We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Natalie Fideler. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Natalie below.

Natalie, appreciate you joining us today. Has your work ever been misunderstood or mischaracterized?

Being an artist is really weird. So many creators live in a cloud of self doubt that holds them back from accepting their goodness, but the mere act of making art starts with the assumption that someone in the world will be better off with your art in existence. When you create something, there is a vulnerable version of yourself immortalized in your creation. You can only hope that someone out there will understand your intentions, relate to your commentary, and experience some catharsis from consuming your piece. The risk of exposing your vulnerabilities always comes with the fear that someone will misunderstand you/your art and walk away from it with a negative impression you did not intend.

I used to worry a lot about being misunderstood as an artist. I was really concerned with how I presented myself and if I came across in the way I hoped. I was overwhelmingly caught up in the “branding” of Natalie Fideler and how to make her impact people the exact way I wanted. I was plagued by thoughts of how to make myself more palatable and marketable, and I soon realized that I was putting more effort into my image than I was actually creating.

Being an independent solo artist is exceptionally weird. Putting my legal first and last name on all my music is equivalent to proclaiming with my whole chest, “I undoubtedly made this, and listening is going to show you a part of me you might not know or like.” It’s incredibly vulnerable. You can’t hide behind the intent of other band members or collaborators. This is what I have to say and I mean it, and it’s horrifying!

The key to letting go of my fear of being misunderstood was never a business strategy, and trying to solve the problem with marketing tactics was a futile pursuit. I had to truly confront the fact that my chosen artistic pathway demands radical self-acceptance. Come to terms with the humanity of being an artist. You cannot expect a person to be a marketable good. When you reduce a person down to their marketable traits, they become a one-dimensional caricature of who they really are.

Being misunderstood is a part of being human. To go through life without being misunderstood is impossible. There will always be people in the world that don’t like what you do or who you are, and those people are welcome to steer clear of you without it having any deeper meaning. Causing true harm with your words or actions is a very different thing than not being liked, and people will tell you if something you’ve done is harmful. All you can do is trust your moral compass, express yourself, and take a leap of faith.

The fear of being misunderstood is rooted in the fear of being fully understood, warts and all. Being an artist means painting pictures of your flaws and putting them on display. Your portfolio is a detailed timeline of how you’ve grown as a person. Take pride in where you’ve been and how far you’ve come. When you show your true colors, your true fans will find you, and their reception will mean more to you than you could ever imagine. You are a whole person with an entire life’s worth of complications and eccentricities. Tell your story unashamedly, and remember that everyone else is just as human and misunderstood as you.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

I’m Natalie Fideler, and I’m a lifelong musician! I currently work as a private music instructor at Blue Tree Music Education, freelance as a composer/orchestrator/engraver, and release original music as an independent artist and performer.

I’ve been studying multiple instruments, singing, and composing music since I was 3 years old, and music continues to be the light of my life every day. My parents were inclined to put me in music lessons because I apparently could keep a beat before I could even walk. They often tell this story of me sitting in my car seat as a baby, bobbing my head in perfect time to a song on the radio.

I wrote my first bonafide song when I was 9 years old after my dad gave me his old Dean Bel Aire. It was a simple song about being bullied. Looking back on it, it’s clear that I was called to music and original writing to help myself understand the world around me and release the feelings within me that I was brave enough to sing but not to say. Music has always been my means of emoting; It helps me process my feelings to understand them better and blow off steam when the feelings get too big.

As an adolescent, I took every opportunity I could to play music and hone my craft. I’ve tried everything from orchestral timpani to jazz guitar to rock drum set, and just about everything in between. I received my bachelor’s degree in Music Composition and Women’s and Gender Studies from Concordia College in 2019. My time in college allowed me to re-explore my musical background with the renewed perspective of a composer rather than just a performer, which allowed me to refine my compositional voice and solidify that songwriting is the kind of composing that makes my heart happiest.

In 2018, I recorded my first solo studio album “Steak & Eggs” under the name Natalie Fideler. This record started as just a hobby project to get some good recordings of my favorite original songs. I knew that the recording process was fun, but I’d only ever done it within a collaborative band setting before. Taking to the studio by myself was a game changer. I played all the instruments on the record (drums, bass, guitars, keyboards) and sang all the vocal lines you hear on this album, and I had never been more proud or happy before. It was a major core experience for me.

When I graduated college in 2019, I knew I needed to keep writing songs and making records to feel personally fulfilled. I began teaching private piano and voice lessons at Blue Tree while taking contract work on the side for notating sheet music and writing TV/movie/advertising music. I struggled for a long time trying to figure out how to make it work. Should I try to sign a record deal? Should I live out of my car hoping for my big break? Should I try to be the next Taylor Swift or something?? I didn’t have much time to answer these questions before Covid-19 changed the world in 2020.

The pandemic was so hard. It was the first time in my life that I didn’t have a performance to prepare for or an audience to perform for, which didn’t help the all-time-low mental health of experiencing a pandemic. I was so depressed and anxious all the time, but I continued time and time again to return to songwriting to help me live another day. I eventually came to the realization that making another record was the only thing I could do to feel better.

