Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Ashton Dent. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Ashton, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Are you able to earn a full-time living from your creative work? If so, can you walk us through your journey and how you made it happen?

Being a chronically ill person, I realized in my early 20’s that there was no way I would be able to work a 9-5 for the rest of my life. I had endometriosis, adenomyosis, and PCOS symptoms from the time I had my first period at 10 years old. It only got worse as I got older and soon I found myself in and out of the hospital monthly getting fluids and pain meds to manage my periods. I worked daycare and was chasing 10 one year olds around daily, so there was no time to sit down and rest when the pain was peaking. I also was under management that was terrible to work with and was told many times I was just faking it to get out of work when I was literally crying on the floor while kids ran around me.

I can’t really say I had a passion for photography but I did see it as a possibility to get me out of working for someone else. My (ex) husband got me my first DSLR when I was 21 and I quickly became obsessed with learning. In the beginning I barely charged (if at all) for sessions and practiced endlessly trying to get to the point that I could quit my job and know I could make it financially. It took awhile and honestly, I probably quit too soon, but I had to get out of the situation I was in for my mental and physical health. Once I quit I threw myself into my business 100% and began taking on family, birth, and newborn clients. I LOVED what I was doing but there were many bumps in the road and the realization that owning a photography business was about 10% photography and 90% business. For someone that has ADHD and is a creative, I have really struggled with that part of being self employed.

For whatever reason, we (especially women) feel guilty for charging money or taking money for our work. It’s absurd when you consider how easy it is for men to do, but us? We should give it all away. I was barely making ends meet for years because of imposter syndrome and not wanting to ask for more. Ultimately that led to burn out because I had to work so much just to pay my bills. I no longer enjoyed what I was doing and I needed to step back because it was draining me. I took over 2 years off (I shot occasionally, but not often) and I really wasn’t sure if I’d ever go back. It wasn’t until my husband and I separated that I realized I didn’t really have much choice. I was ready to try something new, though. I’d been wanting to shoot boudoir for years but was intimidated by it, honestly. I didn’t know who I was as a person during those years and didn’t feel comfortable doing such intimate work with someone else. Boudoir isn’t just lingerie and pretty pictures, this work is healing for so many and you need to be able to hold space for your clients. If you can’t, you shouldn’t be doing it. My separation/divorce really opened my eyes and brought me awareness as to who I was outside of being a wife. My entire life revolved around my husband and now it was just me. I was free to do whatever I wanted and be whoever I wanted. I dove head first into boudoir and it became such a healing journey for me. I felt like my work had value and I was growing right along with my clients who were coming to me to find self love.

Not only was boudoir healing, it also allowed me to charge my worth. Being on my own for the first time ever (I was married at 18), I knew I had to charge enough to survive. I don’t just want to survive, though, I want to thrive and I’m no longer allowing money blocks and limiting beliefs to hold me back. The work I do is important and I’m allowed to charge what is needed to pay my bills and take care of myself without feeling guilty about it. I’m still learning and growing, no where near where I want to be, but I’ve found confidence I didn’t know I needed. If anyone out there reading this can relate to not feeling like you can charge more, I’m here to tell you, you can. You’re allowed to live comfortably and you don’t need anyone else’s permission to do it. The clients/customers that are for you will find you as long as you do the work to reach them. If I could go back 10 years I’d tell myself to invest in education, figure out my cost of doing business, and know exactly what I WANT to make to thrive.

You are worth it. I promise. Take the jump.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

I grew up in poor conservative community in the South that was nothing short of toxic. I was showing signs of extreme anxiety from a toddler on and it led to a lot struggle outside of what was already given to me living where I did. My early teens were spent seeking out love and attention from others that weren’t good for me. I was a mess, honestly. I met my (ex) husband at 16 and he was the first “normal” person I’d gotten close to. My brain that craved affection immediately clung to him so when he joined the military and left at 18, the thought of not being with my “safe” person was too much. We got married at 18, just babies. Our relationship was definitely unhealthy in the first few years of marriage. We had never seen a healthy relationship as kids and we were now living away from everything and everyone we knew in another state. After a few years we figured it out, or so I thought, and had a pretty good relationship/life. Fast forward 15 years and he’s gone for training for 2 years. I wasn’t able to go and in the end of it all he left me. At the time it felt like it had come out of nowhere, but looking back it was all right there in my face. I was just choosing to ignore it. Needless to say, my life was turned upside down and every plan or vision I had for my future went out the window. I had to start over and I also had to heal. I definitely stayed with him all those years because he was “safe”. He had a steady income, we had a roof over our head, we had insurance, and we had a stable relationship. I don’t blame myself for choosing stability over my own happiness since I grew up in such a chaotic environment. He loved me in his own way and I loved him.

That long story all plays into where I’m going, I promise. I’d already been considering Boudoir photography and had kept putting it off for years. Boudoir is vulnerable, even beyond the physical aspect of it all. Someone is trusting you with their body, their mind, their fears, and you need to be able to hold space for them. I’d decided I was going to just do it in early 2023. I put down a deposit with a graphic designer for branding and as soon as I hit send on that deposit my husband TEXTED me breaking up with me. Looking back it feels like it all happened for a reason, but at the time I was gutted. The stages of grief are long and hard, but I used that to fuel me in starting a new boudoir business.

I never went into boudoir thinking any of it would benefit me, but it turns out it’s been key in my own healing. Boudoir photography isn’t just “hot” pictures. Honestly, I feel like that’s the least of it. Women come to me because they’ve experienced a trauma or loss of self and they want to use this experience to find themselves again, or for the first time ever. I work with women trying to heal from toxic relationships. I have moms who have given 100% of themselves to their kids and one day realize they’ve lost themselves in motherhood and want to take their bodies back. I have folks that have spent a lifetime hating their bodies because of the unrealistic expectations society puts on us. Showing people what they look like through my lens has been one of the most rewarding experiences I’ve ever had and it’s really helped me to heal, as well.

What’s been the most effective strategy for growing your clientele?

Authenticity has been the most effective strategy in growing my business/clientele. People want to see the human behind the business. I think we’re all exhausted by social media and the facade we’ve all put on to appear to have the perfect life. Everyone has something hard going on in life at some point or another. Seeing that I’m a relatable person makes them want to work with me. I share a lot on social media and most of my clients know my story. I have clients thank me for my authenticity and being so open that they feel like they know me when they come to me. Be yourself and be real. We’re all craving connection and something real in a world that is disconnected, so I try to give my clients that.

What do you find most rewarding about being a creative?

The most rewarding part of all of this is seeing the way my clients respond when they see their images and leave their session. Many cry, most say they can’t believe that’s them, and I usually get a lot of thank you’s with hugs at the end of it all. In a world where we feel like we can’t ever be enough, I want to give people a different perspective so they can see that they are. It’s not about the pictures, it’s about stepping away from all the noise and giving themselves something that their souls need. It’s a life changing experience that my clients use on their journey to self acceptance and self love.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.feralfernboudoir.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/feralfernboudoir
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552257815920

Image Credits

Chelsa Jay Photography – Headshot