We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Benjamin Ortiz a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Benjamin, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Have you signed with an agent or manager? Why or why not?
I don’t have a theatrical agent yet, but I do have a manager and a commercial agent. I’m working with two different managers now, one for all the projects in the US, and one for projects in Mexico. I met my LA manager, Laina Cohn, in the most unexpected way: I was still a college student in my second semester of my senior year. As part of my Bachelors program, I had a two-week class in LA in January of 2020. As part of the class, we would study, rehearse, and perform scenes and monologues for top industry professionals: agents, casting directors, producers, show-runners, actors, managers, etc.).
Laina was one of the many guests we had. We did monologues the day she came in, and by the end of mine, we talked for a bit; we were just getting to know each other – important to remember I was under a student visa at the time, and studying full-time in Chicago – and I remember she asked me: “Would you like to stay in the US after graduation?”, and without hesitation I just said “I would love to…”. And that was it, we moved on to the next student’s performance. A couple days went by and I received a friend request on Facebook from Lain. I immediately accepted it and headed to her DMs to tell her it was a pleasure to meet her the other day in class and to thank her for sharing her knowledge and experience with us all. We exchanged a few texts but there was one that excited me the most. She said she was going to Chicago by the end of February and that we should meet because she “would love to hear more about what I wanted to focus on after graduation”.
When she came to Chicago, we met for coffee, and after about 2 hours of conversation, she said that if I was willing, she would love to take me under her wing and help me grow my career…of course I went into the coffee meeting already hoping I could become her client and that she could become my manager. But after getting to know her a lot more and in more depth that day, I was convinced that I had found a guardian angel. I was at a moment in life when I had no idea at all of what I would do or where would I be after graduation. We crossed paths at the right place and the right time. It was honestly a lucky strike to have met her the way I did; and just 2 weeks before the pandemic hit and everything shut down. I’m extremely grateful to have met Laina; not only because we are working together now as client and manager, but also because I met an incredible, passionate, loving, empathetic, understanding, and caring human being, with whom I share the same passion and love for what we do and for the tough industry we’re in.
I’m forever grateful with her for trusting a new and fresh out of college actor – who had done little professional work but tons of students projects – and giving him a chance to team-up with her to grow his career and start this crazy, wild, full of ups-and-downs, but beautiful journey. I consider her family and I feel really lucky to have her. Meeting her was definitely a milestone in my career and a turning point in my life. We have submitted countless auditions, re-taped for callbacks or for different characters within the same project, and have successfully landed a couple of them. The works continues…
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.
For sure! I’m an artists, more specifically an actor. Born and raised in Mexico City to architect parents. Growing up, I did tons of different activities, especially sports: football (soccer), karate, tennis, swimming, volleyball, basketball, fencing, etc. But I also showed interest in the arts – especially in film and TV – but it wasn’t until middle school when I took my first drama class that I decided that I wanted to work in the entertainment industry. At first, my dream was to be a professional soccer player, and I even spent a few months in a tryout process in Pumas UNAM (1st Division team, and the best team in Mexico). However, that didn’t pan out :/. Over time, I spent 3 years in acting workshops at CasAzul (in Mexico City), worked in various plays, and landed my first professional role in the independent feature “Los Herederos” directed by Jorge Hernandez Aldana. I just love everything art-related. I love going to the movies and the theatre a lot too. I love music, and also just spending quality time with friends and family. With what’s important for me in life.
Given my immersion and love for the US entertainment industry, I set off to Chicago – after graduating high school – to pursue a degree in acting and build my professional career in the US, in search of making my dreams come true: to be a Hollywood actor and work with the best in the industry; to be able to be part of this movie magic I grew up with (as audience member), and that had marked me in many different ways…and to be able to work side-to-side with my idols, the artists and creatives who were a huge inspiration and motivation for me to follow this crazy dream. A lot of times, it still feels like a pipe dream, something that’s unreachable or impossible sometimes. I have honestly had many moments when I want to give up because of how hard it is to breakthrough and make way in this industry as a new, up-and-coming actor who has no connections in the industry, is not a nepo baby, and was never a child actor. Not gonna lie, it’s tough sometimes, real tough. But that’s just how it is. I have to make peace with that and keep pushing forward. Countless ups and downs, and a lot of those downs are extremely low. But when I have these low moments, I try to remind myself of why I started this, and I try to keep my hopes and dreams alive by not losing focus of my long-term objectives: that dream my young 14-year-old had. I remind myself of where I want to be in life and why I wanted to pursue this in the first place.
