We recently connected with Bob Tiede and have shared our conversation below.

Bob , looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. undefined

I thought the job of a leader was to be directive – i.e. to tell his/her staff what to do. I loved my staff! I wanted the very best for them. I wanted to do everything I could to help them win.

My strategy for their development as leaders was for them to hang around me. I frequently said, “A lot more is caught than taught! If you just hang around me you will learn a lot!”

My strategy for helping them to succeed was to let them benefit from everything I knew that would help them climb the mountain successfully.

When they came to me with a problem, I gave them step-by-step instructions on how to solve it. When they came to me with an idea, I applauded them for their idea and then shared with them two or more things that would add horsepower to their plan.

When I asked them to take on a new project—if they said “Yes!”—I asked them to pull out a legal pad and I gave them step-by-step instructions on how to do it.

And when one of my staff left my office, I smiled with the thought that they were walking away so impressed with my wisdom, and so appreciative that I had given them the perfect road map to success.
I was absolutely clueless about how my “over-helpfulness” was actually making them feel.

Several years ago at the Global Leadership Summit, put on by the Willow Creek Association, I saw that one of the speakers was Liz Wiseman, speaking on:

Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter – the same title as her book.

I thought, “This is going to be great session—because she will be talking about Leaders like me!”

But I was in for a BIG SURPRISE.

Liz started by talking about “Diminishers.” And I soon realized she was talking about me! The more she shared, the lower I sank in my chair. What I had thought were “Multiplier” traits were actually “Diminisher” traits.

When you bring a “Diminisher” a problem, they not only solve it for you, but they think you will be really impressed with their wisdom and grateful for their help. But when you bring a “Multiplier” a problem, they ask you, “What do you think the solution might be?” They let you solve your own problem.

When you bring a “Diminisher” an idea, they tell you what would make your idea even better. They believe you will go away thinking, “Wow! I am so glad I asked. Those additional ideas will really improve my plan!” They do not realize that you will go away thinking, “Nothing I ever bring him/her is good enough!” But when you bring a “Multiplier” your idea they say, “Wow! Great Idea! Tell
me more!”

When a “Diminisher” asks you to take on a new project they will most often say, “Will you help me with my project?” They want to give you responsibility but no authority, and then tell you exactly how they want you to execute their project, step-by-step.

When a “Multiplier” asks you to take on a new project, they share that they have a “Leadership Development-Rich Opportunity” for you. They invite you to take on this new assignment. If you accept,
they make you the Project Director—giving you authority with responsibility. They ask you to do “Draft One” of the strategic plan to successfully execute the project. They will ask you to let them know what resources you will need to succeed and how they can help you.

THREE QUOTES:

“The leader of the past may have been a person who knew how to tell, but certainly the leader of the future will be a person who knows how to ask.”
— Dr. Peter Drucker

“When you give advice, the brain is basically asleep. If you engage them and ask questions that help them come to their own insights, it comes alive.”
— Dr. Henry Cloud

“An effective leader will ask questions instead of giving direct orders.”
— Dale Carnegie

Today, I am a recovering “Diminisher”. The temptation to “Tell” is ever present, but by an act of my will I now seek to be a “Multiplier” by choosing to “Ask” instead of “Tell”!

When a staff member comes to me with a problem I ask him/ her, “What do you think the solution might be?”
When a staff member comes to me with an idea, I say, “Wow! Great Idea! Tell me more!”
When I ask a staff member to take on a new project, I share that I have a “Leadership Development-Rich
Opportunity” for them to consider. I state that I would like them to consider becoming the “(Name of project) Director.” If they agree, I ask them to draft the “Strategic Plan.”

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

Bob Tiede (pronounced “Tee-Dee”) has been on the staff of Cru (formerly known as Campus Crusade for Christ) for 52 years – serving 8 years in Cru Campus and then 24 years as the CEO of Josh McDowell Ministry – a Division of Cru. And Now 20 years on the U.S. Leadership Development Team – developing the next generation of leaders for Cru. Bob’s blog LeadingWithQuestions.com is now in its 12th year and followed by leaders in over 200 countries. Bob has written 6 very popular books, including “Great Leaders Ask Question – a Fortune 100 List” and “Now That’s a Great Question” and his newest the third edition of “Leading With Questions.” Bob’s mission is to help leaders everywhere multiply their leadership effectiveness X10 by moving from “Let Me Tell You!” to “Let Me Ask You!” Bob has been married to Sherry for 53 years is the proud Dad of 4 adult children – all married and 8 incredible Grandchildren – all who love to ask their “Papa Bob” questions!

