Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Brian Pate. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Brian, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today We’d love to hear about the things you feel your parents did right and how those things have impacted your career and life.

My mother and father were huge influences in my life. As an only child, I was given opportunities that many kids did not receive. Dad was a newspaper publisher and mom was the ultimate stay at home mom in the 80’s while also volunteering hundreds of hours per year. Dad pushed me hard in school. Even though I hated high school especially, he pushed me to put forth an effort. Looking back, I wish I had worked harder, but who knows what life’s path might have looked like.
When I finally moved away from home after dropping out of college, I remember standing beside the car. It was a Mercury Topaz with a 4X6 enclosed trailer from U-Haul holding everything I owned including my bed, DJ equipment, dog and records. He said, “Can we please go back inside and discuss this one more time?” I knew he disagreed with what I was doing and I was being a jerk because I wanted independence so badly. I responded to him with, “It amazes me that you can be 42 years old and so clueless about the real world.” Then at age 20, I got in the car and moved to Raleigh.
We had some tough times because I was headstrong and resisted his advice because I wanted to get everything on my own, not because I was known as “Mike Pate’s son.”
As we age into our 30s and 40s, it seems our parents get smarter. I know mine have. Recently, I was attending a football game with some friends of my parents and made a comment. Then I paused and looked at them and said, “I apologize if I open my mouth and my father comes out.” They all laughed because it was exactly something my father would have said in the moment too.
Today, there is a fine line for parents. With technology in the hands of children from an early age, there are many distractions.
My mom and dad took me at a young age, with a suit and tie on, and taught me how to meet people, how to properly shake hands and how to properly interact with adults. I have always been more comfortable around people a little older than me and I think it is because of that early training.
Now, many years later, I realize how valuable learning to network is and have passed it down to my children.
In true Gen X fashion, I roamed the streets of my home town of Myrtle Beach, SC as a teenager. Mom and dad had no clue how far we would go on our bikes and later in our cars. When we were young, we had to be home when the street lights came on. If not, my dad had a conch shell he had bought on one of our vacations and he would blow it to give me the signal to come home. Everyone in our neighborhood knew when it was time for me to come home.

Brian, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

I started my first business at the age of 14. it was a mobile DJ company and I would play music for middle and high school dances, birthday parties and neighborhood get togethers. As time went by, I moved into nightclubs including Studebakers in Myrtle Beach. Thanks to my parents, I LOVED 50s and 60s music so it was an outlet to see how the high paid club DJs worked. As time went by I got on the radio and moved around to different clubs. I loved music and always wanted to be a lead singer. However, if you heard me sing, you would understand why it was better for me to be a DJ.
After a couple of ill advised years at college and spending more time partying than studying, I came back home. I moved to Raleigh in 1989 to work as a DJ and work with World Championship Wrestling as a ring announcer occasionally. It was a fun life but it was no way to live. Being on the road or out until 4-5 am every night caused many of life’s experiences to pass by while I was sleeping.
In 1992, my grandfather gave me $180 to take a real estate class and I passed the class and state exam. I almost couldn’t believe they would give me a real estate license. During the course, my instructor, George Bell, told me he thought I would be good at the business. He proved to be a mentor as my career grew, especially in the early years.
After two years selling real estate, I was asked by Sharon Pelt of Fonville Morisey Realty in Raleigh, to teach the same license classes that I had just completed. It sounded like fun and compared well with being a DJ. After all, Teaching was similar to performing in my head.
After retiring from the nightclub business in 2001, I focused more on real estate while doing weddings on weekends as a DJ. We built our wedding DJ roster with some of the top DJs in the country . While that was happening, I also accepted my first job managing a real estate office.
For me, it was a perfect fit. Helping agents to achieve their goals and DJing on the weekends was a perfect balance for me. it gave me time to spend with my kids and allowed me to attend many events that I would emcee for.
In 2012, I decided to leave management and get back into selling real estate. As my real estate business grew, it became more challenging to give the DJ business the attention it needed to run successfully.
The year 2014 was a big year. Our DJ company, now booking over 150 DJs nationwide, was named the top wedding DJ service in the country by www.weddingindustryexperts.com. With that being the pinnacle, I asked myself what else there was to do. I had always joked that I didn’t want to be 50 years old saying, “This is a couple’s skate only!”
I sold the DJ company to one of my DJs and he continues to run it to this day. Selling the DJ company allowed me to focus on real estate and when I did, it exploded!
My team quickly grew to 15 people and we sold upwards of 40 million annually in real estate in the Raleigh/Durham market and ranked in the top 1% of real estate teams nationwide.
I loved the people on our team, but I was working 60 or more hours per week. I had one daughter in college and another in high school and was recently separated. It was almost as if I had forgotten how to live life, because I was working so much. Real estate had become my life when it should be the way to a better life.
I did something most agents would never think of doing; I scaled DOWN. I have always said, “If you want to make your business big, make your focus small.” As team members left through attrition, as they do, I didn’t replace them. After a couple of months, everyone left and I got to be a solo agent again.
The clients I worked with knew me and I knew them very well. If something went wrong, I knew who did it. My business was perfect. I was working less than 25 hours per week, teaching a few classes here and there and God brought my soul mate to me.
Since then, I have tried to take on other responsibilities but I always come back to selling real estate and teaching.
Today, I am with Real Broker, LLC in Wake Forest, North Carolina (where Wake Forest University used to be before it moved 2 hours west). I also teach training and continuing education classes and coach about 20 agents to help them grow their business.
The best part is, I am in control of my time. I don’t work on Sundays unless there is an offer to be negotiated. That is my time for my wife (that soul mate I was talking about earlier).
Years ago, I took a class from Floyd Wickman’s coaching program called, “Sweathogs.” My instructor was a guy named Gary Sisson. In that class, he told us over and over, “Real estate should not be your life, it should be a way to a better life.” I veered from the correct path a couple of times, but I am back there now living that mantra.

