We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Michelle Tovar a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Michelle thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Can you share a customer success story with us?

In my time training educators and as a classroom teacher myself, I realized that engagement is one of the primary factors of client success in any learning setting. Being a witness and coaching this dad who started off a little resistant to learning new perspectives, to making this huge shift only a third of the way through my program is absolutely astonishing!

“It’s week 4 and I am already seeing the impact this work has on me and my family. I always thought the way I was responding to my children was the right way because that is how my parents did things. I am realizing that this way is better for me, for my children and for our relationship! This work is so powerful!”

-Dad of 2 (ages 2 & 5)

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

Thank you for this opportunity to share my story. My story starts out with just having such a deep love for children at an early age in my life. It was probably around the age of 12 through my teen years when I began working with children and families as a babysitter. I was able to see firsthand different family dynamics that were separate from my own. I also experienced vacationing with some of these families and saw how they managed stressful situations with their children. It was very natural for me to be around children and it was something I really enjoyed. I eventually went to college and became a teacher, specializing in Maria Montessori’s philosophy and principles. I worked with children ages 2-12 for over two decades as a classroom teacher & mentor. Through my training, I learned to deepen my ability to “follow the child.” To look beyond certain behaviors and meet each child’s needs not only academically, but socially and emotionally.

One of the common threads I did noticed during my interactions with my student’s parents was a need for support. Many of our parent-teacher conferences, parents seemed overwhelmed and frustrated with the demands of modern day parenting. I would find myself supporting parents with their parenting obstacles and encouraging them to use effective strategies that I used in the classroom environment.

A huge personal shift happened for me after the Parkland shooting. Active Threat drills were put in place more frequently and I would witness my small first and second graders hiding under tables, shaking with tears in their eyes. This really rattled me to my core. I clearly remember one drill where I had less than 2 seconds to make a decision to either lock the interior door and barricade inside the classroom or evacuate the entire class outside. At that split second, I looked at my co-teacher who wanted to barricade and I wanted to evacuate and we both froze. We quickly decided to barricade because it was too late to flee. I went to lock the interior door and the person acting like the perpetrator was standing right there. I had failed the drill! I couldn’t sleep that night thinking about our delayed decision and how that would’ve caused casualties to the entire class. Why do we not feel safe in schools anymore? Why are we taking valuable learning time to do these monthly drills? What happened during the shooter’s childhood to lead him to want to do this to innocent people?

After the pandemic hit, parents began to struggle even more. Trying to balance working from home with helping their kids learn in school virtually. This was so difficult for many parents. In 2021, I decided to pursue a parent coach certification and eventually started my own business, Practical Life Parenting-The Parent Life Coach. I started coaching 12 weeks into my training and haven’t stopped. As a parent coach, I help overwhelmed parents that are exhausted from the daily power struggles create more connection, cooperation and joy in the home through my parent-centric program and coaching.

Because of my many years of working with students as a Montessori teacher as well as being a mom of 3 boys myself, I am able to really connect and understand things from both perspectives. I am able to create genuine trust and understanding with children and guide parents to do the same.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

I think as any business starting out, there are definitely growing pains. As an educator for so many years, I had to learn how to create a business plan, how to feel comfortable putting myself out there, and most importantly truly understanding my value & worth. Feeling comfortable with pricing my services was definitely something I had to overcome.

The reality in this country is that the Mental Health of our youth/adolescence is in crisis. Psychologist, therapist and licensed counselors cannot reach everyone. They are completely saturated. We do know that it takes a village to raise a family. Parent coaches are becoming a such a monumental piece of that village for so many families.

My parent coaching business is thriving. I  truly enjoy connecting with my clients and witnessing their personal transformation. I provide a safe space where parents can try new things and grow more confident in the decisions they make for their children because they have a better understanding of attachment, nervous system and brain science. I help parents build a deeper, long-lasting connection with their children while unleashing residuals from their own childhood. Parents get to learn new perspectives and tools and their children get to grow, make mistakes and not feel shamed or blamed during the process. It’s powerful work!

How’d you build such a strong reputation within your market?

Nearly 50% of all parents agree that family is the primary go-to as far as advice on parenting, but what if you want to do things differently than your family did? In the words of Whitney Houston, “I decided long ago never to walk in anyone’s shadow.” It’s my goal as a coach to walk parents through their generational patterns that are no longer serving them, so that they can learn to become effective leaders for their children. When we know better, we do better!

Here’s what I know to be true: we have the choice to create the future we want for our children. We don’t have to repeat these patterns if they are not aligned with our core values. This is why coaching is so important. Just reading information on parenting doesn’t always equal the transformation you hope for. So as a parent coach, I guide parenting partners to strengthen relationships, learn emotional intelligence and bring more joy in their homes. I help parents figure out why specific situations with their children are so triggering. I walk with my clients into the “weight” of their past, so that they can intentionally show up for their children and for themselves each day! Children deserve the best version of the leaders (parents) in their lives, not perfection but growing into the adults that they want their children to eventually become.

I have been through many experiences in my life, both good and bad, that have brought me to this point. of my journey. The experiences you go through shape you as an individual. Following my passion and dream of being a business owner and serving children through their parents is something that fuels my soul. I have been told that I am an individual that exudes peace, calmness and has the ability to bring the noise down or diffuse a situation. I enjoy bringing in different perspectives and exploring ways on how to approach common issues. I love to teach my clients ways to access more presence in their lives and to feel more grounded. I’ve been told that I have an acute ability to listen without judgment. I don’t see these attributes as luck, I see them as I was given this ability to support, guide and advocate for children through peaceful parenting practices.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://theparentlifecoach.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/parentlifecoach/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theparentlifecoach
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelle-tovar-58b4b1235/

Image Credits
@Copyright SelinaMariePhotography2022 Jennifer Lauren Photography 2019