Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Casey Bojorquez. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Alright, Casey thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. We’d love to hear about a time you helped a customer really get an amazing result through their work with you.
As someone deeply committed to helping others, I want every woman or family I work with to be a success story. One standout story comes from the early days of Surrogacy Is. At the time, I served as a surrogate advocate, conducting initial screenings with women who were looking to embark on their surrogacy journey. Questions like, “What are you looking for in this journey?” “What kind of parents do you want to work with?” “What kind of agency are you hoping for?” were vital in guiding our process. As I was listening to one woman share her story, she said, “I’m an experienced surrogate, but with my first journey, I didn’t know what to look for in an agency. I just went with the first one I found because I thought they all work the same.” Little did she know, not all agencies make an effort to ensure each party is aligned and happy. In her initial profile, she specified that she would love to work with parents that live close by, to be there at doctors appointments, and to be present to witness the birth of their baby. However, she realized this was not going to be the case. Her original agency told her that they only had Chinese intended parents who don’t speak English and won’t be available to meet any of her requests. She was informed that these conditions were non-negotiable and she would never find another agency that has intended parents that fit her criteria. Being naive, she continued further and matched with a couple who, as expected, didn’t speak English, she was not offered a translator, and they were only able to communicate minimally by WeChat throughout the whole journey.
Many women often overlook the importance of looking for an agency that can also provide surrogacy-friendly insurance. This surrogate mother realized only after the fact, that having to pay out-of-pocket for appointments and working with international parents who could potentially “disappear,” risked her being left with bills and debt generated from the process. Unfortunately it was too late, she was already pregnant with the couple’s twins.
Throughout the entire journey, she was alone. The intended parents were absent for appointments, and her agency never checked-in or supported her, leaving her to navigate this incredibly complicated and beautiful process herself. Even on the day of the delivery, the isolation persisted.. She attempted to notify both the agency and the intended parents that she was going into labor, but received no response. When she delivered, she was alone. No one was there to hold her hand or witness the beautiful birth of these babies. After giving birth, she was discharged from the hospital knowing the babies were still there. She later discovered that a nurse had been hired to retrieve and care for them for three months before they were sent to their parents in China.
As I listened to her tell this story, all I wanted to do was support her and explain how wrong that was. It would be wrong of me to say there aren’t any crappy agencies out there, because unfortunately there are. However, there are also exceptional ones. At Surrogacy Is, our mission is to empower and encourage women by bringing awareness to the positive experiences that can occur when they work with the right agency. So that’s what we did for her. Despite this initial journey, she felt motivated to do it all over again, regardless of the outcome.
For the start of her second journey, we were still just advocates so we did what we did best – educate her on how to vet the proper agency that will support her and align with her dream. Four years after her first surrogacy journey, we connected her to an agency that gave her the fairytale she was looking for. She was able to have a real relationship with the parents, they were present for every appointment, and they were there, holding her hand in the delivery room. She finally got to witness her intended parents hold their baby that she helped make a reality. Today, she is now just a few weeks postpartum, still pumping milk for the baby, knowing she got the surrogacy journey she had always dreamed of.
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
Prior to Surrogacy Is, I had my Bachelors in Criminal Justice and thought that was going to be the way I save the world. At the same time I witnessed a very close friend of mine struggle with infertility. I had just had our first baby and shortly after found out that I was pregnant with our second. She started crying when I told her, not out of happiness for me, but out of heartache for the many miscarriages she had gone through. At that point it hit me, I had been so naive to the fact that having a child in your early twenties wasn’t as easy as trying and making it happen.
I watched her go through this whole IVF journey which inspired me to learn more about surrogacy. I was that weirdo who liked pregnancy so I thought “I can totally do this.” For me, being a mom is everything and what I feel most proud of at the end of the day. I could not imagine a world where I wasn’t able to be a mom so I decided to become a surrogate. To help someone build their family in such a profound way, it is so much bigger than you or I.
