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Meet Ainka J. Fulani

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Meet Ainka J. Fulani

March 13, 2023
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We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Ainka J. Fulani. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Ainka J. below.

Hi Ainka J., thanks for joining us today. What’s the backstory behind how you came up with the idea for your business?
When I started BreakThrough Coaching in 2008 as I was working in Career Services at a business school, supporting full-time, part-time and executive MBAs in the area of professional development and advising. Increasingly, students were raising concerns around things in their life that impacted, yet were not narrowly defined as, “the job search.” This included questions around how to manage lack of sleep, stomach pain, hair loss and chronic medical conditions in the workplace, as well as how to navigate the needs of parents and children in their lives who also, had need for their time and attention.
At the same time, I had family members dealing with numerous health issues. I had already begun a personal journey focused on health and wellness. I wanted to learn more about the connection between lifestyle, habits and practices that could circumvent the pre-conceived notion that certain populations are just destined to have things like high-blood pressure, high cholesterol, and diabetes – people like me. Black women are disproportionately adversely affected by heart disease. Ongoing stress and trauma – not just single episodic incidents – that we now term microaggressions, have an impact on our overall health. There was no term “microaggressions,” in the mainstream back then. Today, there is plenty of discussion about how our physical and emotional wellbeing intersect.
Now it may seem obvious, yet when I talked about creating a wholistic coaching practice that focused on the whole person back then, many suggested that I had to choose between working with people on their “minds” or on their “bodies.” I insisted that paying attention to the needs of the whole person would better equip people to do the things in life, personally and professionally, that they set out to do. It seems somewhat silly now that this was even a question, especially as so many personally training certifications now offer “coaching’ training around mindset, mindfulness and human behavior patterns. And numerous coaching certifications now offer, as a requirement, some teachings around the physical manifestations of emotions and stress and very simple movements or breathing exercises to address them.

Ainka J., love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?
When I decided to start my own coaching practice, I decided to expand my knowledge and experience beyond my many years of work in various industries and my professional training as a Human Resource Generalist, MBA, and Life Performance Coach. I had been deeply enmeshed in advising, counseling, coaching work, all of which I know is important and I wanted to elevate and expand what I had to offer by bringing in other elements of who we are – a somatic, or “of the body” experience. I got certified in Pilates, as a personal trainer, a yoga teacher and then as a Yoga Therapist. I spent many years working solely in those movement arenas while I continued to study anatomy and physiology with a particular focus on the brain, trauma and grief.
Some may call me an Executive Coach, a Leadership Coach, a Wellness Coach, a Career Coach, a Life Coach. I think it depends on what one comes to me to find support for. Essentially, I am a problem solver and an optimizer. I am a coach and a consultant, for organizations and individuals, promoting excellence, efficiency and effectiveness, while keeping a “whole person” approach at the forefront. I’ve often said that I help people get closer to their bliss.
This looks differently, for different engagements, at any given time. For example, I’ve worked with a number of organizations during periods of rapid growth, and

rapid change, to help keep them on track to achieve their strategic goals, while providing support so that the employees can do their best work and avoid burnout. An organization doubling in size doesn’t have to be negatively disrupted! During the height of the Global Pandemic much of the work that I’ve done has been helping leaders create strong teams, camaraderie, and dare I say it, professional intimacy – something I think is essential in the healthiest organizations. I find it nourishing to keynote or speak on panels, lead workshops and facilitate offsites, as the questions and discussions are often thought provoking and the energy stimulating when people are learning in community.

With individuals, the work can be focused on finding a job and/or managing a career. It could be one-on-one support pre-and post needs for a surgery, teaching a class on balance to prevent falls, or an introduction to meditation series. While the content of the work may vary, the common practice is meeting people where they are, with a customized approach and helping them to recognize and build upon their strengths. I help to create nurturing environments, where there is space for all of our senses and emotions to be acknowledged – intuition can be a powerful tool. I guide the process of creating a bridge between lofty goals and dreams and the tangible, tactical activities necessary to execute on a plan.
I’ve had clients call me “lovingly demanding,” and I think that is accurate. The rigor involved in creating best-in-class organizations or daring to pursue the life that one desires, can be a process that promotes learning, fueled by curiosity, and playfulness. It doesn’t have to be arduous. We can take the assignment, if you will, seriously, without taking ourselves too seriously and that allows for a heightened level of creativity and exponentially increases the number of possible positive outcomes.

We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.

 

Sometimes I think “WOW” when I consider how long BreakThrough Coaching has been around. There have been periods where the business had to slow down, as personal priorities came to the forefront, yet I am still here and still doing business. In my efforts to conceive a Child I experienced multiple medical complications and surgeries, in spite of what would be called a healthy lifestyle. For a time I wondered if I could or should even try to continue advising others when I was finding things so challenging for myself, in my efforts to create the life I desired in terms of building my family. A wise Friend (yes, I purposely capitalize “Child” and “Friend”) reminded me that my work has always been grounded in being authentic, direct and letting the feelings be felt and expressed. This was an opportunity to bring my own experiences to bear in a new way. Not that each engagement or discussion would suddenly be about my struggles, but that I could use my experiences to tap into a deeper level of sympathy and empathy that could serve clients even more. I could serve as a very present living example that our feelings, while very real and needing to be acknowledged and respected, don’t have to determine our actions – we can be sad, angry, disappointed, etc., and not swallow those feelings or wallow in them – there are infinite ways to respond to how we feel. We have agency to determine how we act and what we do, regardless of how we feel.

I’ve come to strongly recognize that for some of us resilience is an essential part of who we are AND that it can be nurtured and developed in all of us, by the nourishment that we choose – laughter, rest, play, dance, quiet time, spending time in nature, spending time with loved ones, intellectual challenge, creating art, whatever it is – and it is our responsibility, if we want to thrive and have longevity, we must to find what those things are that fill our reserves and experience them with some regularity.

What do you think helped you build your reputation within your market?

Whether I am teaching a yoga class or facilitating a team building exercise, I am me. I often process aloud, inject my observations with questions and humor and assume that who I am working with is giving me their best effort.

I remember listening to a professional on a panel at the National Black MBA Conference recalling our conversation, about a decade earlier, when I let them know that they would not be receiving a summer offer. In their telling they focused on my asking them if they were open to feedback. They focused on my suggestions for what would make them a better candidate in their next set of interviews. They thanked me for being candid and caring, as were it not for the “ding” they wouldn’t have had the opportunity to work and grow where they ended up employed. This is also very much me.

I like to describe myself as a Type “A” in remission, a perfectionist in reform. What that means to me at this stage in my life is that I work hard for my clients, understand their motivations to achieve and can see the bigger picture. I can help them to see it too. I have never been one to shy away from emotions or difficult conversations and have always supported others to build the skills to express themselves, including their vulnerability, and to have the courage for direct communication.

When and how appropriate, I share my own experiences, including my struggles and vulnerabilities. And I share my wonder, my awe at the creative possibilities that humans can create when they are working together and working for something good. My energy, honesty and enthusiasm are motivating. And folks who work with me notice the difference in their own lives, even after one coaching session, one class, one workshop. I don’t over promise. Yet, I do deliver.

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Image Credits
Paul Salemme, Melina Meza

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