We were lucky to catch up with Alexia Antoine recently and have shared our conversation below.
Alexia, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. Was there a moment in your career that meaningfully altered your trajectory? If so, we’d love to hear the backstory.
I never knew how stubborn depression could be until I dealt with it from age 15 to 27.
I grew up as an only child, while watching my family unit fall apart at the hands of a supposed family friend.
We had no older generation as a voice of wisdom and there was no intervention to be found, so depression had perfect conditions to grow.
After college, I had a degree, but no confidence, or knowledge of how to get started with adult life.
I experienced failure to launch, and depended financially on my mother well into my late twenties.
While I waited for the depression to go away, the shame only grew worse.
So I did what I knew how to do. I got lost in books.
I logged onto my Dallas Public Library account and made several online book reservations because I craved on-demand guidance from a mentor.
I searched for the first Personal Development book I’d ever read and reserved it for library pickup.
Since I had no car at the time, that meant taking the bus , or if I was feeling fed up & adventurous, traveling on foot.
I began with Staci Eldredge’s book Becoming Myself and once I lifted that grass-green hardcover it was only three days before I read the whole thing.
I felt better for a few minutes, but that heavy feeling sunk back in shortly after.
So, I reached for the next book in the pile.
Same thing. Then the next, and the next.
Five books in.
I felt a little better, and I didn’t get that sinking feeling as fast, but it was still there.
I noticed that as long as I kept reading, my brain was in a good space.
So I read as if the quality of my life depended on it, to where my hunger for information surpassed my hunger for food and I’d forget to eat until dinner time, for a week. I’d eat dinner each day.
Then something amazing happened. My brain started to help me out by rewiring so that when I focused on uplifting things, my mood stayed uplifted a little longer than before.
On my 18th book within that month, the down feeling was gone. I was self-aware, encouraged, and more creative than I’d ever been before. Problems seemed more like opportunities that me being denied.
I began to journal, and became obsessed with the pursuit of focus and Purpose.
Journaling became a powerful recharge and sounding board where I got a grasp on my essence, how I think, and how I respond to life.
A lot of my personal development happened here and it’s where I got my laser focus.
It helped me begin to live up to my name. My name, Alexia means “Defender of Mankind”.
This growth led to beautiful moments and memories I became open to.
Little did I know that this clarity would cause my personal life to come together further.
One of the things I wrote one year was that I’d get out of my regular environment and go somewhere for a little while, all expenses paid.
I didn’t know how it would happen for me. But in December 2018, I received an invitation from my older Grenadian-Canadian biological sister (whom I’d never met) to spend Christmas with her, my Jamaican Brother-in-International-Law (as I like to call him), my oldest sister, two nieces and four nephews.
We’d only talked over the phone for a number of months.
That kind of makes me like a long-lost little sister for 28 years!
*But this validated what I had doubted for way too long: that my brain is powerful and can bring results in my environment.
The first moment I put a name to what I’d been able to do with my brain was in 2017 mid-session in front of a client.
I didn’t know I’d done it, until that same client read my words back to me the next week. She was in her 60s and fulfilled in every life area but one.
She had the brightest eyes, and had clearly been living a consistently vibrant life, but the light was starting to fade.
I’d told her about how she could anchor her mind upward and beat the despair by priming her brain with pre-set decisions that freed her up to adapt to what comes her way.
I explained to her how doing this would rewire her neural pathways and train her brain in such a way that deprives her brain’s distress highway that she’d built from years of stress.
The next week she read aloud the notes she’d taken on her iPad. Four words jumped out at me as she read them: “anchor the mind upward”.
Those were my exact words the week before!
That connected the dots for me.
So, I created Upward Anchor!
Before my Upward Anchor time, clients kept pulling the coaching out of me! Million-dollar real estate and sales company owners came to me to straighten out their culture issues amongst employees and leadership within their company. A leader undertaking a large and historic renovation of a building sought strategy on how to navigate the emotionally-charged nature of the project, along with planning strategy.
The questions kept coming!
As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?
Upward Anchor is a concierge-style Professional Counseling and Transformational Coaching agency that provide virtual services for you to stay in the comfort of your home or office. We create high-performance strategies for life and business using Professional Counseling and Transformational Caching geared toward life and business success.
Upward Anchor uses different language, like the greeting “Hello Fellow Person” to acknowledge togetherness and mutual accountability. You’ll find different language in session with both Counseling and Coaching. I’m here to galvanize clients into thinkers on a whole new level.
It’s not enough to merely help you resolve issues that plagued your peace. As you heal, we can prep you to direct your freed attention to that thing the world is waiting on you to bring to the table.
Are there any books, videos, essays or other resources that have significantly impacted your management and entrepreneurial thinking and philosophy?
I’m a true bibliophile (book lover), so I can’t escape a good book.
JK Lasser’s Small Business Taxes gave me a crash course on the considerations to take on the financial side.
Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi with Tahl Raz and was a real stretch, but showed me the importance of speaking to people I never would have approached in the networking settings.
Up From Nothing by John Hope Bryant taught me the importance of relationships and maintaining connections with those met along the way.
I’m currently reading The Five Dysfunctions of a Team and I can feel my brain rewiring yet again!
As for videos, Dr. Cindy Trimm’s video by the name of “The Extravagant Mind” is a reminder of the levels of thought that are still untapped, where uncanny levels of genius occur.
Her earlier series titled “The DNA of Destiny” speaks on the very thing I actively aim to do: get people attuned to unlocking that purpose place in the earth that they’re uniquely assigned to.
Training and knowledge matter of course, but beyond that what do you think matters most in terms of succeeding in your field?
For Professional Counseling in particular, when you have enough of a sense of humor to help the person not feel alone, it goes a long way.
I’ve found that most of the time, people are saying what they know how to say, but their needs are more than they have the capacity at the moment to express.
When you can see past what they’re telling you and bringing your observation to their attention, the person breathes a sigh of relief, because you have the insight and foresight to address everything that contributes to the matter they came to you to better manage or overcome.
In a nutshell, having a depth of insight and a mind for strategy that goes beyond technique, usually coming from a struggle and victory of your own.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.alexiaantoine.com/services
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/upward_anchor/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AlexiaAntoineWriter/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alexia-antoine/
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/UpwardAnchor
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@upwardanchor
- Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/biz/upward-anchor-therapy-and-personal-development-plano
- Other: Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/upward-anchor-arlington-tx/1078965
Image Credits
Not applicable