I graduated with high distinction (Summa Cum Laude) and got my Bachelor of Arts in Acting with a Voiceover minor from Columbia College Chicago. During my time at Columbia, I worked on 12 shorts, 4 plays, and got my first role in the US independent film industry with “Bleed American” directed by T.A. Manchester. Outside of college – during my first semester of my junior year, and a couple months after Bleed American – I got my first leading role in the feature film “The Timemaker” directed by Jessica Oberhausen.
In my last semester at Columbia, I traveled to LA for the 2-week program I told you about, as part of my college degree. That’s where I met with top industry professionals including: director and acting coach Anthony Meindl, head of TNT casting Mike Page, agent Laura Walsh (Central Artists), and manager Laina Cohn (Cohn/Torgan Management).
After graduating on May of 2020, I moved to LA to continue building my career and working day by day to accomplish my dreams. I lived in LA for 2 years before having to move back home for reasons out of my control. During those 2 years, I auditioned a lot; sometimes I would dog-sit, work as a PA in music videos and short films, I also did background work, did a few short films with friends, and basically just taking any opportunity to keep working and stay active and training as an artist in LA. It was in October of 2020 that I landed my first Hollywood credit in the MGM film “Dog”, directed and starred by Channing Tatum. That was a dream come true: I used to watch a lot of behind-the-scenes footage from major motion pictures, but that day, I was, in the bts. I couldn’t believe it. “Dog” is my first major movie credit, and I’m working every day to keep climbing up the ladder that is the entertainment industry.
Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?
Oh man, where to start? hahaha, I think that 2022 and 2023 have been the darkest years in my career and life so far… especially August 2022 to November 2023. During this period of time, everything felt like a failure, like I was constantly taking steps back instead of moving forward in my career. It all started after I applied for an artist/work visa. I spent so much money on this application, and also had to wait for about 8 months before I heard back from the USCIS, just to get our petition denied… twice. Given the denial, and that I was no longer under a student visa nor work permit, I had to go back home. This was a huge emotional shock. I had spent 6 years living in the US (4 in Chicago and 2 in LA). It had become my home, where my friends were, where I had started my professional career and my journey to fulfilling my dreams… where I had built my network and my life. But in the lapse of two weeks, I had to give up all of that and move back home; not even knowing what would become of me, where to start or what would I do. I felt lost, hopeless, and full with uncertainty. It felt like starting from zero and just doing the past 6 years all over again, like taking a leap back rather than a step forward.
I came home with the idea that it would be easy to find a gig given my resume, my study, my training, my credits, etc., but oh boy was I wrong. I had never been so wrong in my life. I came back to an industry in Mexico in which the same 5 names were being cast in every single project there was. A growing industry, but in which there were few projects, and the people who got cast were influencers, youtubers, or people who were family, friends, or acquaintances of the directors or producers. I found myself navigating an industry that was almost like an elite club in which you could only get into if you were really close with someone already in it. I spent a whole year and two months knocking on doors, bringing in my resume, my headshots, my special skills, my demo reel, and many different recommendation letters to agencies in hopes to find an agency that would give me a chance; just one opportunity to show what I was made of.
This became a repeating cycle of rejection after rejection after rejection… A lot of agencies and managers were looking for exclusivity world-wide, and that meant dropping Laina… but that option was never on the table for me. Other agencies, just felt cold and distant from their clients; and others didn’t even respond to my emails or requests for appointments. I would rather stay without representation in Mexico than to leave the only person who had my back and trusted me since day one, when I had no name or weight in the industry.
