We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Melissa Kinzler a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Melissa thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Can you open up about a risk you’ve taken – what it was like taking that risk, why you took the risk and how it turned out?

Risk has shaped both my personal and professional journey. At a pivotal moment in my negotiation career, I found myself as the only non-attorney in a room filled with legal professionals deciding the fate of yet another client project. Despite my experience, I felt like I hit a ceiling. I could have stayed in that room, continuing as a hired “fixer” for private companies, but something inside urged me to take a leap—not just to be a CEO’s VP or “right hand man”, but to level up and attend law school. To most people, litigation is about courtroom battles. But here’s a little-known fact: more than 95% of lawsuits never reach trial. They’re settled through settlement conferences, negotiation or mediation. This field is called Dispute Resolution. After learning these statistics and the field that dominates them, I chose to earn a Master’s Degree in Negotiation, Conflict Resolution, and International Peacebuilding, followed by certifications from two specialized programs at Harvard Law School designed specifically for those who wish to help attorneys and their clients settle lawsuits, rather than “file or trial” them. It was a natural fit and I fell in love with my work. I even wound up discretely coaching other attorneys and writing law firms training programs on negotiation. I still do this today, and am launching my next course for attorneys called Breaking Bellicosity in 2025.

Building a new career from scratch in midlife was no small feat, but I embraced the challenge and enjoyed the process. Before graduating at the top of my class, I was invited by international colleagues to help resolve some of the most complex and culturally multi-layered conflicts in the world. Eventually, I brought that experience back to California, launching LennoxCooper.com, where I now guide executives and leaders through conflicts that require a sophisticated touch. That risk—the decision to embrace uncertainty and trust in my skills—has brought me full circle.

Now, I offer useful guidance that changes lives for the better. The relief and freedom that folks leave the room with when their case is settled reasonably, is priceless. Each successful mediation or executive coaching project reaffirms that taking the leap was the best decision I ever made.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

I’m Melissa Kinzler, an executive conflict resolution coach, mediator of commercial disputes, and the founder of LennoxCooper.com. My journey began in the fast-paced worlds of finance and commercial real estate. I honed my negotiation skills in negotiation rooms, where I helped curate deals that required both creativity and diplomacy. Over time, though, I realized that my real passion was helping people find common ground in even the most contentious situations.

Today, I coach professionals across a wide range of industries on conflict resolution, from corporate leaders to legal professionals. One example is a medical group contracted with a hospital. The medical group’s doctors were pushing back against a patient discharge feedback survey process. To the physicians, the business-driven approach felt at odds with their desire to focus purely on their expertise of medicine. The doctors felt like they were being asked to act as salespeople, which conflicted with their professional identities as distinguished medical experts in their respective fields.

One of the key components in mediating business conflicts successfully is to bring in neutral benchmarks or accepted industry standards that can unify parties. I was able to help the clients reframe their task for the doctors in a far more useful way. We transformed the interaction from one perceived as a sales approach, to one based on the Hippocratic Oath; the oath of ethics taken by physicians to uphold healing practices. By bringing in a new and elegant framework that aligned with the doctor’s values, we were able to rework both the language and the intent of the task. This enabled the doctors to pivot, and approach the final patient discharge through the lens of authentic excellence in medicine – something that felt much more congruent to them. This created a path forward for doctors that previously felt stuck, and allowed the physicians to make a more positive impact on the patients. At the same time, the coaching I offered met the administrators goals, making a path forward to increasing the number and quality of feedback submissions. This kind of conflict management coaching ignites me. It allows me to bring solutions to all kinds of professionals, not only improving workplace dynamics but also positively affecting many lives or even elevating entire sectors, like the medical community here in California.

Can you tell us about what’s worked well for you in terms of growing your clientele?