Leaders who lead with questions are often 10 times more effective than leaders who lead by telling!

Bob can teach anyone to Lead with Questions in 30 seconds?

Would you like to become a better listener in 8 seconds?

What are the 4 questions that one consultant uses to make a handsome six figure income?

We’d love to hear about how you met your business partner.

As you may know, all 5 of my previous books were self-published, so being the co-author of the 3rd edition of “Leading With Questions” will be my first published book-published by Wiley! Would you like to know the story of how this all came about?
The story starts in 2006 when Sherry and I went to a Borders bookstore in Orlando. Sherry loves bookstores and goes all over the store. When she is ready to go, she can always find me in the Leadership section. My normal practice is to find 3-5 leadership books I have never seen and then to find a chair where I can quickly peruse them to see if any of them are going home with me. That day I found the first edition of “Leading With Questions” by Dr. Michael Marquardt, then a professor at George Washington University. Reading only a few pages, I almost instantly said “this one I am buying!” It was a page-turner for me. I devoured it. I was on the U.S. and Global Operations Leadership Development teams and I began to teach out of it. I put together an 8 session “Leading With Questions” Seminar that was really well received by multiple Cru Ministry Teams.

In 2012, one of my colleagues had started a blog and encouraged me to start one too! I didn’t want to do just another leadership blog because there was already so many good ones. So I asked myself this question: “Is there a niche of leadership I could blog on?” Instantly I had an answer! It would be something about “Leading With Questions!” When you launch a blog, one of the first questions to answer is “What will be the name of your blog/website?” I typed in: “LeadingWithQuestions.com” thinking the author (Dr. Marquardt) or the publisher (Wiley) would have already purchased that domain. Much to my surprise, LeadingWithQuestions.com was available, so I grabbed it.

As I launched my blog, I wondered how Dr. Marquardt might feel when he found out I had launched a blog using the name of his book? So I decided to get several months of content on my blog before emailing him to share how his book had changed my leadership forever and how I had launched a blog with the name of his book. I asked if I might have his permission to excerpt from his book – of course with full attribution to him. I shared that I would include a photo of the book cover and a link to Amazon where my subscribers could purchase his book. I clicked “send” on my email and wondered how he would respond. Within 24 hours I received the most gracious email, sharing how my email had encouraged him and granting me “cart-blanche” permission to excerpt from his book.

In 2014, Dr. Marquardt was getting ready to do the second edition of “Leading With Questions” and sent me an email asking if, I would be willing to write an endorsement for the second edition and asking if he could list LeadingWithQuestions.com as a recommended resource! Wow! I responded instantly to say YES!

In the spring of 2015, we were taking a group of Cru Leaders to Washington, D.C. and I reached out ahead of time to ask Dr. Marquardt if he would be in town and if he would he be willing to come speak to our group. I also shared that I would be happy to purchase enough of the second editions to give to everyone. Dr. Marquardt said he would be delighted and he arrived an hour early so that he could sign all of the books. I got to spend that hour with him and we became friends!

In February 2022, Dr. Marquardt called me and shared that it is now time to do a Third Edition of “Leading With Questions” and he asked me if I would be willing to be his Co-Author. Wow! Willing? Absolutely Yes! I would be honored! He shared that a new edition needs approximately 25% new content and that all the new content needed had likely already been posted on my blog with “Guest Posts” from over 450 Guest Post Authors and excerpts from more than 80 books.

Last summer, we worked together for over a month determining what previous content needed to be replaced, selecting the new content from my blog and adding and editing the 3rd edition.

Are there any books, videos or other content that you feel have meaningfully impacted your thinking?

Please click this link to read my answer: https://leadingwithquestions.com/latest-news/my-top-15-leading-with-questions-books/

Contact Info:

• Website: https://LeadingWithQuestions.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/leadingwithquestions
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LeadingWithQuestions/
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bobtiede/
• Twitter: https://x.com/bobtiede