Today we’d like to introduce you to Margaret Thompson

Hi Margaret, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today?

Both of my parents were actively involved in the arts professionally. My dad was a visual artist who taught at DePaul University for a few years before opening his own private studio, and my mother directed musicals, choirs and plays in various school systems and churches. My involvement with the arts began early. I started classical piano lessons at the age of five and played in recitals by the age of six. I performed with the Rialto Children’s Choir in Chicago due to my mother’s involvement as the director at the time; I performed in her musicals throughout elementary school, and by middle school and high-school I was performing solo piano recitals, performing background music for various private functions, as well as participating in school and church choirs, musicals, and extremely local commercials.

At the age of fifteen, I decided to go to school for piano performance instead of acting because I felt there was more opportunity for a sounder financial future. At eighteen, I began my studies at Temple University in Philadelphia as a piano performance major and spent one and half years there before dropping out.

While I was fortunate as a child to have been brought up in an environment that raised me to be the performance artist that I am now, I also grew up amongst extreme family dysfunction and chaos. The experiences I endured as a child gave me a very ill-informed understanding of what healthy and non-abusive relationships look like. Most of my time at the piano and in my creative studies, were used as coping skills to escape the dynamics of my family. While I naturally love the arts and have a predisposition to be an artist, the intensity of my focus was developed as an escape mechanism. I am thankful for the discipline I developed early on, even if the credit is owed to my need for a safe space in childhood.

After many tumultuous years, my parents ended their marriage in a bitter divorce that deeply affected me during my first year at Temple at age nineteen. Additionally, I couldn’t live with my sister anymore because the abuse had become so extreme. I was also navigating my first of several violent stalker situations that I would encounter throughout my life. Due to these extraneous circumstances, I became homeless and relied on friends’ couches to sleep on. I was fortunate to have people who helped me during my time at Temple.

Unfortunately, due to my childhood conditioning and the traumatic series of events that happened in the first year and a half of my college experience, I ended up in an abusive situation with my first serious boyfriend. I spent two years being monitored and caged. I didn’t have access to my phone, he was the only one in contact with my family. My only reprieve was practice, but it was limited because he would make sure to escort me back and forth from Rock or Presser Hall after an hour or two. I had lost direct contact with my family and the freedom to practice for hours. It was a nightmare and I truly felt that the only way out was death.

Finally, after a year and a half of living in that environment, I was pulled out by my mother and aunt who put me in a 72-hour hold to keep me separated from my ex. After those three days, I went with my mother to Florida where I began rehabilitation and AA/NA programs.

Shortly after, I moved to Michigan and rediscovered the joy I had lost in music. I began practicing regularly again and started auditioning for local theater productions in the area. I began to work at a non-profit theater that my mother was running as Executive Director, and life seemed to feel brand new. In late 2014, I received a scholarship to finish my piano studies at Western Michigan University, and I continued working remotely for my mother at The Acorn.

While I had been regrouping my joy for the arts and performance during the early months of 2014 in Michigan, I had unfortunately entered a second, longer lasting abusive relationship that lasted for almost eight years. While studying at WMU, I once again endured fearful living, and began drinking to cope. Additionally, I witnessed the traumatizing death of my father and lost multiple other beloved relatives a year later. My mom and I attempted to rebuild a relationship with my sister, but it ended destructively, so much so that I required major reconstructive shoulder surgery and had to drop my performance degree and instead finish with a BA in Music and a Minor in Communications. It felt as though my entire performance career was over. It was a devastating period of extreme loss and confusion. Between my limited playing abilities and living situation, my toxic coping needs increased, and I began drinking and smoking marijuana and cigarettes regularly every day.

Despite the challenges I faced, I managed to build a life for myself in Three Oaks, working with my mother to build The Acorn’s Volunteer Program and stabilizing operations by developing protocols and manuals. I sought out local relationships with the fire department to ensure that staff were CPR certified. I also performed piano a great deal with the help of physical therapy, Taubman Technique, and much easier repertoire. I had also started exploring acting again. In 2018, I met my first acting coach, Peter Carey. I didn’t know the impact that moving into professional acting would have on my life or how radically my situation would change over the course of the following years. Looking back, I am deeply grateful to Peter Carey for seeing my potential and welcoming me into a world of possibility and hope for my future.

When I started working with Peter, my mind began opening to the fact that my emotional and physical world WAS important and valid, despite the treatment I had been receiving since a very young child that taught me otherwise. For the first time, I began questioning how my soon-to-be partner/ex-partner was relating to me. I distinctly remember the moment I “woke up” spiritually. He was on a work trip, and I was home. I was studying my monologue for Peter and suddenly realized that the piece I had chosen was extremely applicable to my situation. I remember becoming extremely frightened as I realized that my life would end either literally or spiritually if I didn’t get out. Over the next two years, I continued working with Peter. I submitted and auditioned at every opportunity, and started building a compassionate relationship with myself through the work I did with various acting projects.

