Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Anfisa Brewer. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Alright, Anfisa thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. We’d love to hear about a project that you’ve worked on that’s meant a lot to you.

The most meaningful project I have worked on would be Dirty Bones… people often assume I’m running a business here and at one point I definitely was, but as I’ve grown & changed, so has she! Sharing art with people, connecting with them on a personal level, and being able to bring light and hope into people’s lives through teaching has been so incredibly inspiring and healing for me.

I hesitate to call Dirty Bones a business because it feels much deeper than a way to make a living; it’s moreso a way for me to live. I grew up in a home where my creativity was often discouraged and that really impacted my self-worth in a negative way for a long time. I felt very out of place growing up and still do most times, especially at my day job. Artists are such deeply feeling creatures that we often feel insane trying to find our way in a world that discourages depth and authenticity. But, the more I played and explored my creativity, I could see myself transforming. Slowly but surely, not just finding but actually being able to carve out my place in this world is something that was only possible for me through the act of creation. I found the more I made art, the more I was able to understand myself and why I am who I am. I was able to connect more deeply with myself and the world around me than I ever did before I started pursuing my creativity.

I often start many workshops by going around the room and asking my participants to share their name and what brought them in that day, and quite often there’s a number of people who will say “I’m not talented I’m sure I won’t do well” or “I’m not good at art but I want to try”. Hearing these things brings me to tears because first off, that’s not an idea that they came up with on their own. Our insecurities about our creativity are planted by parents, society, teachers, and many other negative influences throughout life. Secondly, my most discouraged participants are often the ones who end up making the most beautiful and thought provoking pieces. Seeing a room of strangers come together and uplift each other and bond with each other for an afternoon is such an incredible privilege.

So being able to share that opportunity of self-discovery and understanding with others, connecting with my students and fellow artists and really being uplifted simply by hearing their stories and what brought them into my workshop that day has been the most meaningful project I could ever pursue and I plan to continue doing so for a very long time.

Anfisa, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

Whhhhoooo boy okay here we go! As I mentioned previously, I teach workshops not just to share art but to encourage connection and self discovery. I went to school and graduated in 2022 with a BFA in graphic design, and that’s been fun & challenging, but it doesn’t necessarily fulfill me. I very much enjoy my day job but it keeps me rather disconnected from myself at times. I started playing with illustration and printmaking in college, and for a while I ran Dirty Bones by selling illustrated merch and freelance work. But even then, the burnout just crashed over me so quickly and I often found myself exhausted with admin work instead of enjoying the creative process. So, I took a little break! Then in June of 2023 I started doing small workshops here and there, and it really just took off. I really, for the first time, felt like I was doing something I was *meant* to do, instead of just doing something I happened to be good at.

I loved teaching people art, connecting with them, listening to them, learning from them, and since then I’ve taught a variety of mediums from screen printing to gel plates and solar printing with various businesses and organizations in San Antonio! It really fuels my creativity and it’s just fun to get a group of people together and chat and make art for an afternoon. I feel that what makes me stand out in my work is my commitment to accesibility & building an art practice that’s good for you & your community. I focus on teaching small things like sourcing secondhand materials, shopping local, and swapping out name brand products for household staples in my workshops and classes, as an effort to show people that art isn’t out of your reach, you just have to get a little creative ;) Each class I teach, I write a guide to go along with it with instructions, tips, and local places to purchase supplies so people can continue making art on their own! I also work hard to ensure everyone in my workshops feels seen and heard, whether that means learning Spanish and ASL on the side so I can communicate with a wider range of people, or staying an extra 30 minutes troubleshooting to make sure everyone goes home with an art piece they’re happy with.

I think the thing I’m most proud of in my work is my ability to share art with the world in a way that’s deeper than just selling it. I no longer offer freelance design or illustration services, but I’m always happy to help out a local organization in need. It’s been fun doing pop ups and custom art for a wide variety of organizations from community grassroots teams helping our local unhoused folx to places like The Briscoe Museum of Western Art & Mitchell Lake Audubon Center at their community events, and it feels good to share my talent with the world in a way that allows me to encourage and connect with the public on a deeper level. Another reason I struggled with selling art is that I struggle to initiate social interactions – I am not one to strike up a conversation with a stranger in public, but with a squeegee in my hand conversation comes much more easily, and my interactions feel so much less transactional.

I think if there’s anything that I want my potential followers to know, it’s that you have a place here in this world and no one can stop you from making art. Your voice is unique, your experiences are unique, and the world is so ready and waiting to love you, criticism be damned.

