We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Bonnie Artman Fox a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Bonnie, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Do you think your parents have had a meaningful impact on you and your journey?

Thank you for the opportunity to participate in a conversation with you.

Yes, my parents have had a meaningful impact on me and my professional journey.

I grew up in a small Midwest farming community. Both of my parents modeled a strong sense of family, work ethic, and the importance of keeping your word. My dad used to say, “I don’t need to sign contracts. When I give people my word, I do what I say I’d do”. And he did.

My dad was a superintendent in an underground construction company, which meant he worked year-round in every kind of weather. From the heat of the summer to the brutal cold and snow in the winter, he showed up for work every day.

Some of the jobs he and his crew worked on were dangerous and challenging to complete. Some nights, Dad couldn’t sleep because he was worried about keeping his crew safe. It was important to him to never ask people to do something he wouldn’t do.

Over the years, I met people who worked for my dad. On more than one occasion, people told me how much they trusted him because they knew when he was in charge, the job would get done right and everyone would go home at the end of the day in one piece.

Dad is now in his mid-80s, and people who worked for him still visit him to this day, sharing stories of how much they enjoyed working for him.

My mom was a beautician. Her beauty shop was in our home. I remember sitting at the kitchen table after school doing my homework and seeing her walk into the kitchen to stir dinner on the stove. After literally “stirring the pot,” she’d immediately return to work in the beauty shop to put curlers in one of her client’s hair.

Mom was so beloved by her clients that when they approached their last days, she was often asked to fix their hair after they died for the memorial service. When she received notice that a client had passed, she kept her word, and off she went to the funeral home to honor her commitment.

Bonnie, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

I am privileged to have had a lifelong career of investing in people’s lives, helping individuals who are struggling with personal or professional issues to work through and overcome the roadblocks in their lives that are holding them back from achieving success.

Prior to becoming an executive leadership coach, I was a psychiatric nurse and Licensed Family Therapist. I felt a profound sense of meaning and purpose when I counseled couples on the verge of divorce and families in crisis to change relationship patterns.

While working in the field of addiction, I had a boss who was very difficult to work for. On a regular basis, he yelled, had anger outbursts, and made condescending comments if something didn’t go as planned. As a staff, we walked on eggshells, never knowing who the next target would be.

To say working in this kind of environment was stressful is an understatement.

Instead of leaving, I went to therapy. I felt compelled to seek out effective ways to navigate the leader’s unpredictability because I loved my actual job. I also knew if I left, I’d take me with me. I wanted to learn from this experience and not run away from an opportunity to grow.

My therapy sessions gave me clarity and insight into the ways my family dynamics and upbringing were creeping into my office. And as much as I love my parents and appreciate all they’ve done for me, I learned we didn’t have the skills to work through conflict as a family. I could see that differences were often not talked about. When there was tension, I became the family peacemaker to smooth over the upset.

Gaining self-awareness and developing emotional intelligence skills to change my conflict tendencies equipped me to apply what I learned to my workplace and successfully navigate through the challenges of working under the direction of my difficult boss.

Eventually I was offered another position within the same company and went on to work with a fabulous boss who I’m still in touch with.

My family background and work experiences give context to the purpose of my work today – guiding leaders to replace abrasive behavior with emotional intelligence.

Having worked for an abrasive leader early in my career gave me a deep understanding of the suffering employees go through. By making the conscious choice to work on my personal development, I gained insight and perspective of how all of us learn ways to self-protect that carry over into all aspects of our lives.

From people-pleasing to perfectionism to abrasive behavior, we all have a story behind what drives our behavior. The good news is self-protective, unhealthy ways of responding can be changed.

That’s what I help leaders do through my coaching and speaking programs today.

What I’m most proud of from my work is the positive ripple effect on the workplace, employees, and families when leaders turn around abrasive behavior.

Not only does the leader change, workplaces become healthy, employee suffering ends, and families no longer see their loved ones dealing with the stress of a boss who bullies.

The positive ripple effect of my work has a generational impact on a leader’s family and work relationships, which is the premise of my book How Did My Family Get In My Office?!

Have you ever had to pivot?

Yes, and it was a huge learning curve in marketing and business development when I pivoted my career from being a therapist to an executive leadership coach.

As a therapist, I primarily received clients through insurance panels. While I promote my practice online and through local speaking programs, marketing wasn’t a focus.

I quickly learned the difference between working “in” my business and working “on” my business.

I was naturally drawn to working in my business by providing direct client services through coaching and training programs. I realized that promoting my services required skills that didn’t come naturally to me.

Gratefully, I found professional organizations to learn how to develop the skills I lacked.

By attending conferences, I gained clarity on my target audience, services, and how to streamline business operations. Through these organizations I sought out like-minded entrepreneurs. Developing these relationships led to mutually sharing business practices and supporting each other’s business development.

Another key aspect of pivoting my career transition from therapy to coaching was receiving my own business coaching.

I wouldn’t be where I am today without the support and guidance of others with the expertise to fill the gaps I lacked and develop the niche of coaching abrasive leaders.

What do you think helped you build your reputation within your market?

Three intentional choices helped me build my reputation within my market.

The first goes back to what my parents modeled to me – Keep my promises.

Building a positive reputation is about delivering results and creating memorable experiences by how I treat people. Honoring commitments is fundamental in holding myself accountable for achieving results and a positive client experience.

Secondly, sharing my experiences of working for an abrasive leader has helped build my reputation.

Through my transparency, my clients know I ‘get’ what their employees are going through and the constant strain on them of putting out fires from the aftermath of a leader’s abrasive behavior.

My vulnerability has helped employers recognize their responsibility to hold leaders accountable for respectful and professional behavior and build trust that I can help them.

Thirdly, becoming an Accredited Boss Whisperer® through the Boss Whispering® Institute. The Boss Whispering® coaching process is a cornerstone of my client work.

As an Accredited Boss Whisperer®, I guide leaders through a proven process of transforming abrasive behaviors with tact, empathy, and consideration of others. The method has an 82% success rate of leaders turning around negative perceptions about their leadership style.

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos has said, “A brand for a company is like a reputation for a person. You earn a reputation by trying to do hard things well.”

Working with leaders who exhibit abrasive behavior is hard work. While professionally competent, these leaders often don’t recognize the negative impact of their words and actions on others. As such, when we first start working together, they’re not thrilled about participating in coaching.

I’ve established a highly regarded brand reputation because I view my work as a co-researcher to leaders to identify the negative perceptions about their leadership. By conveying I genuinely care about them and their success, and provide practical strategies to turn around the negative perceptions, leaders transform abrasive behaviors into emotional intelligence.

It’s such a privilege to be a part of leaders changing and bringing out humanity in the workplace. 

Contact Info:

• Website: [email protected]
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bonnieartmanfox/
• Other: https://youtube.com/@bonnieartmanfox7439?si=t6OxEZhFgbrekdc5

Image Credits
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