We recently connected with Paulina Bylard and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Paulina thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Can you tell us a story about a time you failed?

This year (2023) has been the most challenging, and most of my internal battles had to do with feeling like a failure. I lost my job towards the end of the summer and I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders because I had to start having difficult conversations with my husband about money. Thankfully, things have been okay, but the pressure remains for myself because I have been stuck in a rut trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. A lot of things haven’t been aligning for me, and I’ve been torn trying to choose between finding a job that will help pay the bills vs. putting in all my time and energy towards my passion, which is to write and make it into a career. However, it’s been difficult to feel any sort of motivation, and I began to struggle with anxiety and depression. I got to a point where I realized I’ve never felt so lost before. Being someone who is independent and likes to make my own decisions, I’ve felt the opposite in this situation and it’s been unsettling to say the least.

Even though I am still currently going through this weird period, it’s given me the opportunity to do a lot of self-reflecting and I’ve gotten the chance to get to know myself more. I’ve purposely have lived my life trying to keep as busy as possible so I wouldn’t have to pay attention to my mental health, but right now, I was essentially forced by life to sit down and take a look at the bigger picture so I could come to terms with where I’ve been mentally/emotionally and be ready to take a chance on myself for once. I did have a few wins to come out of it such as finishing my second novel and gaining the courage to begin looking for literary agents to take that next step in my writing career, but of course that doesn’t take away the fear of getting rejected. It’s very easy for me to get in my head about it, but I’m getting to the point where I’m feeling exhausted putting myself back into a rut. That same exhaustion is my tool to push myself to feel motivated again, and although it takes time, I’ve learned that true failure is only when one decides to fully give up.

My battle continues with myself, and although I still have my days of sincerely feeling like I failed in life already, I’m nowhere near wanting to give up on my dream. I’ve learned to not compare myself with others even though it’s so hard at times, but that hint of at least picturing myself where I want to be is hope in itself. I hold onto that, and I let it guide me to continue my growth as a person so I can achieve everything I’d like to do.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

My name is Paulina, or you can call me Pau or Lina, and I’m a 28 year old writer living in the Bay Area with my husband. I love starting off my mornings sipping on a cup of coffee so I can catch up to the never ending, scattered ideas popping up in my head to make a story out of it. I graduated with a business degree from San Francisco State University back in 2019, but my passion has always been to write. I’ve known I wanted to be a writer since I began writing short stories at around six years old and it’s the one thing that makes me incredibly happy.

I wrote my first book, Collision, back in late 2018 while I was still in college since I got a lot of inspiration from one of my favorite shows, Stranger Things. It’s a cross-genre of sci-fi and psychological thriller that explores the idea of different dimensions and contains a story filled with loss, hope, and love. It was a passion project where I mixed my current genre interests and personal emotions; When I finished my book, that’s when I knew my dream became bigger than I ever imagined it and I wanted to continue writing novels. I self-published it which means everything falls under your control, (marketing, book design, sales tracking, etc.) because I didn’t really know how it worked at the time trying to find an agent and truthfully, I didn’t have that much confidence to take that step and get a book deal. I was scared of rejection.

Since then, I’ve been battling with writer’s block like any writer does, started writing different types of stories but left it because it wasn’t going anywhere, and then ultimately decided to start a blog called An Author’s Open Book where I had my social media followers send in topic requests and I’d try writing an article based on that every week or so. I wanted it to be a platform where I could connect with readers on a more personal level and talk about mental health. I managed it for two years, and it’s currently on pause because I knew deep down I still wanted to write more novels and I needed to put my full focus on it. I did finish a new novel about a month ago, and I took that first step I was scared to do last time with my first book which is to find an agent to hopefully land a book deal one day and continue doing what I love to connect with people via stories.

For you, what’s the most rewarding aspect of being a creative?

The most rewarding thing about being a writer is having the chance to make art from your own imagination, experiences and emotions to connect to people. My favorite quote I like applying to my writing is from the late actress Carrie Fisher,

“Take your broken heart and turn it into art”.

I live by that because I am a firm believer that whatever it is that people go through in life, no matter how difficult and hopeless it may seem, there’s beauty that comes from it in the long run. Being human means feeling, and the best stories that are told through writing is when any emotion is encountered with great detail; Any writer has the power to connect with readers by simply digging a little deep and finding what’s in one’s heart and bring it to life through words.

Is there something you think non-creatives will struggle to understand about your journey as a creative?

Yes, I think it comes down to the well-known safe vs. risky argument in a career path. It’s completely understandable with one half thinking it’s best to stick to something that will be easier to get into and help pay the bills because we all have that responsibility. On the other hand, you have the other half willing to put in the work and energy towards their dream of pursuing something on the creative side whether it’s writing, music, theater, etc. Unfortunately, whether we like it or not, the arts can be very difficult to make a successful career out of it, but the passion that exists for us creatives is on another level that I think the first half won’t fully understand.

We run with it because I like to think we are very connected to our feelings, and we aren’t afraid of them. Anything in the arts requires being in touch with your emotions, and personally, I do believe that is a wonderful and beautiful ability to have. It sort of feels like a “calling” when one is drawn to that kind of work, and it ignites a very indescribable spark that not many get to experience. I think that is the main thing non-creatives will struggle to truly understand.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/paunbylard/
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paulina-bylard-3a5183146/