What do you think helped you build your reputation within your market?

One of my favorite stories of my career took place with a seller I was representing. He was a tough customer. He was very demanding and some would say insulting. I was VERY blunt with him after our initial meeting. I often asked him, “And how many years have you had your real estate license and how many homes have you sold?” in order to back him off. I used every objection handling technique in the book. He was just an unhappy man but we got the job done.
After we finished signing the closing paperwork at the attorney’s office, we went outside to part ways. He looked at me and said, “You may be a real jerk sometimes, but you sure are good at your job.” He continued, “I appreciate you always being up front with me and standing firm when it needed to be done.” That may be one of my favorite things anyone has ever said about me.
Sometimes, I come off as egotistical (many successful agents d0), and I may come off as blunt. However, my goal is to hit you in the face with what you NEED to hear as a consumer and not what you WANT to hear. If I don’t think I can sell the listing at your price, I won’t take it. If I think you are being unreasonable, I will tell you.
Ultimately, it is your home and I work for you. It is my job to explain your options and guide you to a decision that best benefits you based on the information you have received.

We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.

Most people never know unless I tell them, but I was diagnosed with Systemic Lupus Eurythmatosis (SLE) when I was 24 years old. Multiple blood clots destroyed my right leg. I deal with the Lupus every single day. I am always tired, even after a good 8 hours of sleep, I still feel like most people would after 2 or 3 hours of sleep. In 1999, I started 2.5 years of chemotherapy for Lupus Nephritis, or kidney disease. I was given the choice of taking a kidney and living with dialysis for the rest of my life or doing the chemo and hopefully living a somewhat normal life.
In 2003, I drove myself to the emergency room at Duke University and ended up in the Cardiac Care Unit with pericarditis. I spent almost a week in the hospital recovering from it including a very unusual “in body” experience when the doctors thought I was unconscious until I repeated back everything he said during the procedure.
In high school, I was an athlete and love sports, especially baseball. As a matter of fact, I played baseball until I was 52 years old. Not old man softball’ fast pitch, wooden bat baseball with kids half my age.
At this point in my life, I can’t risk an injury so I stopped playing.
Each day God gives me is a blessing and I honor him by making the most of every day he gives me and will give me going forward.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.paterealty.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bp8realty/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/djbrianpate
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/brianmpate/
• Twitter: https://twitter.com/djbrianpate
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/brianpaterealtor
• Other: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@bp8realty