We recently connected with Jessica Rose and have shared our conversation below.
Jessica , looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. What’s been the most meaningful project you’ve worked on?
Performing has always set my soul on fire, ever since I was a little girl. There is so much I love about acting and getting to live a creative life, but I think the hardest part is that my passion is kind of entangled in an industry of gatekeepers. When you’re an auditioning actor, you rarely have say on the kinds of roles and projects you’re cast in, and you certainly have little control over when you get to do it. While artists, musicians, and writers can continue to do their craft regardless of who is giving them a job, actors often feel like the expression of our creative gifts is dictated by other people. For many years, trying to figure out where I fit within the industry felt disempowering, and it kind of warped my relationships to acting itself. The roles I landed weren’t always meaningful to me, and I hated that I couldn’t call the shots. I felt like I was capable of so much more.
Looking back, I’m actually grateful for the frustration, because it pushed me to start creating my own work. And not only did it shift the trajectory of my career, it also taught me I’m more capable and creative in my artistry than I knew. I really understand the frustration many actors feel when told to wear different hats: Why should we have to be writers and producers when we’re trained as actors? I felt that way too. In fact, the first short film I produced, I approached a TV writer, Karen Kicak — who later went on to have a wildly successful career as a writer and producer on Workin’ Moms — and asked her if she would write me a short script. She did(!), and we ended up making a sweet short film called Frozen Marbles. There are so many ways to collaborate and create in the way that works for you. It was so empowering to finally be able to ask myself: “What roles do I really want to play? What stories do I want to tell?” I ended up receiving my first acting award for that film.
A couple of years later, I wrote, produced, acted, and edited another short film called Alison (https://vimeo.com/213100067). My partner at the time was the director, and we shot it in one day—I think our budget for the whole thing was under a thousand bucks. I have a vivid memory of editing the film and thinking to myself “This is the most creatively fulfilled I have ever felt.” Seeing words I had written on a page come to life in this very beautiful way—there’s nothing like it. It’s easy to forget that I have agency and slip back into the industry hustle from time to time, but when I remember that I’m in charge of my own life and can create on my terms, that’s when the journey becomes truly meaningful. Alison went on to become a Vimeo Staff Pick and go viral online, opening doors for me I never imagined—including my move to Los Angeles. Nowadays, it’s easier than ever to make your own work. With so many platforms to self-create and easy access to affordable equipment, no one gets to dictate what we’re capable of doing.
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
I’m an actress, writer, filmmaker, podcaster, and more recently, a human design reader and life coach. For a long time, I thought I had to “pick a lane,” but I’ve never met a human being who didn’t have a multitude of gifts — and they all deserve the chance to be fully realized (recently my co-podcaster said, “Welcome to the party, all of Jess!”). I’m really excited these days about weaving together this beautiful career with all my varied passions that allow me to be my whole, multi-faceted self. Especially as an actress, it feels fulfilling and more balanced to be excited about every facet of my life, even during moments of uncertainty between gigs.
I do think there’s a singular thread that ties together everything I do: I’m obsessed with the human condition. I love learning and understanding what makes us human. I’m fascinated by the stories we tell each other and ourselves — and how those stories can inspire and connect us, and also sometimes limit us. And because I’ve learned so much from the pursuit of my own dreams, I’m passionate about supporting others to realize theirs too.
My first love was acting. As soon as I could walk and talk, I was performing. I booked my first professional role at the age of nine, and I still get the same exhilaration from performing now as I did back then. Over the years, as I’ve leaned into making my own work more and more, my passion has also expanded to include all aspects of filmmaking. Lately, I’ve been re-engaged with screenwriting — I’m finishing up a pilot script that I’m co-writing with a friend, and working through other passion projects I’ve been dreaming up for a while.
I really never thought I’d do anything else but be an actress, but a few years ago, in the midst of a huge upheaval in my personal life, I unexpectedly came across Human Design. While Human Design has since become relatively mainstream, at the time it was extremely obscure — there was almost no information online at all. Similar to astrology, Human Design uses your birth information and gives you a chart that I like to refer to as the “snapshot of your authentic self.” It helps you understand who you are, why you are the way you are, how you are here to exchange energy with the world, what your essence wants to bring forth into the world, and how to authentically make decisions. When I dissected my chart, nothing else had ever articulated my soul and the deepest parts of myself with more specificity and clarity. I became obsessed: I spent hundreds of hours reading through obscure documents and books to understand how to read my chart. And suddenly, friends were asking me to read theirs too. I had no idea that I was stumbling into a whole new chapter of my life. As things snowballed, what surprised me even more was my passion for what I call “integration” — essentially guiding and coaching individuals in synthesizing the insights from their human design charts into their lives. This involves a deep dive into their conditioned narratives, patterns, fears, and unrealized dreams, and nurturing a process of helping them reconnect with their authentic selves. I’m so in love with this work, and it’s also been incredibly supportive to the artist side of me that I get to plunge into the depths of the human experience in this way.
