Today we’d like to introduce you to Cara Matsukane-Ho.

Hi Cara, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today?
My story to creating Matsu Love can be defined by three main experiences:

FIRST, I became conscious – I woke up. Before that moment, I was sleep walking through life. I was often a victim of my circumstances, and didn’t do much self-reflecting outside of worrying about what others thought of me. I didn’t understand or experience the ways in which what I ate and drank impacted me physically and emotionally. My life and my own forward motion was on auto-pilot in the direction that society and other people’s opinions were pointing me in, and I didn’t question that. I was numbing myself so that I didn’t have to feel “negative” emotions. I was trying to fit in but didn’t know what true belonging was like. I projected a version of self that I thought other people wanted, and it left me feeling really insecure and ungrounded because that changed depending on who I was with. In July 2014, I confronted my alcoholism and got sober.

After getting sober, I started to notice how things made me feel – both physically and emotionally. I got reconnected to whole food and started to feel good in my body and have boundaries – choosing things that felt good and avoiding things that felt bad. I started to understand my own psychology and how human beings work. Perhaps most significantly, I started to understand, unpack and heal the experiences of my child-self, and I discovered that navigating the confusing and painful landscape of what it is to be a human being in today’s society was difficult for everyone, not just me.

I had several profound spiritual experiences. I got connected to a Higher Power in big ways and small, daily ways, and started to trust God and relinquish control of my own life to the flow of the universe. I learned to live with the discomfort of less certainty, and surrendered more to what is. My prayers changed from laundry lists of things I wanted to a simple, “Please guide me. Show me how to be of service to others.”

I quit my job in the corporate world and pursued my passions. This included food and cooking, (I became a professional cook for a few years in a health food kitchen in Boulder, CO.) personal development, and empowering others to live a conscious, loving, and purposeful life. I moved from a state of being unconscious, resigned and cynical about people and the world to being a bright light of unconditional love and hope.

SECOND, I became an Aunt. I LOVE being an aunt. Prior to my first nephew being born, I was pretty disinterested in children – mostly because I was intimidated by them. I was afraid of their rejection, so I just didn’t engage with them. When I became an aunt, I got SO intrigued by children. I learned I was good with them, and what made me good with them was all the inner work I was doing to heal and expand my self-expression beyond past patterns.

I found I had a passion for teaching children the things that I had to learn in my late 20s and early 30s: emotional regulation, self-soothing, boundaries and self-trust. I realized that how we raise children and create space for them to discover themselves has a significant impact on their adult life: their well-being, relationships and self-esteem.

I also connected this important inner work with a brighter society – one where mature, healed, self-trusting adults could live and work together to create something beautiful. As I was doing my own inner child work, I could see the inner children in the people on the news – the people who were committing crimes, causing dissension in politics and leading companies and cultures from a place of fear and survival instead of love and abundance. I saw that impacting how children experience themselves and the adults around them meant impacting the society we create in the future.

THIRD, I wanted to nourish the nourishers. As my three sisters and many friends became mothers, I saw them all struggle with the same things: becoming mothers and losing their own personal identity, feeling guilty any time they did anything for themselves, complete overwhelm and an inability to get it all done, burnout, stress and physical illness. I realized that the way our current society, households, and social patters are designed are not conducive to the wellness of mothers. In fact, it’s quite the opposite: social patterns and norms are actively harming them – women and mothers are socially rewarded for self-sacrificing and putting everyone else before their own wellness and needs. Mothers need community, they need support, they need space and time to heal and take care of themselves.

There is no greater power in the world than the love of a mother. I believe it is what the world needs to heal.

Heart-centered, healthy, and creative children are the key to a thriving society. The single strongest indicator of children who thrive as adults is the quality of their mother’s happiness. More so than the marital status of their parents, income, or style of parenting.

So many mothers suffer from depression, exhaustion, and stress – they are socially rewarded to self-sacrifice, and they experience a loss of identity after becoming new mothers, then feel guilty when being a mother isn’t enough.

My mission with Matsu Love is to guide women back to their inherent joy, resilience, and wellness through holistic principles and practices so they can raise a thriving society – one that is made up of self-guided, emotionally intelligent, connected leaders. That future starts with mothers and how they take care of themselves.

I believe that if you want to change the world, learning how to take care of yourself and do your inner work is the key. Matsu Love is the space for mothers to take on this important work – Motherhood As Activism.

Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
Absolutely not! I do not think anything worth pursuing is a smooth road, and there have definitely been many struggles over the past year and a half.