I fell in love with surrogacy because I saw the intended result. Seeing the parents holding their baby, and knowing that was a joy that I helped create, made me feel like a superhero. This was going to be how I save the world, but I wanted to learn more, so I went and worked for an agency. When I entered into this process, I didn’t know that not all agencies look and operate the same way. While some operate under the American Society of Reproductive Medicine (ASRM) guidelines, I quickly realized that some do not. I was lucky with the agency that I initially worked with and had a wonderful experience, but I met other women who completed their first surrogacy journeys and heard the same testimony: “I wish I would have known…,” inspiring my desire to advocate for and educate these women.
Surrogacy Is was developed from a place of wanting to bring education to the incredible women who chose to pursue a surrogacy journey and didn’t know what questions to ask, and for the intended parents who approached the process with fear and reservations.
Through our advocacy efforts, we originally vetted agencies and narrowed in on the ones that operated ethically. Over time, we had the opportunity to observe these agencies and came to the realization that “they are great, but we could do better.” We could be providing better support, education, benefits, and more. So I finally approached my partners and said “hey guys, we need to be an agency.”
I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but for me, it was like a necessity. At that point we knew that our agency had to go above and beyond. We were creating services that didn’t exist yet, addressing needs generated by an industry that hadn’t evolved in the last 35-40 years. No other agency currently offers what we do. From connecting surrogates with nurses to walk them through the medications and protocols for the embryo transfer to providing an in-house paralegal to ensure the contracts match the signed benefit packages, we are working to offset the shortcomings and brokenness established by many clinics and agencies that cut corners.
The most important service we can offer surrogates and intended parents is the education and support to make the journey as enjoyable and safe as possible. We actively encourage them to ask questions and advocate for themselves throughout the entire process. This commitment is what sets us apart, as many other agencies would prefer both parties to remain naive during the process. Although we do receive a lot of pushback from other agencies and the attorneys involved, we will continue to take it a step further in what we do and the services we offer.
The one thing I want anyone reading this to know is that surrogacy is beautiful. As both a surrogate and an intended parent, the whole process can be scary and overwhelming, but with the right agency guiding you, it can be doable.
Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?
I recently learned that there are numerous ASRM guidelines, put in place to maintain the ethicality of the process, that many agencies and clinics choose to forgo. Not all IVF doctors require intended parents to complete a consultation to understand their readiness for the process. I assumed that most, if not all, agencies follow these guidelines in an attempt to protect all parties, but in reality, there are some steps viewed as simply a hurdle to get over and therefore removed.
The reasoning behind these parent consultations is for them to really understand how to set themselves for the mindset of any possible result. I learned that even some of the very best clinics don’t necessarily do this. This is something we have made sure to implement for all of our intended parents as it will benefit them to understand their communication styles, traumas they’ve gone through, and what they’re looking for in this journey.
How did you build your audience on social media?
From the start, we have been using every social media platform to educate our followers and spread the conversation around the overall unawareness in the industry. The information is not being shared, not because people don’t want to, but because industry professionals purposely want to keep others naive and from having power through knowledge.
I believe our audience has grown because we are discussing necessary topics and having difficult conversations. The recent release of our podcast invites women to share their stories of grief and the harsh realities many of us face. The idea behind it was to bring awareness to anyone willing to listen and share differing perspectives so we better understand each other and how we can improve on a stale industry. We are successful because we’re open to the taboo topics and have become a source for any individual considering surrogacy.
If I had to offer advice for any trying to build a social media presence, I would say be new, be current, and offer something unique. Don’t be scared to say something important for fear of receiving a negative response. Be prepared and able to share a perspective that no one else has the courage to.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://surrogacy.is/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/surrogacy.is/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Surrogacyis
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/casey-bojorquez-a05b1956/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJJb2k_e_kX1C-tBj4eVXfg
- Other: Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/0ZL3kyxuHa8sK2KPldn54b
Image Credits
All images can be credited to Surrogacy Is