Finally, this past year, my friend Melissa Bauknight and I created a podcast called Inner Rebel, which feels like a beautiful convergence of these two different aspects of my life, my creativity and human design coaching work. We are having incredible conversations with visionaries and game-changers about what it really takes to pursue unconventional dreams. The learning curve was steep (um, who knew how much work a podcast could be?!) but it’s been one of the most gratifying experiences of my life. Anyone who knows me knows my love for probing questions and deep conversation — and now I get to do it ALL THE TIME! With some of the most inspiring people I’ve ever met. Pinch me.
What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?
Oh gosh, so many. I think the biggest one I had to learn was letting go of timelines and traditional markers of success. Even though I was always artsy and “free spirited”, I also had this really controlling, Type-A, perfectionist, shadowy side to me too. My dreams have always been big, but I was also very rigid about them, and all my self-worth was wrapped up in everything going to plan. We all have trauma and conditioning, and I dealt with mine trying to control my life. I had a deep need to prove myself, and I was always beating myself up when things weren’t happening as fast as I had pre-determined they should.
I had to unlearn this one the hard way. If you’re not living in authenticity and you have big dreams, the universe has a way of intervening. It starts with little nudges and whispers (“something doesn’t feel right here…”), but if you keep ignoring them like I did, eventually it drops a seismic bomb. In one fell swoop, I lost everything: the most important relationship of my life came to an unexpected end, I found myself in a new country alone with no support system and no home, lost all my financial stability — everything I had built my life and identity around completely dismantled. And even as I was sitting in the rubble, I STILL couldn’t loosen my grip — I was kicking and screaming and still trying to bend reality to my will.
It took me a long time to sift through my grief and let go. But when I did, life started to open up so many new possibilities and avenues I could never have dreamed of. This was absolutely the hardest thing I have ever lived through, and I can’t even say I’m entirely on the other side — but I love when it’s reflected back to me what a radically different person I now am. I am so much more open to the gifts of unpredictability and surprise. I can now see the magic in the fluidity and chaos of life. I’ve experienced so many adventures, opportunities , and friendships that I would have otherwise missed. I’ve found completely new parts of myself, and I feel in service in a way I had always longed to be. My heart is still tender, but so many magical things have come into my life through this, and it led me to doing work that feels like such a deep part of my purpose.
I know it’s cliche, but sometimes we need to lose ourselves to find ourselves. We get taken on detour that might seems like setbacks, but in my experience are actually rerouting us to something even more meaningful.
For you, what’s the most rewarding aspect of being a creative?
When I think about it from a personal standpoint, one of the most rewarding aspects of being an artist is that it keeps my inner child vibrant and alive. Creativity asks us to cherish our imagination, embrace playfulness, take risks, think unconventionally, get silly, trust our intuition, and remain curious about the world around us. It’s so easy in the grind of adulthood and responsibility to lose touch with these intrinsic parts of ourselves and forget what makes life genuinely magical. People tell me all the time how young I look for my age…. maybe it’s good genes? Or maybe it’s my creative spirit that keeps me young?
Beyond that, the biggest reward is in the potential to create work that stimulates deeper conversations and catalyzes meaningful change. I don’t mean to sound self-aggrandizing and I don’t ever assume my work will do so, but I believe all artists have the hope that something within our work will resonate in a broader way. Even laughing at a silly comedy is a moment of catharsis and connection. We live and learn through story, and so telling stories is such a powerful way to create more empathy and compassion, or expand the ways we think and feel. I know it’s never within my control how people respond to the work I do, but the moments where someone has reached out and shared what something I made meant to them, it makes this whole journey worth it.
Contact Info:
- Website: http://bydesignwithjess.com and http://www.officialjessicarose.com
- Instagram: @officialjessicarose and @bydesignwithjess
- Other: Podcast: https://www.innerrebelpodcast.com/
Image Credits
Kristina Ruddick https://kristinaruddick.com/ Ian Brown Photography