We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Amy Delira a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Alright, Amy thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. It’s always helpful to hear about times when someone’s had to take a risk – how did they think through the decision, why did they take the risk, and what ended up happening. We’d love to hear about a risk you’ve taken.
In 2020 I took the risk to move from my community mental health career as a therapist into solo private practice and then into running a group practice here at Deeper Roots Wellness. This risk felt huge to me, but I was determined to break the glass ceiling that I felt confined by in both my career and the professional circles and organizations I was part of. I knew I had a lot to offer and to give to the field of perinatal, infant and early childhood mental health and to other clinicians. This has been both a challenging and life changing journey.
I entered the mental health field right out of college knowing that this is the space where I could make my greatest contribution. I spent 10+ years in various organizations within Infant Mental Health Home Visiting programs. I am in love with this work, and my passions to create new ways to do this work and to create spaces for others to do this work kept getting louder. I learned so much from the organizations, peers and families I built relationships along the way, but I yearned for ways to use my energy, my voice and my potential that was being outgrown in the places that I found myself. That’s when I decided to branch out and connect with others who were doing what I hoped to do.
It started as something small (big for me) officially taking on my first few private practice clients. This quickly took an unexpected turn during COVID 19, where I was forced to practice virtually, like most others in this field of mental health therapy. This was so very tricky, as a mom of two little ones who were now my “co-workers” as we all “worked from home”. I was juggling my new private practice role alongside my Community Mental Health Role, alongside my mothering role. Despite the huge pivots that 2020 brought, Deeper Roots Wellness was taking shape and in July 2020 I took the leap to resign from my CMH role, this felt HUGE. I wasn’t sure how things would pan out, but I was leaning into trust. Trusting myself, my vision, my way of seeing the world and my potential. Things were not always easy, many restless days and nights filled with anxiety or worry about the future and sustainability of things. I always came out the other-side of those restless days/nights with new insights, new visions, new ways of seeing both my role as a clinician but also as an emerging business woman. I could have never imagined all that becoming the business woman I am today would have taken, and good thing, because had I known I may have never started. Ignorance is – sometimes- bliss.
As the practice continued to grow, thrive, take its shape, the calling to share this with others could not be ignored. It was constantly on my mind and my heart. I knew this would be another huge risk and step into the unknown for me. I spent months preparing for how I wanted DRW to look as a group practice. I set my foundations and affirmations – to create a space founded in equity, connection and interdependence- for what the practice would stand for and offer to both clinicians and to the families we support. I wanted to offer other women the space to feel seen, heard and supported in their career. To have both the autonomy and connection needed to succeed. To be able to make a sustainable living wage even right out of graduate school and to have work-life balance, if there is such a thing! And, in 2021, I hired DRWs first clinician. I was dancing in the dark, but I was so excited to welcome an amazing woman and mother to the team who I knew would flourish and support the DRW dream.
This was an enormous learning curve for me, it felt like risk after risk, and learning curve after learning curve. I have failed along the way, fallen and gotten back up, sometimes gracefully, sometimes not. At the end of 2021, I took the leap to find a physical location, despite the unknowns of COVID. This was another huge risk, so many people were still very uncomfortable with being “in person” again. But I listened to that deeper knowing, I found a space to call home for DRW. It needed work and love, I agreed to a space bigger than what I had imagined, it wasn’t ready to be a therapy office, so I stepped into another unknown of a full buildout. This all felt foreign, I had never known anyone who had done this before, and don’t have family who have ventured into business in this way. I was nervous, I second guessed myself all of the time, and yet I continued to take imperfect action. I designed the office in a way that I felt best honored the work we would do here and the space we needed. I again trusted that inner voice, trusted that if we build this, it will work out.
Our space is beautiful, it holds our work and the relationships we share in ways that support us and those we care for, support and connect with. In 2022 I hired four more talented, passionate and amazing women. The clinicians that have chosen to be a part of DRW make this space what it is. We are fully human here, we are always growing, learning and finding our way together. Somedays this is a space to seek refuge, other days it is a space to deepen our understanding of how to be together in ways that honor us as individuals and as a collective. I trust in my own process, the process of others and our shared process. I trust in the mission and vision of DRW and come back to those values to guide me in this work. I have worked hard, and persistently to create this space, it hasn’t been perfect, I have been challenged, burnt out at times and have wondered about how and if it is translating in the way that I had hoped. I think it will always be a work in progress, I am always evolving and as I know better I do better. Everyday feels like a risk in some way, but it’s a risk worth taking. What we are doing here is important, the relationships we are building matter and the impact we have in the community is valuable.
As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?
I’ll start with my fixed social identities– I’m a white, able-bodied, cis-gendered woman. My pronouns are she/her/hers. I identify with my Italian roots most due to the way I was raised and who I was raised by, however my ancestors came from all over Europe. I understand my privileges in this society and in this country as a white woman and I try to keep this at the forefront of my self-awareness. I am the mother of two beautiful children and a partner to my awesome husband (and best friend).
Who I am and where I’ve come from is how I got into the work I currently do. I’m the daughter of a single mother, the middle child out of the three of us, and the one who observed how and what this all meant, from a very young age. I made meaning of things as a child that I couldn’t have possibly fully understood but that I was in some ways wise to beyond my years. I absorbed the emotional experiences of those around me as a child, this built my foundation for empathy and compassion. As an adult I’ve been able to hone this skill into healthy ways of connecting and helping others, but as a child this was a burden I carried. These burdens are also my superpower. I knew from a young age I wanted to support young children and families, as I grew up I knew this would be in the role of a therapist. Being a therapist has always been who I am in some ways, it’s the place where I can make the greatest contribution to others and to my community.
