We were lucky to catch up with Melissa Stylianou recently and have shared our conversation below.

Melissa, thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. Did you always know you wanted to pursue a creative or artistic career? When did you first know?

I was in Grade 12 (that’s what Canadians call 12th grade) and had just moved back to Toronto to live with my Dad. At my new school, there was a fairly robust musical theater and acting program, and I had been in the Drama Club at my old school, acting in plays and musicals (I was one of 30 Shark girls in our production of West Side Story!), so I signed up to audition. My new best friend Patricia Smith possessed one of the most beautiful voices I’ve ever heard, and it was understood she would get the part of Laurey in “Oklahoma!”. She asked me to sing my piece for her one lunchtime in my car. I must have been pretty understated and quiet – she kept urging me to sing louder and said we couldn’t get out of the car until I did. Her tough love worked – I nailed the audition and got the part of Ado Annie, and then the part of Anita in “West Side Story” the following year (Patricia played Maria). It was during those two years that I began to feel the pull to center stage and began to consider pursuing acting and singing in a serious way. I ended up in an intensive, 3 year conservatory style acting program in Toronto and vowed to stay the path. In my 3rd year, however, I experienced a crisis of confidence, despite excellent grades, feedback, and plum roles. I was just discovering singing jazz at the time, and once I hit the stage with my first big band gig, I felt pulled by a different wave. I respect and love the craft of acting so much, and I use those skills all the time, but I know I’ve finally found my calling with singing jazz and teaching music.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

I am a Toronto-born, NYC-based jazz vocalist and music educator. I have been singing professionally since the late 90s, when I formed my first band, “Slim’s Lucky Number” to play swing, jump, and jive music for dancers in TO. Soon afterwards, I formed a jazz quartet with veterans on the scene and dug deep into the jazz tradition. My first full length album “it never entered my mind…” (self-produced and released in 1999) featured jazz standards and bossa novas and just about 20 years later I would revisit this same territory with my project featuring jazz guitar legend Gene Bertoncini, in “Dream Dancing” (Anzic Records, 2022). This album received wonderful feedback, including a rare 5 star review in Downbeat Magazine and I still play frequently with Gene here in New York. In between “it never entered my mind…” and “Dream Dancing”, I explored repertoire out of the jazz realm, including songs by Björk, Tom Waits, Billy Joel, Johnny Cash, and also original songs. When I moved to New York City in 2005 to begin a period of intense private study (supported by the Canada Council for the Arts), I took it as an opportunity to figure out which direction to move into, whether to focus on jazz standards, originals, or even more avant-garde jazz expression. Nearly 20 years later, I find myself fully committed to finding outlets for all of my various musical expressions, and currently I am writing songs for a project that will explore my Irish and Greek-Cypriot roots. And for over 12 years, I have been a member of a kick-ass three part harmony group called “Duchess” with two of my best friends (Amy Cervini & Hilary Gardner), swinging and singing on stages big and small (from The Monterey Jazz Festival to the Jerusalem Jazz Festival). Not having had the traditional path (early music instruction, music school, etc) of many of my peers, I have instead taken a more winding road to this point in time. I teach music (private voice instruction, guest clinician, early childhood music specialist) when I am not performing. I routinely stop in my tracks to express gratitude that my life is filled with music and am surrounded by musicians who are constantly striving to be the best they can be and to connect with others. I hope that I can connect to audiences here in NY and around the world through recordings and performances, and I hope to keep honing in on my most honest expression of self through music.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

I continue to unlearn something I somehow absorbed decades ago – that I can’t be a “real” jazz musician because I didn’t go to music school. It is such a silly thought – that there is such a thing as a “real” jazz musician or a “fake” one, but I suppose it is my flavor of the Imposter Syndrome that so many of us (artists or no) experience. Each and every time I make a mistake (sight-reading is not my strong suit for example), I feel a tiny-to-huge warm feeling of shame rise up inside me. The size of the feeling and its duration depends on my state of mind at the time. At best, it fades quickly as I remind myself that everyone makes mistakes, and it’s not a big deal anyhow. Other times, I am positive everyone around me is saying something like, “Oh well, good thing she has a pretty voice/pleasant personality” or, “Oh, yeah, that’s right, Melissa didn’t go to music school.” I work hard to fill in gaps in my knowledge/skills, but as I get older, I am also reminding myself of the knowledge/skills I do have a great handle on, and how a lot of that came my way via a very different route than some of my peers. Some things I do very well are things that might not have even been touched on in a more traditional music education environment. Balance is important, and I will keep working, but I’ll also (quietly, to myself) pat myself on the back.

What do you think is the goal or mission that drives your creative journey?

This has become more clear to me only lately, really, but my goal as a creative person is to be as accepting of myself as possible, and to celebrate the person that I am. I feel I learn so much from artists who know themselves and share their stories artfully and honestly, and I strive to get closer to that with each show and album. I have recently discovered that, while I love drama and melancholy, I really love making people chuckle a bit (sometimes/often at my own expense) and creating a real relationship and intimacy with them for the time I’m on stage. I want to reach people and to sing with my heart, and recently I also desire to express myself ever more plainly, which is sometimes hard to do for me in the jazz context. It can be very tempting to show off skills or deliver something “impressive” in a solo. No shade, there is so much joy to be had in that arena and that can reach people as well (and anyhow, I don’t have a ton of tricks in that bag!), but I’m thinking more deeply about restraint and space when I sing.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.melissastylianou.com
• Instagram: @sleepinbee
• Facebook: Melissa.Stylianou
• Twitter: @sleepinbee
• Youtube: @MelissaStylianou
• Soundcloud: Melissa Stylianou

Image Credits

John Abbott, Shervin Lainez