We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Ashley Mendoza a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Ashley , thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today What sort of legacy are you hoping to build. What do you think people will say about you after you are gone, what do you hope to be remembered for?

After becoming a parent, I became more deliberate about my legacy. Leading a purposeful and passionate life is the ultimate legacy. Each day, engaging in activities I am passionate about is empowering. Leaving a positive mark on the community and my loved ones is crucial. A video I once watched highlighted how much time the average person spends on unfulfilling tasks while waiting for retirement, only to then face typical constraints of old age. Sadly, we often wait for a moment that never lives up to our expectations. My goal is to reverse this pattern by living a fulfilling life now and continually making a positive impact on those around me. Nowadays, people seek encouragement and it is vital to show others that creating a life they are proud of is achievable.

Ashley , love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

I always had the desire to establish my own business, although I was uncertain about the path to take. Growing up in a family of business owners, I often assisted my parents in their ventures. My father, a finance professional, juggled numerous side projects alongside his full-time government job. Upon earning my bachelor’s degree in entrepreneurship, I made a promise to myself not to pursue further education unless it enabled me to work for myself. After careful consideration, I opted to pursue a master’s degree in clinical mental health. I have a deep passion for helping others and a compassionate nature. Although I can’t heal the entire world, I focus on supporting high-achieving women who feel setbacks in their careers or lives after becoming mothers. I assist these ambitious women in regaining control of their lives, helping them overcome generational patterns and trauma to pursue the life they dream of. I offer these women hope that they can achieve success in all aspects of their lives.

We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?

I had to unlearn what strength looked like. I grew up believing that vulnerability was a weakness. I had this idea that I had to hold it all together. I believed that I could not allow emotions to seep through or one would believe I was not competent or focused. As a child we did not talk about emotions or how things impacted us. I did not have the skill set to practice this act. I literally feel like I went through my military career with a mask. It was if I was living a double life. As a civilian I was learning how to hone my femininity. However, as a soldier I was kicking butts and taking names. As a black women in leadership I focused on ways to maintain my ability to be respectable to my superior and subordinates. I was not to be seen as soft but firm and even tempered. This was a challenge. I felt like I was always on stage. Many times I would struggle in silence. I had a select few that I trusted to openly share, but the military did not give space for mental illness. It was a culture where we “suck it up and keep truckin”. This concept was hard. I learned how to be effective despite my mental illness. Now that I am retired, I had the pleasure of taking the mask off. As a black woman I feel so free. I am able to embrace my culture and femininity and voice is so powerful. I still embrace some of what I learned from the military. I also have learned new ways to share when I am not well or need help. This has been so liberating. My husband and I have created a culture where asking for help is not a weakness but a strength. This misconception is what I offer my clients. The power in using our voice to be authentic and celebrated for our truths. In this energy we are able to be supported and move towards wellness.

Can you tell us about a time you’ve had to pivot?

In life there are times when one must accept things are not going according to plan and be flexible.

Contact Info:

• Website: newwayofbeing.life
• Instagram: new.way.of.being