Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Bethaney Clark. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Bethaney, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Was there a moment in your career that meaningfully altered your trajectory? If so, we’d love to hear the backstory.

In 2012, my husband was diagnosed with an Auto Immune disorder. He was 29, and it completely debilitated him. He went from being extremely athletic to being unable to work, and barely able to walk upstairs. We sought out advice from both the traditional western medicine and natural medicine lines of thought, and everywhere we went, the biggest factor they had in common was “stress”.

His naturopath sat us down and told us, “You can change your diet, cut out gluten and dairy. You can take all the supplements and Probiotics you want. But unless you learn to manage your stress, this will continue to be an issue.” I was so grateful that he got us straight to the heart of things. And yet…we kept hearing that he needed to manage his stress, but no one was able to give us any practical suggestions on how to actually do that.

This created a fire in me that I didn’t realize was burning until years later. After I graduated from Massage school, I knew I wanted to specialize in the management of stress and stress related issues, like Auto Immune conditions, and Post Traumatic Stress.

My husband’s health experience changed the trajectory of our lives and my career completely.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

This is a loaded question! I’m Bethaney. I was 8 when the gulf war started, and 19 when 9/11 happened. The months following 9/11 generated a lot of conversation around the impacts of Stress and Post Traumatic Stress. I was confused that I related to so many of the symptoms, because while my brothers were in Brooklyn and saw the buildings fall, I wasn’t. I had never been exposed to any huge catastrophic event. Still, I decided to talk to a therapist at a free clinic and try to sort out some of my symptoms. I was diagnosed with PTS, which at the time, NO ONE was talking about outside of Ground Zero 9/11 First Responders, much less a 20 something who was healthy, working, living the life. (I do not consider this a “disorder”, so I refer to it as PTS).

The women in my family have had auto immune issues, reproductive organs removed and severe mental health disorders, and they were raised in a time where none of this was spoken about or viewed as potential generational trauma or stress-related issues. I was terrified that I would develop the same diseases and fall into the same dangerous lifestyles that they had.

I was determined to make a good life for myself, and I got in to the field of Dentistry. There was always work, no matter where I chose to live, and I would get paid well. It felt like a stable option. I was a Dental/Surgical Assistant for about 12 years before I started working at the front desk in reception/office management. I worked in that industry from the age of 16 until I was 36.

My grandmother; who was the neighborhood hands on healer kind of a lady; passed away in 2017, and her passing left me with this deep sense that I was not living my life in the way I was meant to. Personally, professionally, spiritually…all the ways.

My health started to suffer after my husbands improved, and we swapped places. His auto-immune issues resolved completely, meanwhile I had constant outbreaks of shingles, rashes, food allergies and bouts of extreme anxiety or complete shutdown. I knew that we both were experiencing the severe physical reaction to stress, but didn’t know what to do about it.

I decided on a deep but sudden whim to attend school for Massage Therapy. (I had played with the idea since I was a teenager, but it wasn’t ‘practical’ so I forgot about it). When my grandmother passed, the old, outdated pull to work hands on turned from a soft occasional whisper that came every 6 or 7 years into a constant scream that I could no longer ignore. I worked at my Dental Office during the day, and took Massage classes at night for about 3 months, and then the Massage classes moved to being on the weekends. I finished in about 9 months. I quit the Dental field completely in May 2018.

It took me a few years to find my voice and approach to Massage Therapy. I knew I specifically wanted to work with how stress and Post Traumatic Stress impacted the body, but struggled to find any teachers that were speaking to this specifically. I finally found my teacher/mentor who is currently in Neuroscience degree program in London. He is *gestures wildly* extremely smart.

I learned how to understand the physical experience of Post Traumatic Stress, as opposed to just the stories that ’cause’ it. It felt like I had found the perfect merging of theories. Dentistry was so anatomy based. So clinical and predictable. The world of “mental health” was anything but that. Rarely was there any imaging, blood draws or brain scans to confirm a diagnosis of “low seratonin”. This followed into the world of Post Traumatic Stress since it has been grouped in with “mental health” and this made it really tricky to learn how to work with it hands on. If it’s just an experience of the big bad thing that happened to you, it seems the treatment would involve talking about the event to reframe it.

It turns out, there are clear and predictable physiological truths that occur consistently in people who have experienced PTS. This lands a huge part of it’s treatment quite literally in the hands of bodyworkers. Learning to touch the tissue of someone who has a sensitive Nervous System, wired for alert…it is a special thing that we are not taught in Massage School.

My clients come to me because traditional Massage Therapy is too aggressive or simply not appropriate for them. It doesn’t address the true cause of the physical symptoms they are having.

Phoenix Bodywork is a Nervous System based approach to working with the body. I see clients in person, I work with them online through language and mindset coaching (which is what I wish my husband and I had access to as a way to work with stress all those years ago), and I teach group workshops. Sometimes this is done through the lens of CrossFit, Dentistry and workplace/team building coaching, and sometimes it’s more specific to small groups of people experiencing grief or other overwhelming emotions.

At the end of 2023, I will begin my educational work, teaching other Massage Therapists how to work with PTS, using specific techniques that work with whatever style of Massage they currently use.

I am so proud that I am still married. That we are both in good health. That I chose to listen to the ping of my heart and choose a whole new way of life for myself. My husband has been incredibly supportive. I’m really excited about this next stage of life and to see how the Massage Therapy education arm of Phoenix will impact the Massage Therapy and Fitness industries.T

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

I had to unlearn the concept of hustling. I have known hard work my whole life. I only knew how to achieve through constant effort and force. And that is extremely effective, but there’s a better way, especially for women.

I now know that in order to give my best work, I require lots of rest. Alone time. Play. Reading and entertainment that is unrelated to my industry.

I create from a place of joy and inspiration, like a well bubbling over. It used to feel like a fire hose against a brick wall. I’m so grateful.

I learned this when I left the Dental industry. It’s so masculine. I find that when I give myself lots of space, and “allow” rather than “force” I have far better results, I am more magnetic, the perfect clients, opportunities and business partners seem to find me, and I have more energy to bring home to my family and friends. I have strong boundaries and burnout is a thing of the past.

Other than training/knowledge, what do you think is most helpful for succeeding in your field?

Massage Therapists are very focused on technical skills. I found that soft skills are far more valuable in terms of success in this field. BUT – the catch is that I don’t believe they can be taught necessarily. And that’s kind of the beauty of it. We typically want to approach soft skills in the same way we would learn technical skills. In a very masculine, show-me-how kind of way.

I believe the most valuable thing Massage Therapists can do is to understand their own nervous system state.

This will allow them to have clear boundaries, especially if they relate to being empathic or energy sensitive. I don’t mean physical boundaries, I mean energetic boundaries. Anyone who works on people’s bodies knows that it can be really draining if you don’t have a solid self-care routine. Knowing clearly what is mine, and what is the other persons…it’s a complete game changer for my physical and mental state, and also for my longevity in this field.

Develop the skill of knowing exactly who you are and how your nervous system operates. This will naturally create a clear distinction between yourself as a practitioner and the clients you serve. (P.S. – there’s no quick fix or easy way to do this. Just start somewhere and expect it to take time, even years)

Clients will be able to tell that you have boundaries, that you are not merging with them, and you will attract the most loving, generous, interesting and enjoyable clientele.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://thephoenixbodywork.com/
• Instagram: Phoenix.Bodywork
• Facebook: Phoenix Bodywork

Image Credits
Jamie Anderson