During summer of 2023, I had done an independent film titled “Kokoro: Corazón de Ciudad” from a dear friend, and great director Mao Medina (whom I met at the Chicago International Film Festival back in 2016), and with a group of super talented and beautiful humans and friends. It’s a project that has marked me and that I will cherish forever. However, after that, and after having done a couple of unpaid projects – still without representation -, I faced 6 weeks of extreme darkness.
If I can be candid with you, I had never had such a dark moment in my life. It was a time when I had finished another passion project (singing at a concert for the very first time lol) and was facing the famous post-project depression. In addition, both of my parents were going through a health crisis. This was tough too since I’m an only child and had to deal with that, a lot of the time on my own.
Furthermore, I lost two valuable friends during those weeks – don’t worry, they didn’t die, they just erased me from their lives haha :( -, friends whom I deeply loved and with whom I thought I had a beautiful friendship that would last forever. One of them just started ghosting me until I asked her about it and I understood that she didn’t consider me a friend any longer; I had become a stranger in her life despite having lived many experiences together, and being really close for the past couple of years. I get that everything changes, but some changes happen with the people you expect it the least. And I truly think that ending a friendship can, sometimes, be more painful than a romantic heartbreak. And the other friend just blocked me and deleted me from socials…out of the blue, without any reason nor explanation. And to this day, I have no idea why that happened. But with this, I learned that maybe some friendships aren’t meant to last forever. Some people will only be temporary visitors in your life. And that some friendships will end when you never expect it and in the most unexpected way. It just sucks that it’s the people whom you love the most and with whom you had a a beautiful relationship that walk out of your life. Unfortunately, sometimes it just happens and you just gotta deal with the heartbreak and move on. Life keeps going.
On top of all of this, I was also missing my life in LA so so badly; missing my friends, the city, the opportunities, my routine, my manager, my team, my chosen family… I was also at a point in my life where I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel nor a clear path to follow my dreams… I felt stuck, and as if I was moving back day by day, instead of moving forward in life and career. I was also dealing with moving back with my parents after 6 years of living alone (but with roommates), and I felt like I had lost my independence and freedom as well. Don’t get me wrong, I love my parents. I wouldn’t be where I am in life and wouldn’t have had the amazing life I’ve had if it weren’t for them. I would do anything for them. But it was really hard to re-adapt to living with them again after so long. And it took me a few months to fully re-adapt to my life in Mexico, but I finally did and I love it here too. It is, and will always be: home.
In addition, I felt like I was doing nothing with my life. I would (mistakenly) compare myself with my peers and felt like my career was going nowhere… every day I just felt like a huge failure. There’s no other way to say it: I felt useless, and a failed artist; almost like a fraud. I was waking up late without any motivation or inspiration to do anything at all. Every morning, I’d wake up and wanted it to be dark again so that I could go back to sleep. I reached a point in which I just wanted to give up on everything; my hopes, my dreams, my passion, my hobbies… everything. And all of this happened within 5-6 weeks… truly the darkest times I’ve lived.
Until one day, I found pictures of my first acting gigs, and my phone reminded me of my first time on “Dog”, my first Hollywood set… this was enough to spark that flame within me again. I remembered every detail of that process, from getting the audition email to wrapping up filming, and sharing the experience with my roommates while we were having dinner that night. All of a sudden, something awoke in me, and I became aware of where I was in life; aware of the extremely dark hole I was in. I realized that I was so overwhelmed by everything that was going on, and by all the changes and heartbreaks I was facing in such a short amount of time, that I had completely lost track of myself and my path. I made the decision of climbing out of that hole and going back to grinding and working, and enduring all the downs that this career has, in order to keep fighting for that dream that my younger self had.
I started meditating daily again and it was like magic to me. It helped stopped being trapped in the past… in a past life that was not there anymore. I realized I was spending so much time living in the past and worrying about the future, that I hadn’t noticed that the present was already different. Meditating helped me remember that the present moment is all we really have. Everything else is in our heads: the past, the future, our fears, our expectations, etc. I reconnected with myself, with my core, with my essence; with the love and the good in life. I started to be more aware and consciously trying to be present. I started to seize every moment, and enjoy everything and everyone I had right here, right now. To enjoy my parents, my friends, and family while I have this time with them.