Earning trust is equally important to my coaching clients as it is to my commercial mediation part of my practice. For that reason, I would say that in a field like dispute resolution, trust is everything. For me, it’s been less about promotion and more about building meaningful relationships, including positioning myself as a resource for those who want to settle disputes quietly, confidentially and out of the public eye. A significant part of that has been strategic networking within specific niche industries that I hold experience negotiating within. My practice focuses on a resolving complex disputes, especially in areas like intellectual property, business-to-business disputes, partnership disputes and multi-party negotiations.

I also believe strongly in contributing to Dispute Resolution thought-leadership. I regularly contribute articles, speak at events, and host workshops that not only share my expertise and insights with my clientele, but also establish credibility with industry peers. Contributing to the Dispute Resolution field in this way has been key in attracting clients who are seeking a conflict management expert with both the depth of knowledge and the real-world experience to handle their toughest conflicts. Leveraging platforms like LinkedIn has also been a game-changer. I was recently recognized as the top 1% of conflict resolution experts contributing to Linkedin, globally. Sharing negotiation tips, updates, achievements, and career insights allows me to connect with new clients while maintaining visibility with existing ones. And above all, delivering results for my clients has led to strong word-of-mouth referrals, which is the most powerful growth tool in my industry.

Q: We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.

Resilience is often forged in the fires of our most difficult experiences. One of my most challenging—and rewarding—cases involved mediating a complex, multi-party negotiation with high-level executives, federal agencies, and affected communities. Tensions were running high, and the conflict had escalated to a point where it seemed that resolution might be impossible. It required more than just negotiation skills. I had to navigate power imbalances, manage emotional volatility, and bring these parties—who barely wanted to speak to each other—to the table. Patience, emotional intelligence, and strategic thinking were my greatest tools in that moment.

Against the odds, using specific training from Harvard on peace-building with highly divisive parties, I was able to guide the participants to a truly party-driven resolution they could all live with. When you know how to facilitate healthy direct conversation between the parties in constructive ways – even around highly sensitive or difficult conversations – the collective mind solutions that emerge are astounding. The parties know their business better than you, so you better know how to tap into their mind, and put it to work in the sessions. Delightfully, in this case their relationships were also repaired in the process. This ability to restore relationships in mediation is particularly important for those at the top of their industry, where the circle is small and successful careers stand the test of time, so the parties are sure to see (or perhaps need) each other again in the future. If you can help them repair their relationship, it makes them stronger business figures in the long run. What began as a seemingly unresolvable conflict transformed into a collaborative future for everyone involved. This experience reinforced what I believe resilience in mediation isn’t about enduring conflict—it’s about seeing possibilities where others only see impasse, and expanding options for resolution.

While it’s true my work has been recognized by both the U.S. Congress and the California Legislature, the more significant reward for me is witnessing how effective conflict management can ripple through not only commercial enterprises but through communities, rebuilding trust and fostering cooperation where there was once only division.

Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?

What excites you most about your work?
What excites me most is when I help facilitate stressed out folks—who at first seemed so far apart and without hope —come to a place of understanding, communication and clarity. It’s empowering for them to take back control of their destiny, instead of wait for their fate to be handed down. Every conflict is an opportunity to create meaningful change. Whether I’m helping individuals resolve a complex legal dispute or coaching leadership professionals through internal conflicts, the transformation that takes place is profound, and long lasting. How many people can claim that in their daily life? Each one of us who can do so is lucky, indeed.

When this kind of transformation happens, it’s not just the conflict that gets resolved; relationships are mended, trust is restored, and both parties leave feeling better equipped to handle future challenges.

I find it deeply fulfilling to know that my work is contributing to a larger culture of collaboration and understanding, particularly in the high-pressure environments of the legal and business worlds. As Shakespeare so eloquently described, “Heavy is the head that wears the crown”. Even CEOs and Attorney Partners need a confidant and coach to validate their issues and give them a more empowered perspective with useful tools, particularly during times of change.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://LennoxCooper.com
• Linkedin: https://LinkedIn.linkedin.com/in/melissakinzler
• Other: [email protected] (858) 247-1547