I had my own rough patches in life, working out my own trauma in early adulthood, while simultaneously navigating grad school, full time work and clinical internships. Sleepless nights completing coursework, full time waitressing to pay my way, and internships to develop in my clinical skills. My traumas and my struggles bring me closer to the humanity in myself and in all of us.
I have a way of seeing the world that doesn’t always make sense to others, but is none the less valid. I’m a deep feeler, a highly sensitive human, I often know things before I think them, and sometimes I don’t have words for the things I know, I’ve learned to appreciate this in myself. I understand there are others out there that have similar experiences. It can sometimes feel isolating, or even unacceptable to understand the world in this way, especially in a world that conditions us toward the agenda of always doing things, productivity, patriarchy and capitalism.
Being a perinatal, infant and early childhood mental health psychotherapist, trainer and reflective mentor suits me and my way of being/seeing/feeling in the world. Once I took the steps to become a clinician I have never looked back. Even through the years when it felt hard, or impossible to do this work, I persisted, because there is something bigger than me at work in all of this. I have had the pleasure of sitting with mothers, caregivers, babies, young children, their stories, their hardships, and being in connection with them as they rose from and grew from all that they have survived. I get to be with people in a way that lets them know its okay to feel the hard things, to talk about the hard things, to play about the hard things and to find a new way forward that is healthier and more connected.
I support moms, dads, caregivers and their young children as they find connection and emotional wellness. Families come to me and to Deeper Roots Wellness for various reasons, but a common theme I find is that disconnection (trauma) from self and others is at the root of what causes people pain. Through my relationship with others I help them see their own wisdom in a new way, reflecting what’s already there back to them in ways that sometimes they can no longer see, I help them connect to themselves, and remember their innate wholeness. I support parents and young children in strengthening their relationships, through play, connection and finding ways to be with each other that honor autonomy and connection. I’m a holding space for new parents, grieving parents and parents who feel lost or alone in their role. I help parents see how what they’ve been through impacts them and their little ones, that what the parent goes through, the child also goes through, and that everyone deserves support on this journey.
I think myself and the other clinicians at Deeper Roots Wellness are unique because of our focus on the relational experiences between ourselves and our clients, our clients and their children, and the relationships of the past that show up in the present and how each of these relationships impact the present. Every client we meet has the capacity for healing and has the wisdom in them to work through whatever it is that is currently causing them pain. We are the mirrors, reflecting this wisdom back to our clients so that they can find their ways back to themselves and to each other.
In addition to my clinical work with families I provide training and supervision to other clinicians to support clinical growth. And at DRW we offer an array of specialized services such as perinatal, postpartum, maternal, infant and early childhood mental health therapy services. Additionally, we offer Infant and Early Childhood mental health consultation in child care settings and to other birth and family professionals. Each of our clinicians have specialized training and experience to support this vital period of pregnancy through early childhood. We also work with early childhood clinicians and practitioners across the state through individual and reflective consultation.
Deeper Roots Wellness honors the transformative power of human connection and we work to practice from a place of cultural and relational attunement. It was founded with the belief that we each deserve to be heard, to be well, and to have the support we need as we navigate the ups and downs of life, love, and parenthood. We strive to offer equitable and holistic support to families through therapeutic services that promote relational health & prioritize well-being all throughout pregnancy, early childhood, and through the lifespan. We aspire to create lasting systemic change by prioritizing healthy relationships, fostering optimal mental health and development, and promoting resilience within the families and communities we serve. The name ‘Deeper Roots Wellness’ is a reminder that we need deep, healthy roots in connection with others and the world around us to survive and thrive.
Other than training/knowledge, what do you think is most helpful for succeeding in your field?
To succeed in this field clinicians need to be doing their own healing work and working towards deeper self-understanding and self-discovery. I believe we can only take our clients as far as we are willing to go with ourselves, so if we aren’t in therapy or healing spaces ourselves, or looking internally at our own disconnections, traumas, difficulties, biases it will be very difficult to authentically support another person in their healing. We have to be willing to look at our own shadows, build relationships with all the parts of ourselves that we’ve been taught to repress, discard, project onto others in order to truly step into our wholeness. This isn’t easy, but I do believe it is necessary if we want to support our clients in doing the same.
I also believe being open to ongoing learning, growth and innovation is so important. Learning from the stories and experiences of others, staying out of the role of “Expert” and trusting that we each hold what we need to heal and grow. If we can keep this stance, we can release the tension that comes with needing to always have the right answer or the perfect intervention, and rather step into our highest potential to support others.
How do you keep your team’s morale high?
I am still learning what it means to be a great leader, and perhaps this will always be a work in progress. I think some of what I strive to embody is a culture of collaboration, shared leadership, autonomy and strong value on the wisdom within our shared and diverse identities and experiences. I lean on trust and honesty. I value the power of relationships and believe developing relationships with the other clinicians at my practice are at the foundation. I don’t always get it right, and I work towards repair when I’ve misstepped, which allows us the opportunity to deepen our connections. As a leader in my practice I hold myself accountable to ongoing self reflection, bringing the hard thing to the table when I have the words for it and listening to the feedback I receive from others. I work hard to honor differing perspectives and value those I work with highly. By leading with autonomy and connection, it allows those who work with me to make the best decisions for themselves and for their families. Given that I work with women who are also juggling the demands of parenting, we all have different puzzles we are trying to make fit and I work to make sure the practice policies and workflow offer options and the ability for clinicians to make the best choices for themselves based on each of their unique needs and desires in the work. I also offer opportunities for continued education, learning, specialization and growth within our field. I think all of these things together lend themselves towards high morale.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.deeperrootswellness.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deeperrootswellness/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DeeperRootsWellness/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-delira-deeperrootswellness/
Image Credits
Heather Nash Photography (Author Headshots only)