We never know what’s gonna happen tomorrow and I had learnt that everything can change drastically in a matter of seconds. Change is the only constant in life, and it doesn’t mean that things are better or worse than before…they’re just different. I made it out of that darkness and stepped back into the light. I’m grateful for that moment of extreme darkness tho: it made me way more resilient now. It made me mentally and emotionally stronger. Now, I try to live in the moment, not worrying about what, when or how I’ll get to where I wanna be…I try to just trust the process; the good, the bad, the doubts, the ups and downs, the rejections, the fears, the small but significant accomplishments… I try to focus on me, my journey, and my emotional, mental, spiritual, social, and physical well-being. Every person had their own path. We all have our own pace. And like Laina tells me any time I feel desperate: “remember Ben, it’s a marathon, not a sprint. And just because some people skip some grades/levels, it doesn’t mean that you won’t get there.” Like I said, she’s my guardian angel.
And just a couple months after this wake-up call, I found the best manager I could’ve found in Mexico. When I met Genaro Peñalosa (my manager in Mexico), he was just starting as talent manager in a new branch at a modeling agency in Mexico City (GH Management). In November of 2023 I met with him, we talked for a bit, and I felt that same connection I felt with Laina back in January of 2020. I found a person who was very passionate about what we do, who was an honest, and caring human being, and with whom I shared the same life and professional values. I realized then, that this was why I had been rejected over and over for the past year… Everything led me to this moment. I had finally found a manager who was the perfect fit to keep building my team alongside Laina, Jon, and Matt (my commercial agent at RTA Agency). And I’m still building my team, my chosen family. January 2024 came by, and with that, the new year started and my worst year had stayed behind. 2023 was in the past, and it had taught me that it’s ok to re-live the past, but we have to be conscious and aware to not stay there. We have to focus on the good and the love in life, and try our best to be mindful in everything we do and everyone we interact with. Of course it’s easier said than done. But we have to make an effort to be present, and to not get stuck in the past nor the future. I learned so much of life and my industry during 2023. Everything passes, the good and bad. Life is just a constant of temporary experiences. And that’s why we have to seize the day and every single moment we get.
We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?
I guess it’s just the fact that nothing will work out as planned, or as how we expect it to work out; at least not always. More specifically in this industry, it hurts to say, but what I’ve learnt in the past few years – at least what my experience has been because we all have different and unique experiences – is that, when we are starting as new actors, despite being actors who are prepared and trained, who have been through the extreme ups and downs, who have cried, felt frustrated and powerless and want to give up every day but are still there; pushing, and showing up because it’s what we’re passionate about; actors with no connections in the industry or other privileges such as nepotism (which is prevalent in a lot of industries, not only in the entertainment industry)… most of the roles or attention will go to those better connected, or with a higher influence on social media. It’s just the truth of the industry, at first. A lot of times, the industry values a lot more followers and names or contacts; than talent, skills, training, preparation, passion, and drive.
Nevertheless, I hope that this only happens at the start. And that, as we keep progressing and moving up in the industry, and start getting momentum, the industry will see us as we see ourselves, and it will finally see our talent, our spark, and our shine. All the training, the struggle, and the resilience that we have as artists, all of it DOES matter. It matters a lot and it shows. You can see when an actor is well-trained, when they have the knowledge and experience, as opposed to an actor who doesn’t. Or someone who got hired just cause they have thousands or hundreds of thousands of followers. At the end of the day, it all shows; the training, the experience, the preparation, the knowledge, the drive, the passion…it’s all reflected on our performances and work ethic. And at the end, that’s what’s worth it in a production. We just gotta keep pushing, and keep reminding ourselves of our value, our worth, our drive, and our goals. We will get there. Just keep pushing. And. Do. Not. Give. Up.
If you made it this far, I sincerely appreciate you for reading me, and hope to see you in the movies :)
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm8646697/?ref_=fn_al_nm_1
- Instagram: @benortiz11
Image Credits
Héctor Alegría.