We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Emily Graf. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Emily below.

Hi Emily, thanks for joining us today. How did you come up with the idea for your business?

I have been drawn to birthwork and supporting birthing women for a long time. My mom is a midwife, and I grew up in the warm circle of her “witchy” friends, other midwives and women’s healthcare providers who supported each other with warm meals, friendship, and laughter. I was intrigued by these women, and felt they carried some kind of mystical connection to the Source of life itself. I have also been a fierce advocate for women’s liberation from a young age, volunteering at Planned Parenthood, marching in pro-choice rallies, and facilitating women’s circles in my community. Then, in my late-20s I had my own experience of obstetrical trauma when I needed to have an IUD removed that was partially implanted in my uterus.

During this excruciating procedure, I was getting close to the edge of my pain tolerance and was considering asking the OBGYN to take me back to the OR for anesthesia. Then, I over at the nurse who was supporting the procedure. “Will you hold my hand?” I asked her. And she did. In that moment, the simple act of holding someone’s hand made all the difference for me. I was able to continue with the procedure and have the IUD removed without needing surgery or anesthetics. This experience catalyzed me to begin walking my path as a doula. I knew that birthing people were even more vulnerable than I was during my procedure, and needed someone to hold their hand. I saw deep flaws in the system of women’s health and maternity care, and I wanted to be part of the solution. As a student of shamanic and ceremonial practices, I understood that birthing women enter into an altered state, and that it is essential they have the support and guidance of a trusted space-holder as they navigate birth. As a doula, I offer physical, emotion, and spiritual support to my clients across the continuum of motherhood—pregnancy, birth, and postpartum, as well as miscarriage, loss, and abortion.

I believe that our world needs women who are resourced, nourished, and standing in their power. Birth can serve as a rite of passage experience that allows women to access their power, feel their own strength, and emerge more whole. And yet, our current system of maternity care often leaves women feeling fractured and traumatized. As a doula, I see my role as standing beside my clients during their pregnancy to support them in crafting the birth plan that’s most in alignment with their values and desires for their birth. I offer education on different birth options (birth center, hospital, home birth) and interventions. Most importantly, I support my clients in building trust with their own mind, body, and spirit so that they can surrender to the process of birth.

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

I am a DONA-trained and a Matrona-certified full spectrum doula based in Boulder, CO, and I’m a passionate advocate for returning birth to the family.

Through my training with Whapio Barlett and the Matrona, I absorbed deep teaching about the natural physiological processes of birth, and learned how best to support birthing people through the different brain wave states accessed during labor.

I am a voracious reader and birth nerd and bring a highly educational approach to my work with clients, doing her best to ensure that clients receive the most up-to-date information about their options in pregnancy, birth, and postpartum, so that they can be in the driver’s seat of their motherhood journey. I’m passionate about bringing partners/family members into the birth circle so that they feel confident in supporting birth when the time comes. I’ve worked in hospitals, birth centers, and home birth settings around Boulder County and tailor my education and care to each client’s birthing location and to their vision for their birth.

I’m also Reiki certified and infuse energy work into my prenatal visits as well as into labor and birth. Further, I’m a student of shamanic healing ways, herbal medicines, and sacred plant medicines.

I believes birth is sacred, and that this sacredness looks different for each client. To this end, I offers Blessingway (mother blessing) Ceremonies during pregnancy as well as womb closing ceremonies postpartum to create intentional spaces to honor the transition into motherhood.

I believe that the first 40 days after birth are some of the most important in a mother’s life and can set the stage for her future health. I love supporting new mamas during this time through postpartum doula support. I offer bodywork, herbal and plant baths, peristeaming services and nourishing in-home cooking to postpartum families. I completed my postpartum doula training with Geneva Montano of Sacred Birth, a Denver-based homebirth midwife.

Above all, I am committed to serving as a presence of reassurance and trust for birthing people and their families and supporting them in having a positive, empowered, and transformational birth experience. I am a Wilderness First Responder and former outdoor educator, and my work in the wilderness has been instrumental in understanding how to support birthing people as they journey outside their comfort zones in labor.

Outside of birthwork, I’m also a writer and poet. I publish my writing about birth and beyond on Substack at viajera.substack.com

How’d you build such a strong reputation within your market?

The most important piece of my journey has been building relationships in my community. Period. I have spent time on digital marketing, joined various doula collectives, sent out emails and put up flyers. But in this line of work, showing up for women in my community—both clients and colleagues/friends— has made all the difference. My clients know that their sense of safety and trust is my top priority, and that I will always go the extra mile for them (sometimes literally— I drove 32 oz of donor milk into the mountains for a client.) Going to birthworker meet-ups and joining local in-person networking groups has also been incredibly helpful for my business.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

Something I’ve had to unlearn is that I need to “take every client” who comes my way. Some clients simply aren’t the best match, and that’s okay! Earlier on in my business I felt like I needed to take everyone who wanted to work with me, but now I feel comfortable referring out to other doulas who might be a better fit for that client’s needs. My business thrives when I feel really good and excited about the client I take on.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.emilymgraf.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/firefly.doula/
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emilymgraf/
• Other: https://viajera.substack.com/

Image Credits
Skyler Sun