Is there something you think non-creatives will struggle to understand about your journey as a creative? Maybe you can provide some insight – you never know who might benefit from the enlightenment.

Omg, yes! Selling art – let’s talk about selling art, cause I hate it.

I feel like, especially in the era of tiktok shops and economic stress where people often have to resort to multiple streams of revenue to survive, there’s so much more pressure now than ever before for artists to “make a profit”. So often I’ll show people my work or I’ll be wearing it in public and I always get the comment “you should sell that” and so badly I wanna respond “babe I did and I hated it.” This isn’t to bash artists working hard to make a profit off their work; it’s a dream to be able to support yourself with your passions and I think that’s such a noble thing to strive for! BUT, selling should NOT be the focus of your creative practice, it should be creating. I understand we all have bills to pay and as someone who’s been financially independent since I became an adult I get it, money’s tight and we gotta get creative to make ends meet. I fully understand I’m very fortunate to be able to have a day job that covers my needs and allows me to truly just pursue creativity for creativity’s sake on the side without having to worry about bills.

HOWEVER, when we get caught up in the rat race and bringing in money, we start to detach from our humanity. When we focus on the likes and the follows and the “NEW ORDER!!!” notifications, we lose sight of what art’s really about, which is expression, connection, and emotion. However, non-creatives who haven’t tapped into that deeply feeling side of themselves tend to see art as being transactional. They see creation as a means to an end instead of the miraculous opportunity that it is. Like man – it is SUCH A PRIVILEGE to look at a blade of grass or a grandmother and her granddaughter laughing in the sun and be able to take that divine moment in time and translate it into a beautiful, tangible piece of work that resonates with other human beings. In the act of creation, there is an opportunity to share your perspective with the world and discover yourself and that’s something that I personally can’t fully enjoy if I’m also focusing on marketing and analytics. Most non-creatives fail to understand (through no fault of their own of course) that the process of creating is the real reward, not the money you can make from it.

How about pivoting – can you share the story of a time you’ve had to pivot?

A time when I had to majorly pivot was realizing that I was not going to succeed as a freelancer. Growing up as the eldest daughter of a single mother, I was constantly pushed towards independence, financially and career-wise. So, when I started doing freelance in college and actually started building a business, I was FUCKING PROUD, cause that’s not something most design students can handle on top of a full courseload and a 40-hour work week. But I was doing it! And I was good at it, considering my lack of experience. But, after graduation, I noticed myself slipping up constantly. I was missing deadlines, forgetting emails, overcharging invoices, under-delivering for clients, it was just a mess. A lot of people contributed these mishaps to my young age and again, lack of experience and told me to essentially just ‘do better’. So I kept going, kept trying, but deep down I knew I was miserable, to the point that I HATED graphic design in general and never wanted to talk or think about it. Eventually I had to admit to myself that freelance and running a business was just not something I wanted to do, ever again. And that came with a lot of guilt, a lot of shame. For a long time I was a high-achiever! I was impressive, smart for my age, talented for my age! How could someone with as much potential as me be failing at something I loved doing? I had more time on my hands now that I wasn’t in school, so why wasn’t I making this work?

But, something I failed to realize at the time was that I am just not a financially-motivated person, and that’s okay. It took many long months and late nights to realize that everything I had been fed about myself from a young age was just… wrong. I wasn’t stupid or a failure, I just wasn’t cut out to constantly be selling, selling, selling. My heart yearned for more, and I took a long time to listen to it but I’m glad I finally did.

I started hosting workshops and everything just fell into place so naturally; I got a membership at the amazing Breva Creative, a local makerspace that has allowed me to explore my passions of sewing and printmaking and silversmithing without the constant pressure of deadlines and client expectations. I started to lean into my creativity, started creating for the sake of creating, and realized that in running a business I had really been depriving my soul of a much-needed outlet. Now I’m happier than I ever was and I have a day job that challenges me to be the best designer I can be alongside an art practice that really fulfills my heart. I’m glad I gave up running a business because I look back now and realize my need to align with others’ expectations was really holding me back. I didn’t realize it then, but working freelance was never about being financially independent or pursuing my creativity, it was about doing what I had been told to do with my life; it was about impressing others and finding a sense of self worth in accomplishment. I was really hurting myself and it took me essentially failing miserably to even realize that.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://dirtybonesdesign.carrd.co/?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAaaku0nJ8mfTwtOiaXdDFe_ueP7ZQlO5PjTkvqSvDNg3NSL1j4bBas1dYnE_aem_yhvbkBy-rGXsDFjrLAb0yw
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dirtybonesdesignco/