Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Ashley-Nicole Russell. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Alright, Ashley-Nicole thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Let’s jump into the story of starting your own firm – what should we know?

My journey to establishing my own firm was unique and even a bit of a surprise to myself since I did this straight of out law school. Despite the challenges, I knew that it was something I had to do in order to practice Collaborative Law in eastern North Carolina.

After law school, I planned on focusing solely on mediation; however, that plan evolved while I was studying for the Bar Exam. One of the videos that I was watching went into examples of family law cases and describing how clients aren’t supposed to talk to each other after they file and what happened if they did communicate. It essentially created conflict within conflict. As I was reading through this case, it made me reflect on my own life. My parents experienced a tumultuous divorce when I was a child, so looking at this case, I started to remember times when my parents weren’t allowed to talk to each other. Times when they needed to talk to one another about me or what was going on in my life, they weren’t allowed. This evolved and eventually this lack of communication led to a level of hatred between one another. The overall culture around what was happening in family law was really pushing them to hate each other even more which led to more alienation which led to more issues.

During my undergrad years, I was a Certified District Court Mediator and I really enjoyed that. So, I attended law school to focus on mediation and dispute resolution. While working on my Juris Doctor, I also earned a Certificate in Dispute Resolution from the Dispute Resolution Institute. Professional training in these practices helped me realize how different my own life would have been if my parents divorced amicably through mediation or Collaborative Law. The entire culture of family law would have been different. The strategies I was being taught as a law student were specifically related to the downfall of the industry of family law. I knew that I really needed to do something to fix this cycle for children of divorce. Even though it was scary to think about starting my own firm directly out of law school, I knew in that moment that I already had the tools I needed to be successful. My goal with my first law firm was to utilize out-of-court processes to help people understand the differences between alternative dispute resolution options and litigation. There are endless benefits with Collaborative Law, mediation, and settlement negotiation. Meanwhile, there are many problems with litigation when children are involved. This inspired me to write my book, The Cure for Divorce Culture, to explore the damaging impact of litigation on children of divorce and how we, as society, can prevent this from happening. I understood such a connection from my past to my future and I knew that I had a purpose on this planet. I knew that the first step of that would be to start my own firm fresh out of law school.

As a result, I am honored to be the first Collaborative Law attorney in the area and I’m even more proud of the fact that I’m no longer the only one. Once the concept of this out-of-court divorce process caught on, it became desirable for not only spouses seeking divorce but divorce attorneys who wanted to offer an alternative to litigation.

In terms of main steps, the first thing outside of establishing a business was to secure office space. This is always crucial to setting up a business that needs to be brick and mortar. When I first started, fortunately, I had a lot of people who really helped and supported me. For example, other attorneys without family law services were very gracious and allowed me to rent their conference rooms and then rent space for a lower cost in order to be able to get my business off the ground. This was so important for me since I was practicing a new concept and area of law, in a new geographic area, and as a new attorney. It was a lot of factors that, in retrospect, were terrifying but due to my passion I knew I owed it to myself to try. I believed so much in what I was doing and the purpose of Collaborative Law that I knew it would be successful.

I think people need to remember when starting a business is that an online presence and physical presence are both crucial. Since Collaborative Law was a new concept in eastern North Carolina in 2011, I needed to inundate a level of awareness. This needed to be more than regular marketing – it needed to have a strong impact and make people stop and think. I invested in commercials during prime spots. This included business break segments where I could have two minutes of information during a morning news program. I also ran commercials during timeslots of CBS Sunday Morning which allowed me to tap into a specific audience and potential target market. When I committed to opening my practice, I promised to myself that I would always look for ways to spread awareness. This really set the tone for who I am as an attorney and the brand of my firm.

For young professionals looking to start their own firms or careers in law, I want them to know that they don’t know what they’re doing until they’ve done it. It’s not going to be found in the pages of a book or while you’re briefing a case in law school. It’s going to be found practicing. And that means that it is essential to do an internship, it’s essential to be a law clerk, it’s essential to do clinics. That’s where you get your hands on the material and you’re able to put into practice what you’re learning and that’s when you’re able to understand what it is like to help people and what it is to be an attorney and have that level of responsibility. For me personally, I did an unpaid internship and then I was able to serve as a law clerk. It is my understanding that I was the very first law clerk for Collaborative Family Law in the nation. I had such a powerful experience in these roles that I knew I wanted to offer them at my firm. I started an internship program at AN|R Law with a step-by-step program where we grow our own associates and our own employees. For undergrads interested in law careers, we offer unpaid internships and then clerkships for those in law school. Finally, they have the opportunity to join our team as an associate. We’ve seen a lot of success with this model. I’m thrilled that many of our interns over the years have been awarded scholarship money from their schools because of the extensive and hands-on experience they already going into law school from being with us as early as undergrad. It’s been a rewarding journey working with young people who are eager and energetic. I love that we are able to spend time with the next generation of attorneys and show them that there are different ways to practice law and they can see all aspects of it.

