Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Anna Socolofsky. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Alright, Anna thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. We’d love to hear the story of how you went from this being just an idea to making it into something real.

I hatched the idea for my business after writing my own wedding ceremony in 2020. It was such a joyful, meaningful process, and I knew mine was not the last love story I wanted to tell!

At the time, though, I was still teaching middle school, and it was the middle of the pandemic. Plus, I had never owned a business before, so I had a lot to learn.

I became a mom in 2021, and very quickly realized that I wouldn’t be able to go back to work as a teacher, like I had originally planned. My world got ripped out from under me– I had no income, suddenly, and was experiencing PTSD and PPAD due to the traumatic nature of my childbirth experience. It was one of those moments in life where you realize you have nothing left to lose. So day after day, while I held or bounced my baby to sleep, I’d pull up the notes app on my phone and jot down the ideas I had for how to bring Ecstatic Ceremonies to life.

Initially, I planned to offer DIY wedding planning services in addition to ceremony writing services, so the first few clients I had were friends and family members who needed help planning their small backyard pandemic weddings. I appreciated being able to try out my ideas with these trusted folks, and began collecting a few professional photos from those weddings I’d be able to use on my website.

As that first year went on, I splurged on my first Squarespace site, and spent my son’s naptimes working on it, one or two hours at a time. Of course, I was also washing bottles, making dinner, and juggling all the other responsibilities parents have! My business became my treasured creative outlet during this time. It was so powerful to be creating something I was so proud of, and that represented the best of me, during such an intense period of my life.

Eventually, a photographer friend of mine knew what I was working on, and invited me to join her in a gothic styled shoot with a crew of amazing wedding vendors. I jumped right in, and used the opportunity to put my ideas about ceremony design into practice. I interviewed the couple and created a beautiful vow renewal for them. I was also able to meet other vendors, who I’ve worked with many times since, and gain traction on social media as we all shared the very cool images from the shoot.

That shoot got me noticed! I received an inquiry from an amazing couple, and that’s when the ball really started rolling.

Over the last three years, I’ve moved from working in my kitchen to having a dedicated office space in our guest room. I’ve grown from 3, to 27+ weddings per season. I’ve reworked my pricing, my website, and my social media presence over and over to make sure the pillars of my business reflect my values while still offering me a supportive income. I’ve learned how to do my business taxes, how to market myself, and I’ve even started a podcast that is currently in the works!

Meanwhile, my little one has continued to grow. When he turned 1, we really needed supplemental income. I was fortunate to find part-time work at a preschool who offered free childcare to children of the staff, so for about 18 months I worked three days per week at the preschool, and then three days per week on building my business and officiating weddings. It was a really busy time, but I knew I had to grind in order to bring my dream to life. Last spring, I was finally confident in my ability to fill a wedding season, and I moved on from the preschool in order to run Ecstatic Ceremonies full time. And sure enough, I wrote and officiated 27 beautiful wedding ceremonies that year!

I have been so grateful for the support of my wife, friends and family as I built this dream from scratch. I am proud to be able to support my little family doing something I love and that means so much to so many people!

Anna, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

My gift and my work has always been to inspire connection, spark joy, and create magic in community.

I started my career as a middle school science teacher after getting my Masters in Education in 2016. Now, instead of sparking joy inside a classroom, I facilitate ecstatic marriage experiences for couples and their closest friends and family!

My job is to act as a conduit for each of my couples: to put words to the story of their love and ground their profound act of union in a ceremony that illuminates their love’s unique brilliance.

As an intuitive facilitator and a student of world religions (that was my major in college!), I have always been drawn to the cosmic and the eternal. Rituals and ceremonies are what connect us to our humanness, and unite us through time and space to those that have come before.

It is my greatest joy and privilege to craft the kind of marriage ceremonies that meaningfully and authentically welcome folks into the legacies of love that bind us to our ancestors.

How’d you build such a strong reputation within your market?

I truly, genuinely care about each and every one of my clients, and they can feel that.

Throughout my career, I’ve learned that what I believe about people is entirely up to me. What that looks like now is that I hold the belief that each of my clients is a) a good person doing their absolute best, b) knows what they need, and c) that they have wisdom to offer that everyone can learn from.

I find that when I approach people, believing these things about them (sometimes, without ever having met them), somehow these beliefs always prove to be true. To be seen for your goodness, to be trusted to make the right decisions for you, and to feel valued for the unique experiences and traits that make you who you are, allows folks to open up and share the best of themselves with not only me but with their partner(s) and loved ones.

This radiates out into the types of ceremonies I am able to create. Each one is authentic and full of grace for the journeys in life and love that we are all on. I create a space in which the messiness of our shared humanity is celebrated and the through-line of love is revered.

These beliefs also hold true for all vendors I find myself working with on wedding days, and even extends to the guests! In believing these things about all those I come into contact with, I have built not just a reputation in the wedding market but a wonderful community of folks united around love and its power for good in our lives. I can only hope they believe the same things about me!

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

I’ve had to unlearn that I’m the right choice for everyone.

When I started this business, I wanted to cast as wide of a net as possible in order to bring in more clients, gain experience, and make as much money as I could. I was also unsure of my value in the market and wanted to prove to myself that I was good at what I do. I also value accessibility and wanted to tell love stories for all couples, regardless of how much money they could spend, so I’d do a lot of work at a very low hourly rate. But over time, I built enough of a reputation that I was booking my entire summer and fall season, working every weekend in addition to during the week, and I realized that I was really overextending myself.

I had to sit down with myself and grapple with the tension there. How could I decrease my workload, make more money (which, to be fair, is still a very modest sum), and still be available to all good-fit couples?

I ended up hiring Unlock Collective, a small-business consulting firm here in Portland, to help me work through this dilemma. They helped me see just how much value I offer, and that it’s okay to raise my prices (while still offering equity pricing on my own terms)– and that for like-minded clients, the price I am charging will be something they want to pay, because they will resonate with the work I do and it will matter to them.

In going through this process, I’ve learned that there are LOTS of options across the market, and I truly may not be the best fit for many folks– and that is okay! But in being totally authentic to my process and my values, I have found so many wonderful couples who are eager to work together. My wedding season is still filling up, just a bit slower (yay), and I feel that I have so much more room to be present with the folks who have chosen to work with me.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.ecstaticceremonies.com
• Instagram: @ecstatic_ceremonies

Image Credits

Marissa Solini Photography, Darla Maxine Photography