We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Ashley Vargas-Butler a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Ashley, thanks for joining us today. If you could go back in time do you wish you had started your business sooner or later

When I think back, to when I started Doula Strong I do wish I would’ve jumped into it sooner with both feet. But in the same breath I would not have changed a thing. The timing in my life seemed perfect, the decisions that I am currently making to move us forward would not have worked if it were years ago. My business started like a seed about 10 years ago. I was pregnant with my first, and did all the things; I researched, I educated myself, and I chose a provider that I thought would help me have the birth I wanted. What I was met with was dismissal, I felt like they weren’t listening when I spoke, everything was chalked up to this being my first time birthing. Sadly, the dismissing continued right into labor. The lack of care I recieved caused me to have a traumatic birth. Before I knew it, I was shellshocked, alone in a hospital room, while my husband was miles away in a NICU with our daughter. The doctors were telling us that they didn’t know if she would make it. Now, lets fast forward a year or so later, my daughter lived, but was not unscathed from the damage of the trauma we shared. So there I was, a young mother with a child who had brain damage, and epilepsy wondering how i could’ve changed the outcome, or stood up for myself. I read about the rate in which Black mothers were dismissed, not taken seriously, and even worst died. I was shocked, this didn’t come up in my searched before, and I finally came upon a word I had never heard, a word that would change my life. DOULA. Then I promptly fell down thst rabbit hole. I was shocked to find out that you could hired someone with experience in labor to be there for you emotionally, physically, and answer whatever questions you had about the process. From that point it took years, more research, and a brave mom healing herself to make the leap into creating Doula Strong. So when I look back I wish I would’ve jumped sooner, but also the leaps we are taking now as a business couldn’t have happened right away. It was a slow burn that needed time.

Ashley, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

Hello! My name is Ashley, I am the owner of Doula Strong in Chicago, I specialize in first time pregnancy support, high risk pregnancies, and supporting people with previous traumatic births.  I have been married to my husband for about 13 years and we share four, yes, FOUR kids together between the ages of 10-4. Not to mention all of my plant babies. Before children and creating my business, I worked with infants and young toddlers for over a decade. 

I created Doula Strong after a traumatic birth with my first where I did not feel heard, where I was dismissed, and treated poorly. After my birth I felt alone, and confused, left in physical pain, and with a child suffering from a traumatic brain injury. I personally feel that if I’d had doula support, maybe our birth would’ve been a little different. 

I am currently expanding which is exciting for me. I am looking to add lactation, and nutritional help to my offerings in the next year or so. We are looking to educate and support parents from pregnancy all the way through the first 12 weeks of new parenthood. 

We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?

I have learned a lot about myself while growing a business, especially one in the service of other people. A couple of lessons I had to unlearn was not setting boundaries and letting go of things in order to make room for growth. Since I am in the business of serving others, it was very hard for me to say no to clients. This was coming at the detriment of my physical and mental health. That is why so many doulas burn out so quickly. I had to unlearn that “giving my all.” Was not what was best for me, my business or my family. Now I set clear boundaries, and if they are in need of more, or longer help then I guide them in the direction of others who can take over and meet their needs. The biggest thing this year for me has been to let go of things that I have outgrown, or that no longer fit with the direction I am headed as a business. I felt like I worked so hard to achieve certain things, and that letting them go would be akin to failure. I have realized with the help of a mentor (shout out to Brandie at Your Tribe Family Services) that I am taking all of that knowledge to the next level, and that is definitely NOT a failure. As we move from just offering doula services to the next steps of lactation and nutrition, the knowledge that I have gained is the foundations for this coming level, I can’t bring the baggage with me! 

We’d love to hear the story of how you turned a side-hustle into a something much bigger.

At the beginning of my doula career I was working a 9-5 at the same time. It was hard to balance both, but being a doula costs a good amount upfront. As the years went on I found myself really comfortable working and I was really not willing to let that go out of fear of taking that leap into working for myself/contractor. It got to the point where I couldn’t balance both anymore and took that leap. It was beyond scary, but so necessary to be on the creative birth space all the time in order to propel forward. Now I am able to help support myself and my family. I am able to pay for my education out of pocket and scale up as needed. I love managing my own time.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doulastrong/
• Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/DoulaStrong
• Yelp: https://m.yelp.com/biz/doula-strong-chicago