In 2021, my ex-partner broke the last straw. I finally couldn’t take anymore. While he was gone one day, I packed a bag and left. I called my mother from the beach, told her I needed to get out and I began divorce proceedings within two weeks. 2021-2023 were some of the hardest growing years of my life. I kept finding myself in situations that were like ones that I had been in. Clearly, my psyche was still trying to fix what had happened to me. I spent many evenings drinking and drugging, trying to numb the pain. I channeled the emotional hardship in classes and auditions while I lived and worked in Chicago. My drive to become a working actor became insatiable, as did my relationship with drugs and alcohol.

By the end of 2023, I encountered my final abusive relationship, the worst one to date. I had to utilize the police and other governmental resources to get him out of my apartment that he had taken over. The moment that clarified my next steps occurred at my last serving job in Chicago. I had a panic attack and slammed my head into a banister, leading to a minor concussion, because one of the chefs simply said hello to me in the hallway. At this juncture, I knew I needed help if I was going to continue my career as an actor. I am grateful to the restaurant managers, case workers and police officers who were compassionate, understanding, and worked with me while I gathered the required paperwork to leave my situation. I am grateful to my friends in Chicago who lovingly granted me housing in their apartments so that I wasn’t homeless. I moved back home to Pennsylvania in late 2023. I quit drinking and using drugs, began an exercise program and started a specialized trauma therapy called brain-spotting to overcome the scars of my past.

Now sober and in trauma recovery, I am much more productive, passionate and happier in my work. I find great joy and fulfillment in the skills I have developed as an actor and musician. I am also modeling alongside my acting and music career and am finding my way into photography through an assistant position.

My journey has been arduous and hard, but I know that everything I have achieved during my time is definitively earned and that I am worthy of my talents and the opportunities I receive. I have a deep appreciation and gratitude for the survival instincts I used to navigate my situations. I don’t berate myself anymore for “not getting out sooner,” or not speaking aloud about my experiences. Acting gave me my voice, my spirit, and my life back. When living in circumstances that conditions an individual to believe that humane treatment or kindness is undeserved, abuse becomes truth.

I am grateful to all the teachers, coaches, co-actors, and directors in my life who encouraged me and believed in my artistic abilities. While the work and relationships I have obtained as an actor and musician are due to the sheer drive and ambition that I naturally posses, I would not be standing in this position without the enormous support and love that I have received from my artistic community. I always say that acting saved my life, and that the debt I owe is my life’s commitment to the craft and the fellow artists, family, and friends who stand beside me.

Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?

If you haven’t ascertained already, my career path has not been smooth sailing! One of the biggest challenges was facing myself and the toxic ways in which I contributed to each of my situations. I am a believer that spiritual growth must come from within and can only be done through brutal excavation of one’s soul. If I can’t be honest about my deep dark truths in the privacy of my own company, how am I going to be honest in my craft as an actor? It doesn’t work!

During my time in Chicago, I was very lost and afraid. Thankfully, I had friends in my life that acted as guardian angels. Without their assistance, I’m unsure that I would still be alive today. When I moved into the Windy City, I was freshly released from my marriage and was in the process of mentally unraveling the tangled yarn ball that was my psyche. It was extremely painful, and many times I went to work in a desperate mindset, unforgiving and brutal towards myself.

Unfortunately, many survivors of narcissistic abuse experience what Dr. Ramani co-coined as DARVO: Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim Offender. Essentially, when victims finally escape the relationship, because we are grappling so much with questioning our reality such as, “did that really happen? How did I let this happen? Will anyone believe me? Am I wrong? Am I the narcissist?” we are seen as the ‘messed up,’ ones, because that is what we are projecting onto the world. Classic symptomatic examples of narcissist-victim mindset include over-apologizing, over-explaining, and knee-jerk PTSD reactions to perceived threats. However, instead of the outside observer seeing these traits as symptoms of abuse, it is viewed as symptoms of guilt. Victims of narcissists are so adjusted to, “taking the blame,” through guilt trips and manipulation that they are completely burdened with responsibility for the actual abuser’s actions. We truly believe we are guilty, even in basic things such as breathing or being alive. This is how I spent much of my time at work in the aftermath of my marriage; acting like I had done something wrong or becoming overly upset because of total emotional overwhelm and not differentiating my confusing past from my present. While I am not a bad person and have always had good intentions, my boundaries were a mess, I had ingested the toxicity of my captors, and my chaotic decisions were leading me into several scary situations that put my life and career at tremendous risk.

