I found that relationships are everything. I am proud that Ie chosen to not walk this crazy journey alone. We want Legacy Place and Barren Not Broken podcast to be a space and environment where couples feel comfortable to connect and not do this alone.
We want couples to see hope in the midst of all they are going through. We long to see couples choose each other even in the midst of loss. We will do whatever we can to provide a safe place for them to find their way through what seems overwhelming and impossible.
We’d love to hear about how you keep in touch with clients.
I think this is vital to creating longevity. Relationships matter over everything. It is how we approach people and their felt needs that will bring long term connection and loyalty. I value personal touch with authenticity in everything I do and say. We can never underestimate finding out how someone prefers to be communicated with. It empowers us to bring a personal approach to the professional relationship. Maybe it is sending a card after a phone meeting, or sensing an email to follow up, or it could be a DM that becomes an opportunity to meet and build longevity with that client. Brand loyalty in my opinion is all about being you! Everything you say, do, post, communicate is authentically you. If it does not represent you and you operate from that relationship perspective as mentioned above then the client will know if it is not authentically you or not. Keep on mission, on target of reaching the demographic of people you want to reach. I have to remember that no matter I am here to reach women and couples who are walking through infertility and childlessness. Even in that community there are so many lanes to run in, but I have to run in my lane and stay true to the message I am trying to convey. For me it is helping bridge the gap between family, friendship and femininity.
How do you keep your team’s morale high?
Team is the key word in this question. I am a strong believer that vision shared on a continual basis will shape the why for someone to be on your team and successfully execute the mission. I am passionate about rallying others around the cause, giving them the opportunity to see the bigger picture and find their place in it. It isn’t just about them having ownership or or me delegating to them, rather it is about the fact that we have all caught the vision, run passionalty together towards the goal and empower, encourage and inspire each other as we execute and make it happen. I want to see people who come alongside the vision and together we get through the struggles, the wins and the adventure of what is next!
Contact Info:
- Website: barrennotbroken.com
- Instagram: @barrennotbroken
- Facebook: @barrennotbrokenpodcast
- Other: https://barrennotbroken.podbean.com/ https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/barren-not-broken/id1503439090
Image Credits
@cherece.casale