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

I am an award-winning collaborative family law attorney, business leader, author, and speaker based in eastern North Carolina. My mission is to change the way divorce is perceived around the world. Through my law practice, AN|R Law, I help families understand that they have options when it comes to divorce and they can handle their matters out of court. I am committed to helping children involved in divorce and keeping them away from tumultuous court battles.

I started my practice based on a passion and desire to make family law a safer place for children. The brand that I have created is consistent with the messaging from my own childhood experiences as a child of divorce. This led me to my mission of changing how divorce is handled in America. This relates directly with the problems that my law firm solves for our clients. We focus a lot on problem solving in terms of legal, parental, emotional, and financial ways. Not only do we effectively assist in separating the life they’ve built with their spouse together, but we talk a lot about co-parenting. This is important for maintaining a healthy relationship for children involved in the divorce. While the parents may not be in a personal relationship anymore, they’re still in a parenting relationship. That said, they’re also in somewhat of a business relationship in order to finalize the end of their finances and other financial entanglements that they may have, so we solve all of those issues. We also help to bring a level of awareness to what the process is like and the healing process that takes place during and after divorce. It’s important for me to explain to clients during consultation that they are going to leave with not only information but a plan for the next 10 steps in their divorce journey. This allows them to prepare so we can work together to meet their goal. I think that having a structure of understanding along with a series of incremental steps allows people to understand how to get to the light on the other side.

I’m most proud of the book that I wrote, the Cure for Divorce Culture, and the podcast that I host, “Divorce, Healthy! with Ashley-Nicole Russell.” These platforms allow people around the world to access important information about divorce and co-parenting. I think having this type of information in the public space for all to access is another way to help the family unit have less factures when dealing with a tumultuous time like divorce.

Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?

Resiliency is such a beautiful word. It brings about so many emotions. I think I was most resilient when I went through my own separation and divorce – and later remarried. When my law practice was only a few years old, my first husband and I made an amicable decision to not continue forward. As a child of divorce, this was terrifying because I knew I was part of a statistic that I always talked about. According to data and research, children of divorced parents have an incredibly high chance for their own divorce. Both of us were children of divorce and we had so many scars that I share in my book, The Cure for Divorce Culture. It seemed like a really big failure at the time because I knew it could have been different if I had been different. We were both really good people, but we just had so much baggage from our parents.

Rather than have the conflict-driven divorce process that our parents had, we did it differently. We were able to be reasonable people and follow the Collaborative Divorce process. This experience was difficult and emotional, but it allowed me to be resilient. It also gave me a lot of confidence in the type of law I was practicing and also in my own personal ability to pick myself back up. I was then able to redirect a lot of my energy into solidifying my law firm’s brand. It allowed me to learn from my own mistakes and get my message out by being committed not only in a local community level but also a statewide level and a national level. Once I made it through that challenging time and got back up, I was much stronger on the other side. This experience and my personal resiliency story have helped me relate to my clients and connect with them on an even deeper level.

How’d you build such a strong reputation within your market?

In 2017, I won the Greenville-Pitt County Small Business Leader of the Year award. The Chamber of Commerce announces three finalists and then a selection committee votes on the winner. I knew I was a finalist, along with two men with decades of experience as business owners, each running very successful companies. Meanwhile, my law firm was in year six and I was in my early 30s. I honestly didn’t think I had a chance at winning this award – so I was shocked when they announced me as the winner. I had a very emotional thank you speech that related a lot to my childhood and my mission. After the award ceremony and celebration, so many people came up to me with words of encouragement and also heartbreak. Several men and women told me they wish they knew about my law firm or the practice of Collaborative Law during their divorce or their parents’ divorce. When I got home that night, instead of feeling excited because of my win, I felt the weight of the world. I knew what I needed to do which was not just in Greenville, it was statewide and nationwide. I became more involved in Collaborative Law and advocated for not only the practice but also for the children. I co-founded the North Carolina Collaborative Attorney Network with other attorneys in the state to help families in North Carolina find out-of-court resources. I also joined the National Board of Directors for National Parents Organization to help the shared parenting movement. This organization is committed to providing resources and information for children having access to both of their parents in cases of separation and divorce. Not having that myself during my own childhood, this is something I’m truly passionate about. I know so much would have been different in my life and in my parents’ lives if their divorce process and co-parenting plan were handled better. While AN|R Law will always be a North Carolina law firm, the brand of AN|R: A Negotiated Resolution is now nationally known. I think it’s bigger than I ever thought it could be and it makes me want to push even more because I know how many people I’m able to help. It’s truly the best feeling.

Contact Info:

• Website: www.anrlaw.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/anrlaw/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ANRLaw/
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/anrlaw/
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHO1RHPfSMXcvdeTYAggv4g
• Other: Podcast: https://divorcehealthy.captivate.fm, https://anrlaw.com/divorce-healthy-podcast/ Book: https://www.amazon.com/Cure-Divorce-Culture-Ashley-Nicole-Russell/dp/1732553807