Since I had been raised in an environment that disregarded boundaries, I had developed relational patterns that intensified my insecurities and deep lacking in sense of self. I didn’t understand what healthy boundaries were and why I couldn’t connect with my coworkers and community in appropriate ways. While I don’t believe that acting should be used as therapy or a place to work out ‘inner-demons,’ I firmly believe that we receive the roles that are meant for us, and that has always been the case in my career. I believe that there is a mystic relationship between acting and channeling parts of ourselves and others. The character is us, and we are the character. Through my love of acting, I was able to develop a love for myself that is healing and healthy. My skills and abilities gave me confidence as an artist, and that became the first life-saving piece of individual self-identity that I attached to myself instead of seeking validation from an external source. I stopped judging the toxic parts of me and embraced them. Each part of my mind suffered and survived extreme circumstances throughout the different stages of my development. I cannot hate my coping skills for their short comings. I must love and understand them. Who else will if I don’t?

As my life flowed in Chicago and my performance skills solidified, I developed enough confidence and self-understanding to finally call it quits with my toxicity. The final situation that I discussed in my previous answer was my rock bottom. I was in my last abusive relationship when I started to understand that my need for external validation was so desperate that I was putting my life at huge risk.

Now, the obstacles I face feel easier and not as overwhelming because my boundaries are much more solid. I know what I want in my career and for my life, and I am headed in that direction. The entertainment industry can be tricky to navigate, especially when I was going through my soul’s dark night. I think the best action I took for my career as an actor was developing control of my behavior and my chaos through intense self-reflection, brutal inner-truth acknowledgement, and finally asking for help when I hit rock bottom. Sure, I have encountered a wide variety of personalities in my work, but the only personality you can control is yours. Becoming a more whole and better version of myself has been the biggest challenge that I have faced in my career.

Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?

Even though I am primarily an actor, I also play keyboard in a band called paintdry lead by singer songwriter and guitarist Josh Staalesen based out of Baltimore, and I am a model. In a few days, I will review my cover page for the fashion magazine called Fashion Republic, I am so excited to be on the cover! I am also competing at IMTA in New York this year, as well as completing three more film credits for my resume, potentially four, over the course of this summer.

The latest project I completed is called The Panic, now in post-production. It’s about the stock market crash of 1907 featuring Cary Elwes, Malcolm McDowell, and Justin Chatwin, written and directed by Daniel Adams. I played the role of Colleen. It was a wonderful experience playing with such incredible actors like Cary and Malcolm. I learned a lot during the day that I had on that project and will never forget the experience. The Panic will be available to stream on major platforms, and readers are welcome to research it on Google or IMDB. My upcoming projects include working with Director/Writer Jim Menza from Milknose Films in Chicago as well as Ryan Callaway with Shady Dawn Pictures in New Jersey. I am waiting to hear about some other opportunities in West Chester and LA as well, and I will be walking in Atlantic City Fashion Week on September 20th and 21st! Our band paintdry will be playing a concert on August 16th too, so I will be traveling a lot back and forth from the Midwest and East Coast!

Overall, my career as a performance artist is taking an exciting upward turn. I am eternally grateful for the lessons and experiences that brought me to the point of taking a complete 180 in my habits and behaviors. I believe my biggest advantage is my ambition and willingness to analyze my behaviors and adjust. I am always learning about my craft and my personality so that I can be the best version of myself possible. I am willing to take calculated risks to move my career forward, and I am not afraid of facing every facet of my emotional world. I also have never given up, despite some of the extreme experiences I have faced in this industry. I continue to practice, audition, and press on. I am an artist; this lifestyle, while unpredictable and very difficult, is not a choice for me. If I don’t continue to grow with my crafts and create, the idea of a career for money is meaningless to me. While I would like to be a full-time actor and make a living, I am in it for the genuine joy and love of what I do. That is what sustains me through the good, the bad, and the ugly.

What sort of changes are you expecting over the next 5-10 years?

The entertainment industry has shifted dramatically over the past few years, especially with the writer’s strike that involved SAG-AFTRA. I think there will be movement towards a middle-class level of creators in our industry. For so long, Hollywood, Broadway and general industry ‘big money’ was one of the only ways to have a career as an artist. Unless an individual ‘made it’ to that level, a lifetime career in the arts was almost inconceivable. However, with the advent in technology, which has its advantages and disadvantages, I think there is movement towards several tiers of acting wages. Just like SAG has Tier 1, 2 and 3 for production, I think there will be many levels that people can perform and be supported at.

I think we’re also starting to see more defined acting types in the job-audition market. For a while, a performance actor was classified as either ‘theater’ or ‘film’ without any degree of variation. With the advent of technology and media demand, there is a greater divergence in categorical establishment. From voice to commercial acting, I think the field is expanding to accommodate the growing number of people who want to participate in the arts sector, whether as a writer, director, actor, singer, etc.

I am unsure what the entertainment industry will look like in the next five to ten years, but I don’t think that big money productions are necessarily the end goal anymore, and I think that the range of job diversity will continue to push the boundaries of opportunity access and inclusion at all artistic levels.

Pricing:

• SAG Daily or Micro
• $100 for a Modeling Shoot

Contact Info:

• Instagram: realmargaretthompson
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8rjqhZHOGg3gXrma2JkKCA