Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Cessilye R. Smith. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Cessilye R., looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. Do you think your parents have had a meaningful impact on you and your journey?
I believe my parents impacted my journey in a big way and in a variety of ways. One way is in their love for me. My parents loved big…they still do. Growing up, there was never a doubt in my mind that my parents loved me and my sister. They were affectionate, loving and supportive parents and we said “I love you” all of the time. My parents weren’t perfect and they certainly have their blind spots (as we all do) but showing love through their actions is one thing that they got right. I believe it’s because of this that I love so hard. It’s why I lead with compassion, empathy and grace. Even to this day I see how some of the decisions they have made have been out of sheer love for their children and grandchildren.
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
So much about my current career makes no sense…until it does. One of my first jobs was in loss prevention at a local theme park. I worked undercover discouraging criminal behavior and apprehending anyone attempting to steal products. For over twelve years I worked in retail management and I loved it! I truly enjoyed meeting new people and some of my best experiences in leadership came from this field. My passion was dance though. I double majored in dance and psychology in college and my ultimate goal was to become a dance therapist. Unfortunately a knee injury set me back and I walked away from that dream, but for many years, dance was my life, so I taught dance at various studios throughout the years. Studios such as Diane Matthews School of the Performing Arts in West Chester, PA. But my joy was working at Arts 5th Avenue in Forth Worth, TX under the direction of Gracey Tune, leading the outreach program and of course teaching multiple classes throughout the years. I also founded and directed a non-profit in Fort Worth that exposed children to the arts in over 19 schools.
So, how did I go from loss prevention, retail management and dance to leading a groundbreaking maternal justice organization? Well, like I mentioned before. It doesn’t make sense…until it does. It took me a while to figure this out but so much of my past has influenced my present. Working Loss Prevention at nineteen years old. It was like bootcamp. I was thrown into the field and had to be quick on my feet and it prepared me to take risks. Years of experience managing people in retail and the daily opportunities to converse with complete strangers gave me the courage and confidence to step into this work and build wonderful relationships with stakeholders in Dallas. My ability to find healing in the things that bring me joy…dance. Working for and creating a non-profit sixteen years ago helped prepare me for non-profit work today.
Many years of infertility played a role as well, I just didn’t know it then. I had no idea that my past circumstances would eventually lead me here. Not to something that I own. But to do something that I have the pleasure of cultivating or tilling. Something that will long outlast me.
Have you ever tilled soil? To till is to prepare or cultivate (land) for crops.
Well, I see Abide as a type of land, filled with fertile soil just waiting to grab hold of seeds untainted by the sin of white supremacy and greed. Soil that is ready to produce ripe, delicious, whole and beautiful fruit. Not the strange fruit that has been produced through generations of blood stained soil.
Tilling soil is just part of the journey, because to till alone will not produce crops. You have to have sunlight, water, fertilizer and of course, the seeds. My hope is that the legacy of Abide will be nurtured by many hands that will play a role in producing a plentiful harvest. A harvest that looks like Black women and their children not just surviving birth and the first year of life, but thriving in their pregnancies, thriving in their birthing experiences and thriving in their communities.
Putting training and knowledge aside, what else do you think really matters in terms of succeeding in your field?
Sometimes the training and knowledge will come later. I believe true long-lasting success begins with passion and grit. Coming from someone who has limited formal education and a career path that had nothing to do with maternal health…I know. But I’ve also recognized that passion and grit cannot sustain success. You must also surround yourself with people who are experts in their field. If there is one thing that I have learned is that too much inexperience is like walking in a minefield. You can’t possibly be prepared for the next explosion. Recognizing when you need adequate help and having boundaries is crucial in a founder’s journey.
Redefining success is necessary. At Abide we choose to lead in a way that is counter-cultural. A way that pushes the traditional models of care and modes of business practices. We try to lead with loads of grace, all while challenging the status quo. It’s difficult to work in a way that is completely counter to how we have been conditioned to operate. Our systems function on high productivity at any cost and that cost is often at the expense of those doing the work. As a founder, the biggest thing I have learned is that leaders do not have to do things the way it’s always been done. If we can dream of a better way even in a culture that says it’s not possible. I say do the impossible.
If we say we want extended parental leave, create an extended parental leave policy. If we say that women and families are not valued, create policies that value women and families. If we know that childcare is unaffordable, create more child friendly environments and childcare stipends that support team members with dependents. If we believe in affordable and universal healthcare, create affordable and universal health care within your practice. If we believe in a culture that centers our humanity, create an organization that does just that. It’s actually not all that difficult. The most difficulty comes from stepping out of the culture we have been conditioned to operate in.
What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?
I had to learn not to seek to please, but to seek to be just.
This has been the hardest challenge for me thus far in leadership. I have over a decade of leadership experience but I admit that I am a recovering people pleaser. I don’t shy away from conflict because I am a firm believer that conflict can be good and refining. However, I crave peace and harmony. And as a natural empath, it poses its challenges. So as someone who feels deeply, I have had to learn to pull back on the heart and lead more with the head. This has helped me to make wiser decisions that aren’t tied to my emotions. It’s been a rough road but it’s all been worth it.
As I was unpacking my people pleasing tendencies I realized it stemmed from my childhood. I never wanted to disappoint my parents and I was always the peacemaker. I wear this hat proudly however sometimes that hat can cause one to shrink, take on more responsibility than one should and to cower in the face of conflict.
Sometimes you have to take off that hat so that you can stare the issues in the face and confidently make hard decisions.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.abidewomen.org
- Instagram: abide_women
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abidewomenshealth
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cessilye-r-smith-435480212/
- Twitter: abide_women
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGTCJ2LMtOxwtxXzk_UtxjQ
- Other: www.cessilyersmith.com instagram: @cessilyersmith twitter: cessilyersmith instagram: abide_birth