While building Matsu Love, I have experienced financial insecurity, a lack of clarity in pretty much everything about my business including my mission and my ideal client, I’ve had many, many moments of self-doubt and intense fear of putting myself out there, and a lot of worry about what others would think of what I am doing. I’ve experienced a LOT of imposter syndrome and I have to keep setting it aside.

I have had to confront the difference between my desires and dreams and the capacity I have to execute them. I’ve had to learn to be patient and take things slowly, and build things over time vs. expecting immediate success. Building a business has taught me about delayed gratification.

I’ve also learned how to set aside my perfectionism and just get something out into the world and iterate. Public trial and error can be really daunting and even embarrassing at times, so I’ve had to set aside my ego and just work on practicing, trying things out, and being ready to pivot when something doesn’t work. I’ve also had to learn to stop comparing myself to people who have been disciplined and working at their craft for much longer than I have been and just focus on taking the next aligned action that is best for me.

My faith has been tested – I’ve had to check in with my Higher Power over and over again to make sure what I am doing is the right path for me. I’ve had to rely on financial and emotional support from friends, family, and my husband. I am so grateful to be surrounded with people who want me to succeed, validate what I’m doing, and support me through the hard times – I know not everyone has that.

I’ve also been in a near-constant inquiry of: Is this really what I want? Do I want to dedicate myself to this and do I have the energy and discipline to do the work it would take to have a successful business? I still don’t have the answer to that question, but for today I am not quitting – so I will keep going just for today, and I will ask myself again tomorrow.

I am lucky to have many coaches and guides who have helped me design my business and overcome personal barriers to my success. Shoutout to Jeff Willmore (The Autonomy Course), Dr. Caite Gordon (1:1 Coaching & Nectar community), and Elizabeth Winheld (WINC 90-Day Program) for their programs and coaching which have been instrumental in my growth.

Appreciate you sharing that. What should we know about Matsu Love?
Matsu Love exists to create a thriving society by raising a generation of self-guided, heart-centered, and creative leaders, one mother at a time. We accomplish this mission through community membership, wellness programs, and 1:1 holistic wellness guidance for mothers.

Our society tends to reward women and mothers for self-sacrificing behavior.

When women become mothers, they often struggle with depression, identity crises, and overall stress and exhaustion, feeling completely depleted and under-resourced while trying to put their children and family first.

Studies have shown that a mother’s happiness is the SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT predictor of the stability of the family and a child’s ability to thrive as an adult.

All of my offerings are geared towards creating lasting and sustainable wellness and happiness for mothers.
Your job is to raise our future society – it is the single most important job for a better world.

My offerings are for:

– Women who look around the world and feel dissatisfied and concerned about the state of politics, business, consumerism, media, and collective values.

-Mothers of young children who feel exhausted and anxious and want to show up as their best selves for their children.

-Women who are committed to doing their own inner work and heal from their childhood so they provide a safe and loving household for their children.

-Women who are committed to being cycle-breakers for their families.

-Conscious women who either have a spiritual life or desire a relationship with spirituality.

-Women who hold the possibility of a better world for our future generations in their hearts and want to stand together for a society centered in love.

I specialize in self-healing by learning how to resource yourself, regulate your nervous system, and reconnect with your intuition so you can live a self-guided life full of purpose and joy and model that kind of life for your children.

Right now, I have three primary offerings:

The Joyful Village: A monthly membership with a community of mothers committed to creating a better world.Through monthly workshops, holistic wellness content, and community, you will explore ways to resource yourself and your children and cultivate more joy in your day-to-day experience as a mom.

The Joyful Mother: Group coaching through a 3-Month structured program with accountability where you’ll design your own wellness plan to overcome exhaustion, anxiety and emotional triggers and cultivate joy.

The Radiant Woman: 1:1 guidance through a 6-Month customized deep dive into physical, mental, and emotional healing. This intimate container is for women who are courageous enough to do deep inner work and healing to access their light for others and the world.

If you are interested in getting involved, start with The Joyful Village. It is a no-obligation commitment. You can try out a month with us and if it’s not a good fit for you, you can cancel anytime.

What was your favorite childhood memory?
I was probably about 7 or 8. My mom and two older sisters were away for the weekend at Girl Scout camp. My dad stayed home with me and my little sister, Regan. We watched Back to the Future in my parents room, and Regan fell asleep. My dad took me downstairs for a “midnight snack.” I felt so mature and so special having a late night snack, just me and my dad.

Pricing:

• $55

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.matsulove.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matsu.love
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/matsulove1

Image Credits
Katie Todd Photography