We recently connected with Amy Rowan and have shared our conversation below.
Amy, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. We’d love to have you retell us the story behind how you came up with the idea for your business, I think our audience would really enjoy hearing the backstory.
For 13 years, weekend after weekend, women would come into my private ordering room and tell me what was happening in their bedrooms. The good, the bad, the frustrating, the satisfying. They would ask, “is this normal?” “What’s wrong with me?” “How do I explain this to my partner?” “I never knew that about my body!” Seeing lightbulbs come on and jaws drop as I explained about the female G-spot or how to actually enjoy anal play, was always my favorite part of my job as a consultant with Pure Romance. But when women asked me for genuine HELP, I knew selling them a product wasn’t the best solution. That’s when I started searching for how I could REALLY help them.
Sex and Intimacy Coaching is something that very few people know about, but there is an enormous need. Sex Coaching combines life coaching and sexology. Sexology is the study of human sexual behavior and how people think and feel about it. A life coach is a type of wellness professional who helps people make progress in their lives in order to attain greater fulfillment, often focusing on health/fitness, personal and professional goals. Sex coaching is a beautiful blend of the two, providing a practical, goal oriented, sex positive approach. Sexology is the “what” and coaching is the “how.”
There is an enormous need for sex coaching as a profession. Traditional therapy, mental or sexual, focuses on diagnosing and pathologizing sexual behavior. There is a focus on dysfunction, or what is “wrong.” Most mental health and medical professionals, due to lack or training or personal discomfort with sexual topics, either gloss over, ignore or refer patients/clients out for assistance with sexual challenges. Sex therapists have long filled this niche, but it is important to distinguish between Sex Coaching and Sex Therapy.
A sex therapist is trained to look back into the client/patient’s past and figure out “why” their client is experiencing emotions or taking actions, based on childhood experiences, family of origin, trauma, or sexual violence. A sex coach works with the client on present issues and what the client wants in the future. Coaching is about “how” to move forward by setting goals and establishing an action plan to get there. I start with the client’s concerns and then we cooperatively set a plan towards their personal, sexual and relationship goals. While I do look at the past as a place where patterns may have developed, my area of focus is present and future as our clients explore their sexual selves. My focus is education instead of counseling. I encourage my clients to reframe their view of “normal” to what is natural.
There are very few places where people and couples can get educated, sex-positive, supportive coaching for an area of life that can be so critical to one’s relationship with their partner, and themselves. I am deeply drawn to the opportunity to help so many people in different ways, whether it is learning the basics to taking things to new heights.
I view myself as THE Suburban Sexologist, helping women claim and take ownership of their bodies and their own pleasure, helping couples overcome mismatched desire, re-ignite the spark, and unlock previously unexplored pathways to pleasure. Every BODY is deserving of pleasure, but fear, shame, lack of education, and inability to communicate wants and desires get in the way of that. I am excited every day to help people feel confident, unlock what their bodies can do, and get the connection they crave with their partners.
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
My name is Amy Rowan, I am THE Suburban Sexologist. I’ve been blissfully married to my incredible husband, James for almost 20 years. I’m a boy mom, I’ve got 3 wonderful sons, in elementary, middle and high school. I am a breast cancer survivor. I play tennis (poorly) and I’m obsessed with vinegar and fostering kittens.
In 2008, I left corporate America to become a stay at home mom. I discovered direct sales and became an intimacy toy consultant. During my 13 years as an intimacy toy consultant, I was in top 3% of my company and built a $200k team. But the best part was I uncovered my true passion: educating about sexual health and wellness, while supporting my clients with their intimacy concerns.
My passion led me to pursue and complete a 750 Course Hour program at Sex Coach University. When I complete this, by the end of 2023, I will be a Certified Sex Educator from American College of Sexologists International, a Certified Sexologist by American Board of Sexologists, Professional Member of the Association of Somatic & Integrative Sexologists, a member of the World Association of Sexual Health and the World Association of Sex Coaches.
I own Suburban Intimacy where I offer 1:1 talk based intimacy coaching, virtual masterclasses, group workshops, and carry sexologist-curated intimacy products as well as my exclusive “Your Intimacy Journey” Discovery Boxes.
My Discovery Boxes are designed to help you expand your sexual self-awareness, deepen your connection with your partner and uncover new pathways to eroticism. I have experiences for everyone, single or in a relationship.
But I’m also just a sports mom, driving her minivan through the ‘burbs, trying to get her kids to where they need to be. However, I am ALSO the person you can trust to help you with the topics that NO one talks about.
How about pivoting – can you share the story of a time you’ve had to pivot?
Sometimes you realize that dreams that previously fulfilled you, no longer do so. After many years as an intimacy toy consultant, and many more tearful conversations with my clients, I realized that women and couples needed so much more help than I could provide during one evening at a party, or by selling them a product.
My favorite part of what I did as a intimacy consultant was teaching women about their bodies, about what was normal, about what to expect during intimacy. I knew this was my talent and gift, but I wasn’t sure what to do with it, outside of the direct sales world.
When I discovered Sex Coaching, I literally ran to my husband saying “this is it! This is it!” I applied and was accepted into the program. The year that I have spent becoming certified has been both incredibly rewarding and challenging.
There is a lot of overlap between my previous business and my new one, but transitioning from one to another has been an interesting process. I struggle with not being able to serve my existing clientele as I have in the past, while also knowing that this is truly my calling. It has been a lot of fun learning more about my craft, while recognizing the deep need for what I do.
Selling off past inventory, building a new audience, finishing school, creating my new product line, building up local and online visibility, all with a drastic (temporary) reduction in income has been fun, and difficult. But I know its the right path.
So many people are struggling with challenges such as low or no desire, uneven desire in couples, inability to experience orgasm, painful intercourse, lack of bedroom confidence, body image issues, social and dating skills deficits, aversion to touch, communication conflicts and more.
Through personalized coaching, education, and support, I create a safe, sex positive, non-judgmental space where individuals can explore their desires, enhance pleasure, and foster intimate connections.
How do you keep in touch with clients and foster brand loyalty?
In any industry, but especially mine, connecting individually with clients is so important. I do weekly lives in my private Facebook Group “The Pleasure Seekers” where I discuss a sexual education topic. I invite people to connect with me on 1:1 calls. When people purchase products from me, they receive a handwritten thank you note and every package is sent out with a personal touch. I have always believed that if I teach my clients something new and make them laugh, then they will engage with me, join my classes, recommend me to friends and purchase from me. That has not failed me yet.
Contact Info:
- Website: http://www.amy-rowan.com
- Instagram: @amyrowanintimacycoach
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amyrowanintimacycoach
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-rowan-coaching/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-UhOmx51RAQEup1jmXf38w
- Other: https://www.tiktok.com/@amyrowanintimacycoach
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