I was lucky enough to receive the $10,000 LGBTQ+ Emerging Artist Award from Music Forward in 2021, which funded my second studio album “Three Man Army” released in 2022. Being chosen to received that award is another one of my proudest achievements. This record was much more collaborative, as it features my bandmates Leigh Underwood on drums and Hailey Jacobsen on bass, and some of my pals from college playing their classical instruments! To say the making of that record was healing would be the understatement of the century. It is yet another major core experience contributing to who I am today.

The pandemic and the making of my second record came with a lot of reflection and meditation on how music fits in to my life and its trajectory. I was able to remember again and again how music is and always has been my emotional outlet and happy place. Being a superstar would be cool, but writing songs in my room and recording them with my friends is a blessing that is more than enough. Lot’s of artists quantify success as “doing music full time,” which I already do!

All I could ever want is to make the music within my soul and share it with the world. I just want to be honest, wear my heart on my sleeve, make something beautiful, and leave my mark on this world. All I need to do that is my instrument, my journal, and a pencil. The “work” I do in life is to protect that and keep it alive. I can only hope that my music touches my listeners’ hearts and moves them in some way.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

The biggest and most important lesson I’ve had to unlearn time and time again is the definition of musical success. I constantly return to the question, “What defines my success?” and often find myself needing to redirect my focus in order to truly see my successes.

For a long, long time, I pictured success as being a rockstar. I don’t think I ever admitted it to myself outright at the time, but I felt like I’d never be able to call myself successful unless I had a massive following and a hit song on the radio. I think it’s a very common dream to have, especially as a late-90’s baby raised in the “you can do whatever you put your mind to” era. But there came a time for me right around the Covid-19 pandemic at which I had to reckon with that dream. I felt myself comparing my success to all my colleagues. I was never celebrating what they were doing, and always putting myself down for not doing what others were. I had to dig down deep and truly understand, what does success mean to Natalie Fideler?

I think the world I was raised in predisposed me to define success as making lots of money, becoming a famous household name, and touring/playing packed shows every night. It took me a really long time to realize that I had a white knuckle hold on to those standards, and that measuring my success against those standards would be the death of my artistic life.

My best measure of success is my personal fulfillment. Is creating this music fun? Do I feel happy composing? Did I convey what I set out to do? Do I feel accomplished at the double bar line? Answering yes to those questions will mean more to me than any commercial success ever will. If I’m not fulfilling myself, what am I doing?

Looking outward for affirmation as an artist is like trying to fill a glass with a hole in it. It can be filled but will never be full. Measuring my success by looking inward and confirming that I’m doing what I meant to do and fulfilling myself is the only true way I ever feel affirmed as an artist.

When I look back on my first musical endeavors, my draw to music had nothing to do with money or fame. It was about expressing myself, understanding sounds and how they fit together, making something creative, and just having fun. I have to connect with my inner child to experience that kind of wonder again and fully recognize that THAT is why I do music. Whenever I start to lose sight of my end goal as a musical artist, I try to remember 13 year old Natalie dealing with her first experiences of trauma, grief and depression by locking herself in her room and learning her favorite songs on guitar. In a way, she taught me everything I know.

Is there mission driving your creative journey?

My mission is to express my truest self in well-crafted original music!

I believe the key to meaningful art is to express your truth, no matter how taboo the topic may be. The world is a messed up place that leaves us all with more questions than answers, and consuming media that discusses the hard things helps us all feel more okay. My favorite songs are the ones that confront the gruesome head on. When I hear a song that feels like its speaking to the exact darkness I’m trudging through, I feel so uplifted and understood. I want my music to bring that same feeling to others.

I find my writing heavily inspired by the post-Romantic musical tradition of verismo (Italian for realism). Verismo opera continued the Romantic tradition of expressing grandiose emotions through instrumental music while also introducing telling the stories of the common folk. Verismo operas were all about making accessible art that told a realistic human story with music that was just as emotional as the story itself. I seek to do the same things in my music: uplift the true human experience no matter how taboo, and compose music that emotes the same experience.

I think owning one’s flawed humanity is so important in the year 2023. It’s so easy to portray an edited lifestyle with social media, and only consuming the edited severely distorts your perception of reality. I think listening to and reflecting on the raw human experience can help you stay grounded and remember what’s really important to you. I truly just want to write music that makes people feel seen, heard, and understood. I want that for myself and all of my listeners. I want to inspire others to not shy away from their truth and to make art that is beautiful no matter how taboo, grisly, or unheard-of it may be because it is true.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.nataliefideler.bandcamp.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nataliefidelermusic/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nataliefidelermusic/
• Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/nataliefideler
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/nataliefideler
• Other: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/67VCjum1SGMmN4FLIpq1JF?si=leUR4–wRmmeqL0MKYcgZA Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/natalie-fideler/1435725805 Linktree: https://linktr.ee/nataliefideler

Image Credits
Individual credits in the photo file names as well Sam Bramble – headshot and full band photo Zach Owens – piano photo Adam Nantz – side profile photo Melanie Kraemer – circular light long exposure photo